Voicelessness and Emotional Survival > Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board
Do antidepressants work?
sKePTiKal:
Ales - this really was true of me:
--- Quote ---... kids of Ns who grew up depressed and withdrawn, kind of like I did, dont realize their own moods have been oppressed by those around them (not just the people, but the environment).
--- End quote ---
It was a case, of where I learned to assign negative values to my feelings - all of my feelings pretty much... because of how I was treated, or neglected or told I was crazy and imagining things... what we call "gaslighting", only I was gaslighted about myself. Basically, it made me focus on "me" as a the source of all that was wrong and bad and accidents and it was all my fault. There was something "wrong" with me. Something that couldn't be diagnosed; it wasn't an allergy... all the time. It wasn't brain damage. It wasn't anything physical at all.
Sometimes, we experience either long-term or traumatic invalidation of our personhood; our identity and self. And it's this invalidation that convinces us that everything bad that happens or is experienced is "all our fault" - because of WHO WE ARE - rather than the more obvious explantion of circumstances, or mistakes, or accidents - or sick parents or abusive environments/families. A while back, I found a web site that had some easy to follow - and very helpful information. I saved the link for invalidation, because this is the closest explanation for why I grew to believe those rediculous things about myself. Maybe you'll find some inspiration and explanations and connections there too.
http://eqi.org/invalid.htm
The good news is that this state of "who we are" and "how we are" can change. Support from others who've been changing, trying to change, trying to figure out WHAT to change... was/is the most important "treatment" or technique or philosophy that I needed. Maybe you too? Guess what this board enables us to do?
SilverLining:
--- Quote from: Ales2 on November 15, 2011, 01:43:22 PM ---
Also, someone told me something yesterday that stuck with me and I am trying to digest. Her POV was that kids of Ns who grew up depressed and withdrawn, kind of like I did, dont realize their own moods have been oppressed by those around them (not just the people, but the environment). Those people tend to be more passive and more likely to believe something is wrong with them when nothing is (aside from the negative environment) and so they go off seeking remedies (of various kinds) that ultimately dont work, while not realizing they are more in control of their moods and life than they realize. That description sounds an awful lot like me, so I have to wonder if it applies to my depression as well.
Thanks for your post.
--- End quote ---
I think you are really onto something there Ales. In my case, I don't believe I was born withdrawn and depressed, but I certainly became that way after 20 years of dealing with the environment primarily created by the FOO. Depression and withdrawal in effect was a defensive reaction or "bad habit" that came to seem normal over time. And this has physical/chemical effects. The chemical effects are just symptoms of the depressed state, and thus the depression is not going to be chemically cured without changes of thought and mind (IMO).
I went through the false process of chemical cure many times and the outcome was always the same. After a short burst of stimulation and euphoria, I ended up in the same place I was before, except with the additional problem of chemical side effects.
Navigation
[0] Message Index
[*] Previous page
Go to full version