Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board

Voicelessness and Emotional Survival => Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board => Topic started by: Hopalong on May 29, 2006, 01:03:43 PM

Title: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Hopalong on May 29, 2006, 01:03:43 PM: Dear Mum,
You and several other people have now and then referred to your experience of setting your intention, and trusting that the universe will respond to your need. You mentioned it in the Selling Out thread when you were talking about your return to optimism after a period of negativity.

I struggle with having that trust, and wondered if you and others who do find a strong optimism is working for you, might want to explain more about how that came to be and how it works in your lives.

Is is meditation? Positive affirmations?

For example (this is my selfish reason for the thread)...I am quite worried about finding another good job, as so much depends on it. A good job, so I can keep our home. Do you believe that in addition to the work of a job search, that there are other personal practices that might help?

I would love to learn more about this from anyone who has found a deeply optimistic and positive way to look at worry...fear...uncertainty....change.

(And absolutely no offense, and deepest respect, to anyone who wants to share their faith in God from any tradition...but I don't need to read more about that just now. I'm looking for different language--may amount to the same thing in essence, I realize!) Thanks for understanding.

Hops
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Portia on May 29, 2006, 01:16:14 PM: Hiya Hops

A good job, so I can keep our home

What helps me is: what's the worse that could happen? and seriously consider it, and make a back up plan.

So...I don't get a good job, we can't afford to keep this house - then what?

once I have a back up plan in my mind, doing the positive stuff is much easier (i.e. removes the fear).

If all else fails (for me) I shall sell my house and buy a big sleeper van and travel around Europe. Then become penniless and live off whatever is available. Sounds okay to me!
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: mum on May 29, 2006, 01:56:23 PM: Oh, Boy, Hops, I could write a book. But instead, since I can't post for long right now...
I read tons of stuff. I took what worked for me and left the rest. Some things I read did not make sense when I read them, but they did later. Some things still don't make sense to me.

My dad lived this way. I heard him say it, and saw him do it, but never really "got it" until lately.

here are some books that I got lots out of:

The old standard: The Power of Positive Thinking by Norman Vincent Peale
The Power of Intention by Wayne Dyer
The Power of NOW by Ekhart Tolle (heady stuff....I suggest the smaller "Practicing the Power of Now"....a lot less cerebral...)

THis is cracking me up....they all say POWER!!!

And although at first glance, the following books/teachings seem contradictory in their content, they are not really:
Almost anything by Pema Chodron (Buddhist teacher)

And the one that helped me clarify the seeming conflict in the above works: Creative Visualization by Shakti Gawain.

Gotta Run. Just want to add that it is NO COINCIDENCE that you are asking this, and that people are hearing you. Do you recognize that is the universe responding to your intention?????
It's really that simple.
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: moonlight52 on May 29, 2006, 01:58:36 PM: Hi ya Hops , This subject is very important to me for many reasons.Its like letting go of the fear of the situation to make room
for the good experience to happen.Like attracts like we live in fear there is where we stay stuck(i am speaking to me as well)
Just like MUM says thinking and thoughts are so important.Thinking positive is the most difficult when you are being tested but that is just the best time to use MUMS scorpion PROCESS .Watch the tape in your head and then do it.Its like brain washing in pure
light of Gods Love Hops You are all wisdom wrapped with wit .Very marvelous and amazing .There is no reason why all you deserve
should not and will not be. And so it is true
Moon
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: mum on May 29, 2006, 02:09:47 PM: Excellent point, Moonlight!! I really should go, but this kind of thing just brings me such inspiration.

Your CORE BELIEFS about yourself must align with feeling deserved of such goodness. Otherwise, as Moon put it, like attracts like...and all the reading or thinking in the world will not line up....if you don't think you are truly worthy of love and goodness and prosperity.

It's ok to want a good life. It is something I had to relearn. One of my core beliefs was that I was not deserving . Ironically, I did not learn this inner tape from an N....or at least not just one. I learned it from a centuries old religious tradition and my interpretation of it. "We must suffer to be good and to be loved by God." Bulls***t!!!!! This mentality lies in fear. In a consiousness of lack and a mindset of fear.
I knew it wasn't right because of my dad, but he was not able to impart this to me entirely while I was younger. I saw his association with the Catholic church as in total disagreement with how he lived, but for some reason he managed the conflict. Maybe because he was male, I don't know. Or maybe I just needed to find it my own way, in my own time (likely).

Anyway, good stuff here. Keep searching....keep the faith that you will find. (my dad's mantra, by the way>>Keep the Faith)
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Healing&Hopeful on May 29, 2006, 02:12:14 PM: Hiya ((((((((Hops)))))))))

Don't have long but really wanted to reply briefly to this.... I don't really think it's about meditation or positive affirmations... it's about believing you really deserve it. Once you feel you deserve the job and you know you can do the job better than anyone else, I feel this comes across in your job interview.

Maybe with the next job you look at, think about why you don't think you deserve it, write it down and then trash it... then write down all the reasons why you can do the job, why you deserve the job, and how you can do the job better than anyone else. Once you know you're the best person for the job, why should the company employ anyone else? If you want to post it here, I'll be really happy to read it, but if not that's ok too...

Hope this makes some sense.... I've just used the job as this is something which is relevant in your life at the moment, but you can turn this round to why you are a good friend, a good mother etc etc etc....

Take care

H&H xx
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: pennyplant on May 29, 2006, 02:19:49 PM: Quote from: mum on May 29, 2006, 01:56:23 PM
Just want to add that it is NO COINCIDENCE that you are asking this, and that people are hearing you. Do you recognize that is the universe responding to your intention?????
It's really that simple.

Hops, I'm as much in awe of mum's approach as anyone could be and I like to absorb what she tells us. Just wanted to comment in particular on her idea of "no coincidence". I have seen this concept for myself. Don't really have any concrete examples to give you to illustrate it, though. My version of this is that the same things keep happening in our lives until we learn the lesson that is in there. People come in and out of our lives in order to have an effect on our journey and we can have an effect on theirs. There are patterns in our lives. I only realized how this worked a few years ago. It took awhile to put together that my whole life had been working in this way. And if it works this way in my ordinary life (by ordinary I mean that I'm not some kind of psychic or mystic), then perhaps it is a bigger force than me and that is how it works for everybody. Now I am starting to be able to see what lessons may be coming my way by looking at what keeps happening and who keeps coming along. I'm not always right about which lesson or which direction, but at least I know enough to start PAYING ATTENTION to what might be indicated by the "coincidences".

Mum seems to have tapped into it. Moonlight seems to understand it intuitively. I'm just in the beginning of being able to see it. So, if my explanation and comments don't make a whole lot of sense, well, I'm still trying to explain it to myself.

I just think that mum is really onto something here. Awhile back I asked her about it myself--don't remember which thread it is on but she did give some details about how it started for her.

That is funny that so many of the titles contain the word Power. I'm guessing "power from within" rather than "power over".

PP
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Hopalong on May 29, 2006, 02:45:53 PM: Wow. Thank you all, so much.

Portia: That's just like what Victor Frankl concludes in Man's Search for Meaning, which I recommended to somebody else once! (I can dish it out but can't take it in, evidentlly. What a twit.)

H&H: Busted. You got me. This is my core problem: believing you really deserve it

Mum: You are amazing. Knowing that this is the universe responding to my intention...not sure what that means or how it works. Is the simplicity just that I asked the universe (by starting the thread)? If so, I can see that.

And...I AM
Quote
truly worthy of love and goodness and prosperity
? Oops. I see with my urge to add a question mark that it is plain I don't have it firmly in my mind...there's my task. Whew.

Moon:
Quote
And so it is true
The simplicity of this...helps a lot. Thank you Moon.

PP: It is that wondrous assumption, that the universe even notices, that I wish so much to make. But maybe I should just "try it on", instead of trying to prove it before I risk it. Hmmm.

I've got to turn this around fast!!! But thank you all so much for pointing me there. That really is it, feeling unworthy of good fortune, and I had not realized it.

Very, very gratefully,

Hops
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: pennyplant on May 29, 2006, 03:59:27 PM: Hi Hopsy,

Two things--

With me, I don't think I believe that the universe notices my life. I think I believe that my life is an equal participant in a universe that has a certain rhythm, rhyme, and reason. Now, how's that for a ringing endorsement? "I think I believe." If I come up with a better way to put it, I promise to clarify.

The second thing is a question: What do you mean by risk?

PP
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Hopalong on May 29, 2006, 05:30:29 PM: Hi PP,
Well, in terms of faith (not religion)...sorry but I guess I can't stay completely away from this. And it DOES relate to healing from narcissism injuries, voice, etc. Anyway, I'm agnostic. Yet I still have the urge to pray. It was a conflict for a long time (sometimes still is). Because I don't want to be a hyprocrite. How could I legimately pray when I wasn't sure what or if I believed? Then one day I had a lightbulb moment.

I had spent so much energy sweating over the salutation (Dear, ummm, g-g-g...okay, no, well, umm, Dear Whom It May Con....nope, that's not right either, etc, etc, ad nauseum)--that I hadn't contemplated the action. What it is. I recognized that what it is, for me, is trusting. And I was burning out my optimisim in worrying about "who" to trust IN, and wasn't getting past that.

Then one day, I decided, just practice trusting. Just...trust. (No salutations, texts, etc., needed.)

Now I realize that I have forgotten lessons I had previously learned. This dialogue has been such an important reminder. Another way of thinking about it for me is, just speak. Don't worry about "fashioning" a prayer or supplication, etc. TO something or someone...just get to it. So then it would be something like: I ask for ____________. No "dear anybody", just I ask.

So that was probably my way of "setting my intention" but I didn't connect it up.

The risk is...trusting. The universe, life force, cosmos, etc. As you describe, Penny.
Thank you again.

Hops
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Jona22 on May 29, 2006, 06:17:34 PM: Hop

I have used this in my life over and over again. Jobs, homes, cars, more money, friends, vacations.

First you have to be clear as to what you want. If you want a new car picture in your mind the car you want--color, make, model, year. Just picturing a different car every time probably won't work or at least not as fast as picturing the exact car you want.

Then you declare to the universe that you intend to have it. Feel like you already have it--even if only for a few seconds. Imagine how you will feel when you have it. See it clearly in your mind--in the case of a car, you are in the driver's seat. Don't picture another person in the car. Picture yourself.

Hold this thought for a couple of minutes and then thank the universe for what you have received.

You must realize within yourself that you deserve the kind of job you want and the size of paycheck you want. This is true. You do deserve it. Your job is out there waiting for you to claim it. Some employer is out there complaining that you just can't get good help these days and is just wishing you would come along.

Decide the kind of work you want to do, how you want to do it, where you want to do it and how much you will be paid for it. Make it clear in your mind and declare your intention to have it. Also, declare that you deserve it. Hop, if there were only one good job out there it can be yours. (I think there are probably hundreds or more.)

The next step is to let it go and not think about it too much. If you think about it too much, negative thoughts begin to creep in. It is kind of like "Letting go and letting God." Let the universe do its work for you. You still must make job applications--you have to do your part. Just trust that the jobs you don't receive were not the right ones for you. It sometimes feels like you are being led by some higher power to be in the right place at the right time to receive what you want.

Now it is very important that you do not try to get something that someone else already has. Say there is a house in your town that you really, really want. It would be wrong to want that exact house. You could want a house just like it though. Also, only use this for something that will not harm someone else. This will not work to get a specific person to do what you want and for obvious reasons shouldn't be attempted.

Sometimes when I am intent on manifesting something in my life I get something that is sort of like what I wanted. If I keep on with my intention and keep vizualizing what I want, it eventually comes along. Be careful what you pray for.

The book someone mentioned "Creative Vizualization" is excellent and it is just a small book.

Now the question comes up--how long will it take? That depends on your clarity and your intention. Declare your intention two or three times a day. Say it out loud. Yell it when you are in your car and no one is looking and your windows are closed. The more manifesting you do, the faster things come to you. Also, I have noticed that if I am desperate for something--it takes longer. You just have to calm yourself down and have faith. Sometimes I just remind myself that Jesus said, "Ask and you shall receive." The key thing there is that you have to ask. Not beg. Not plead. Not say please. Just ask.

It is not for you to know how it will all come about. You cannot know. These things come about in the most unexpected ways.

When you have received what you want, be sure to say "Thank you." I like to do this at night outside, looking at the stars.
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: pennyplant on May 29, 2006, 07:21:01 PM: Quote from: Hopalong on May 29, 2006, 05:30:29 PM

just speak

Yes, that's it. For me the problem was the other half--understanding the language of the answers. And accepting them.

Trusting--that is risky. Perhaps you are getting ready to take that on.

PP
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: lightofheart on May 29, 2006, 10:48:48 PM: Hi Hops,

I'm sorry to have to rush here...it's good to read all these generous suggestions, and give you crossed fingers, collectively.

Maybe you've already heard this exercise, but it was a real lightbulber for me when someone relayed it at a gathering:

1) What are the three things you want the most in the world? Picture them.

2) Once you have them, how do you think you will feel? Try to answer as concretely as possible. 'I'll feel_____'

3) So you really want to feel_____. What do you think you can do--separate of these goals--that will help you feel____?

Forgot about this visualization, until...we were on the verge of losing our house. Boy do I relate to that fear, Hops! I was so terrified about this, and the idea it would be my fault (due to my surgery bills/inability to work for a time) that I froze, mentally. FEAR. Listened to Pema Chodrin, eventually got 10% less scared, then remembered the visualization above. Realized, for all the lovely feelings I attach to my house, I could be as happy any number of places, with much less. That little leap freed me up. Worked out a backup plan, approached my job search differently, felt serene during interviews, and was more accepting of love and support from others, rather than isolated by fear. Exercised my bum off, too, & spent all the time I could in the woods or at the beach, soaking up negative ions. The better I felt, the more my energy gravitated to positive outcomes--until I really couldn't picture anything less.

Hope some of this makes sense? imho, it is all about power, and you have all the strong & wonderful power you'll need, Hops.
I'm positive of that--can see your light from here. 8)

G'nights and best to all,
LoH
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Healing&Hopeful on May 30, 2006, 03:56:50 AM: Hiya Hoppy

I have a bit more time so thought I would expand on my previous post….

While I do believe that ask and you shall receive, and about visualisation techniques etc, I believe these are an aid and it is about your core belief system… believing that you are worthy of good things is a key to unlocking the good things if you like.

I’m going to use trying to get a new job because I feel it is easier to adapt this thinking to getting a new job, and because it is possibly a main relevant part of your life at the moment.

If you think, I am the best person for this job what’s your first thoughts… for me it was, what a conceited way to think, I’m thinking that I’m better than other people, that’s not a good thing to think…. But when I examined this more closely, I felt that actually no, I’m not saying I’m better than anyone else, just for this job I’m applying for I feel I’m the best person for it… I deserve a good job, and I can bring value to the company I’m applying for. If I was applying for something that was in a different sector, say nursing for example, I wouldn’t be the best person because I don’t have the training.

A job interview is a two way street…. It’s about the employer looking at if you have the right skills and experience (which they do from your CV which is why you get invited for an interview) and if they feel you would fit into their company, and for you it’s about seeing if you’d be happy working there, if you feel the job would suit you etc etc.

Once you genuinely feel you’re the best person for the job, instead of thinking I need this job otherwise I will lose my house, I won’t be able to do this, this and this…. Maybe try and think, I’m the best person for the job so all I need to do at this interview is show them I’m the best person for the job. Can you see yourself in the job? Can you see yourself doing well in the job? How do you show an employer that you’re the best person for the job? I feel it’s by showing them what you can bring to the role… giving examples of your current experience, of ways where you have added value to your previous roles, examples of where you have problem solved, how you problem solved, how you liaise with customers/clients/staff, areas where your ideas have changed a company for the better. You have a huge wealth of experience to draw on.

Another option is have you looked at the company you’re currently working for…. Are they recruiting in other areas of the business? Is there anything within your current company that you could apply for?

Another thing I wanted to share was this… I was chatting with a friend the other week. This is a very dear friend of mine, a lovely girl… and we were chatting about love, life etc, and she’s friends with many of her ex’s. Some of these people have treated her appallingly in my opinion and she’s still friends with them. She was supposed to move to America to be with this guy and then he dumped her a month before she was due to go, and she still talks to him about him and his new girlfriend, giving him advice etc. She said to me that life was too short to hold grudges, but I said I felt it wasn’t about holding a grudge, it was why should I spend my time still being friends with someone who obviously didn’t want to be with me? Obviously not everything is as black and white as this, but I do feel it is still a big key. Years ago I was with this guy for 3 years… loved him dearly and he broke my heart. He split up with me 3 days before Christmas, and while it was hard, it was also timing wise one of the best because I thought, “no one splits up with someone 3 days before Christmas unless they really mean it.” (and believe me this thought when round and round my head for quite a few months!) So when he got in touch 6 weeks later, this thought kept me going and kept me strong enough to defend myself if you like…. So I didn’t go back….

Gosh, I hope this doesn’t come across like I’m trying to tell you what to think Hops hon, because that isn’t my intention at all. When I was going through things with bio dad, one of the questions I asked him was “how does your belief system help you to grow throughout life?”. And I asked this question to myself too and shared the answer with him with examples… however his response was that his belief system did help him because of something which happened which he never did share with me, even though I asked him a few times if he would. I’m not saying share the answer as it’s a very personal question, but I do feel a good question to ask yourself.

My two cents anyway, and maybe some food for thought.

Take care

Love H&H xx
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Hopalong on May 30, 2006, 06:55:41 AM: PP, this is lovely:
Quote
my life is an equal participant in a universe that has a certain rhythm, rhyme, and reason

and Jac, thank you for those beautiful verses. It brings back what I loved about the bible.

I am taking all of these wonderful posts to work and will read them several times today. I'll order the books, and try the exercises out loud.

When you say, declare your intention, I guess that is:
I will have _____________, I will find _____________ ...like that?

love\
Hops
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Portia on May 30, 2006, 07:12:52 AM: Hi Hops shall I read Victor Frankl - Man's Search for Meaning? Seriously. Or shall I carry on getting to my own conclusions through trial, error and good old fashioned thinking for myself? I love books but I haven’t read that. I find I often have theories or ideas that are in books, but unless I get there myself it’s not the same. Back up plan – one in mind? If you haven’t got one in mind, that will sustain fear I think. Just having a plan is a safeguard, frees your mind to concentrate on the now. If you put off thinking about a back up plan, you might be driven by fear and not by all the good stuff. Getting what you want requires concentration, belief and darn hard work. There is no easy way around doing the hard work. If there is an easier way, it’s enjoying what you’re doing. “Okay if all else fails we won’t exactly be destitute and living on the street, so that’s secure. Now what can I do to really get this moving and throw my whole mind into getting that very focussed objective?” ha, I’m self-talking here….and it’s starting to work! thanks Hops.
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Jona22 on May 30, 2006, 08:32:53 AM: Hop,

When declaring your intention don't say, "I will have _______!" This will hold it off just around the corner. You just can't quite reach it. It's there but it is always in the future.

Say, "I now have __________!" It may feel silly at first. When you say it lots of negative thoughts will come up. Those negative thoughts are actually what keeps you from receiving. The more you say it the more you believe it. Eventually you will feel a kind of "click" and you know that what you desire is yours and is not very far away. At this point I always put it out of my mind for a while. That is when it comes to me.

I had the most amazing experience a year ago last January. My husband and I were looking for a house to buy. We searched all over England and Wales. In Wales I saw a house that I instantly wanted but it wasn't for sale. It was an old white English cottage with black trim and a slate roof. I kept this picture in my mind.

A few weeks later we visited another area of England. We spent three days looking at houses and we headed home feeling quite disappointed. On our way home we had to take a detour. I thought, "Oh good. Maybe our house is on this detour." I kept my eyes open for "for sale" signs but didn't see anything. When we were back on the main road I stopped thinking about it. About five miles later I spotted a white cottage with black trim with a for sale sign in front of it. We turned around and went back and walked around it. We couldn't see in because the drapes were closed. We both thought it was beyond our budget but my husband called the estate agent anyway. The asking price was exactly what we wanted to pay. An agent came over and showed us the house. We then went back home and called the next day and made an offer.

I am sitting in the dining room of that cottage right now. I could have so easily missed seeing the for sale sign. We were going 50 miles an hour and I glanced back and just got a flash of a white cottage and a for sale sign.

Do an experiment. Think of pigs. Picture a pig in your mind. Say pig to yourself over and over. You will find that you see pigs everywhere you go.
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: lightofheart on May 30, 2006, 10:09:29 PM: Hi Everyone,

Hops, heavens do I want to thank you again for starting this thread. Really, I've no words to express it.

Like others on Intention, I don't much believe in accidents. imho, the learning comes exactly when it's due...

Today, on my way out the door, my boss ambushed me and announced--open door, so nastily it actually took my breath away--that he plans to eliminate my job and create a new one he knows I'd never take, giving me less than a month to find work elsewhere. And I sat there, shocked, because (though I don't respect him or see much humanity in this man) it's been so long since I've lived with my father, I forgot what it's like to be sitting two feet from a person who feels bigger for whatever hurt he sees in my eyes.

Waited all the way home to cry. One dinner, ice cream, two walks, many hugs & a game of fetch later, re-read this whole thread...and felt so humbled by all you giving folks who tossed out lifelines. THANKS; tears of gratitude feel a whole lot better!

peace, good people

LoH
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Hopalong on May 30, 2006, 10:27:47 PM: LoH,
I am SO sorry about your job, I know what a fearful shock it is.

Maybe we both can take everything that comes to this thread from our amazing friends here to heart, and really find a way to manifest the change (and security) we both need so urgently.

I hope you will take at least several days to be very, very kind to yourself. Then your mind can clear and you can start looking.

I hope in the long view, looking back, something wonderful will work out for you and you'll look back in gladness that you no longer work for that man.

(((((((((LoH))))))))))
I do understand what you're going through.

Hops
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: lightofheart on May 31, 2006, 06:43:40 AM: Morning Hops,

Aww, thanks for the hug (my 1st here) it means a lot. Such a gift you give. (((((((((Hops))))))))))

Maybe we both can take everything that comes to this thread from our amazing friends here to heart, and really find a way to manifest the change (and security) we both need so urgently.

That's a fab plan you suggest. The feeling of security goes much deeper than jobs or houses themselves, doesn't it? There are so many self-worth questions and core-changing emotions interwoven in a job search or feelings of HOME. You say it so well here: manifest change and urgent needs. I feel a lot of power in your words, Hops, and more resolved just for reading this. Thanks.

I really think everything happens for a reason, that good can be plumbed from most pain. Have you ever heard the adage Luck equals Preparation meets Opportunity? imho, even ugliness can help prepare me for the next opportunity. So I'm more grateful than worried. Good timing? I work one more day this week and have 3 birthday parties between now and Sun., starting today. And for all the hatefulness he radiates, my boss has no power over me, or how I feel about anything. He's just a very loud truck I have to pass.

Thanks for your understanding, Hops, it's a gift. I think I understand what you're going through, too. This house is the first place that's felt like home to me since I was eight (had no memory of how security felt). It's the safest, most loving place in the world, surrounded by rolling hills and my mother's irises. Your home is just as close to your heart, I bet. Well worth striving to keep.

Power for your journey, Hops. And thanks to all for the sharing here.

LoH
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Jona22 on May 31, 2006, 06:59:42 AM: L of H

Losing a job, especially in the way you did, is a real shock. I am sorry this has happened to you.

I think Hop is right. Take a few days, a week to just process what has happened to you and clear your mind. I know from experience that rushing out right away and applying for jobs left and right in the first few days has been a waste of time. I don't think even declaring your intention to have a new, wonderful, better job would work in the first few days.

This almost exactly same thing just happened to my son. I am going to tell you what I told him. This is a blessing in disguise. It still feels rotten and scary.

Just know in your heart, in your deepest self, that there is a wonderful, better job for you and that it will come to you. You will end up in a better place.

I think sometimes things like this happen to jar us lose from something that no longer suits us and sends us on to something much better. We usually don't recognize it at the time it is happening.
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: 28Qs on May 31, 2006, 07:08:54 AM: Absolutely a newbie,
Just registered,
Got kicked out of another site..for beiing intoxicated while I post..then maybe I am a man..then maybe my way of communicating is different...then on the other hand maybe the members are too fixed in their ways..
Chanced upon here, curious what this site is all about?..
Myself doing NC with sincereity..a relationship of 3 years..
Thinks I understand most of it..still having a hard tiime..

Would appreciate if someone says welcome..appreciate just reading a few posts and the feeliing of it..

28Qs
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Portia on May 31, 2006, 10:03:38 AM: Hello 28Qs (28 questions?), welcome

This site used to have a sub-heading:
“A forum to discuss your experiences with Voicelessness and emotional survival”

does that help? I think Dr G’s essays explain it pretty well too.

Is NC - no contact? Do you mean with your relationship of 3 years?

Here’s a tip though: it might be a good idea to start your own thread (click on New Topic, right hand, middle, second button in). You’re in someone’s thread here and you might get more welcomes and replies on your own thread. (You can take my question there if you wish.)
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Hopalong on May 31, 2006, 01:14:38 PM: LoH,
Thank you so very much for understanding this:
Quote
This house is the first place that's felt like home to me since I was eight (had no memory of how security felt). It's the safest, most loving place in the world, surrounded by rolling hills and my mother's irises. Your home is just as close to your heart, I bet. Well worth striving to keep.

In my case, it's the memory of my kind great-uncle (a grandfather to me), an architect, and my father (sweet, dear anti-N) sitting at the dining room table working on the plans together in 1963. GreatUncle lived with us for six months until the plans were done and building well underway. In more recent life NMom has dominated this space, but if I am able to stay here after she is gone (which hinges on employment)...I will reclaim those happier memories and reinhabit it with love, celebration, happy gatherings, art, and a simpler aesthetic than her infernal kitsch and clutter collection!

Hops
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: IamNewtoMe on May 31, 2006, 01:53:25 PM: Hi all,

I really like this thread, though I am so sorry to hear of Hopalong's and LightofHeart's job worries.

There is so much wisdom on this thread! I wish I had something productive to contribute, but I am so new to this. I am learning a lot!

One thing I thought of when reading your posts is something a friend and co-worker once said to me. This guy was a rough-around the edges, motorcycle-riding, sort of philosopher (Bean - I have no doubt he had read Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance!) One day I was particularly worried about messing something up on the job. We were working together and came up with a solution to the problem we were working on. Before we forged ahead, he signed and said "Well, even if we do mess up, ain't no babies gonna die!" It was kind of a dark sentiment, but it made me laugh. It put things into perspective. Similar to Portia's question (what's the worst that could happen?). Nothing we did would cause the worst thing imaginable. And he was right. Sometimes when I get stressed out about something I am trying to do, I tell myself that.
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: lightofheart on May 31, 2006, 08:46:14 PM: Hi there, Folks of Intention,

Thanks for your good thoughts, IamNewtoMe, and Welcome 28Qs

Jona, thank you, it's good to know your found your cottage...am running wild with your advice & picturing pigs. Best to your son as well (imho, you're right, it is a blessing when people who can't appreciate us, in whatever setting, let us go. And vice versa).

Oh, Hops,

This is just beautiful:

Quote
In my case, it's the memory of my kind great-uncle (a grandfather to me), an architect, and my father (sweet, dear anti-N) sitting at the dining room table working on the plans together in 1963. GreatUncle lived with us for six months until the plans were done and building well underway...I will reclaim those happier memories and reinhabit it with love, celebration, happy gatherings, art, and a simpler aesthetic than her infernal kitsch and clutter collection!
[/color]

Would you consider telling us more about your house? It sounds like there's just so much more on the tip of your tongue, a wealth of pictures. Maybe you've lived most of your life there? So far as intention goes, the way you see yourself reclaiming it is as moving as anything I've read here...can see the grain of the dining room table under their hands, the curl of a blueprint. Thank you for that.

God, if it could be bottled. What could be stronger than family love ties cemented to the place you know for your own true home?

I hope you understood, in my 1st post, that I wasn't suggesting you should let go, Hops--just mapping one little road to optimism. I think you get how hard it was to even voice the idea of selling (among other ties, the dog of my life is buried here; called a lawyer friend, sobbing, to see if we could get grave visitation written into a sale contract). But there was a palpable, purposeful change that minute I accepted it might have to be. I wasn't any less determined to fight for this place; only something shifted, and I saw very clearly that it would take every ounce of positive focus I had, or even aspired to have, to make it work, to realize my intention.

That's why I feel so sure this is all going to work out for you, Hops: because you have that clear, burning need of a good heart to keep your own peace there. That job is yours...you just haven't found it yet. imho, we're all with you, if that counts for anything.

Please take good care of Hops. No, the best care.

LoH

PS - Infernal Kitsch would make an excellent band name, imo. What do you think?
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Hopalong on June 01, 2006, 12:46:41 AM: Thanks so much, LoH...that's tremendous understanding and support you offer.
The house has pleasing proportions, a lovely back yard with a mix of mature hardwoods.
It's in an ordinary neighborhood...it's just not ordinary to me.

I think I won't rhapsodize too much though, as I don't want to build up expectations. I HAVE been stating my intention, though, thanks to all of you who showed me how. Been doing it several times a day and it feels GOOD.

Despite NMom, after my divorce and my dad's death, it was good to come back here.
I have friends and community here too, which doubles my determination to stay in this town.

Hops
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Portia on June 01, 2006, 05:09:36 AM: Infernal Kitsch 8) – open a shop in that name and my mother will be the first and biggest customer. I love it! Thanks LoH.

Hops, the thing I’m thinking is: you need a certain job so that you have enough money so that when your mom dies you’ll be able to buy out your brother’s share of the house? I don’t know. If this is the case, is the amount of cash and the constant worry worth it? I realise you have a wealth of love and memories and good associations tied up with the house. I understand that, I think, it’s your base and your rock.

What if you can’t achieve it? Can you take your cash and buy somewhere smaller close by? Can you afford to stay close to your friends and in the same neighbourhood? Maybe there’s a wee house waiting for you somewhere?

The happiest times of my life were spent at my grandparents’ home and at another house in my adult years. Both those buildings have undergone massive change over the years (one has been totally rebuilt, the other substantially changed). Change is okay. The thing is, they are buildings, they’ll be around in one shape or another (as bricks, wood or dust) long after we’ve all gone. The memories and associations are in our heads and they’ll stay there.

I read this Hops ‘as I don't want to build up expectations’ and I thought maybe you don’t expect this to happen, maybe you’d rather change and move on but it’s scary to imagine? Having new choices and alternatives is scary, freedom is scary to me! I don’t know. Growth, change, new vistas, possibilities etc.

?

PS edit in

I was just thinking….is it also tied up with duty, responsibility, guilt…in some way. I don’t think anyone is responsible for maintaining a Family History? I think we’re responsible for living our own lives. We don’t have to pay respect or regard to those who are dead; we have to live *now*, with our knowledge, experience and history in our head. What do you think Hops?
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Jona22 on June 01, 2006, 06:10:53 AM: A psychic once told me that sometimes decisions have to be made when we don't want to make them and the universe has a way of forcing us to do so. This was said during a conversation about me having to sell my beloved house.

Twice I have had to do this with homes that I intended to stay in for the rest of my life. With the first one, I cried a lot and became depressed over it. I didn't want to leave the community I was in and ended up buying a smaller house in that community. I also loved this little cottage type house and thought I would stay there for the rest of my life. One by one all of my friends moved away. The community was changing and it wasn't changing in a good way. Then it became apparent that I was going to have to find a different job. I had a new boss and she was either a psychopath or a narcissist--I am not sure which. Did I look for another job? No, I clung to it with desperation. I had worked there for seven years and most of the employees had been there longer than I. One by one they all quit. Most of them didn't even give notice. I felt like I was living in the twilight zone. Then one day my new boss called me into her office and spent 20 minutes ranting and raving about what an awful job I was doing. Everytime I said something she accused me of criticizing her. I made my decision in a split second. Without saying anything to her, I stood up and walked out of her office. She followed me part way down the hall screaming at me. I went into my office, picked up the two things in there that I wanted to keep and then went to my car. I drove home and never went back.

There is no unemployment compensation when you walk off a job. I had about $4000 in the bank. My boyfriend at the time told me I needed to go back to the public schools. I sobbed that there were no jobs in public schools in my subject area. I knew there weren't because I had been looking for a long time. After he left, I dug out the Sunday paper and looked in the want ads. I did it just to prove to myself that I was right--there were no jobs in my field. Well, my eyes must have bugged out because about the fifth ad down was a job asking for my exact qualifications. It was in a community about a two hour drive away from where I was living.

I got the job and my salary was $13,000 more a year than what I had been making. It turned out that the principal and I had attended university together and had taken many classes together.

OK, I had to sell another house that I wanted to keep. But I ended up with a much nicer, bigger house that I also loved just as much as the others.

My point in telling all of this is that sometimes we try very hard to hang on to something that we have our hearts set on and that we want to keep forever. We tightly close our fist around it and just won't let go even when things are becoming very difficult. But there is something better for us out there that the universe wants to give us.
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Portia on June 01, 2006, 06:44:48 AM: Wow Jona, inspiring, truly! :D

That moment when we ‘snap’, when you turned, got your stuff and left the job, aren’t those moments…momentous? I stayed too long in a job too but the leaving was wonderful. And yes, when change happens, it’s not as bad as I thought it might be. We can make plans, try to control the outcomes, enforce order on the chaotic world - and things have a way of not doing what we want; I guess embracing those possibilities as opportunities for change, growth…

But….why are so many bosses psychotic? :?
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Healing&Hopeful on June 01, 2006, 07:09:39 AM: (((((((Hops)))))))) & (((((((((((LoH)))))))))))

I hope you both find well deserving and rewarding jobs shortly...

Jona.... loved your post.....

Hugs

H&H xx
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Jona22 on June 01, 2006, 07:30:15 AM: Portia,

I think many N's are very successful in business. The large corporation today doesn't have consideration of the human or humane factor. It all comes down to the money. Often the most successful people, and by successful I mean those making big money, got where they are with little thought as to how it might affect people. Many come across as very charming people but on the inside is a hard, hollow core.

The boss that I was talking about was that way but she tried to manage by manipulation. She almost destroyed that business. She was fired a year later in the most deserving way. Her replacement walked into her office and announced that she was fired and that it was now his office. I would have loved to have been a fly on the wall to see the expression on her face. I don't think he was successful either. The business has been sold.
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Jona22 on June 01, 2006, 08:00:50 AM: Another good book on this subject is "Creating Money: Keys to Abundance" by Sanaya Roman. It is written with a New Age point of view which may put some off but the message is good.

Another excellent book is "Your Best Life Now, Seven Steps to Living at Your Full Potential" by Joel Osteen. This one is written from the Christian point of view with many Bible quotes. I think it is time for me to read this one again.
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Jona22 on June 01, 2006, 08:09:35 AM: I think one thing that can hold people back is the belief that money is evil. Money isn't bad in itself. It just is. Money is used in both good and evil ways--it is the user that makes the difference.

Take a dollar bill out of your pocket, or a pound coin, and think about how many times that same unit of money has been earned and passed on in payment of goods and services. No one really owns that bill or coin. Even if it is put in the bank, that bill or coin is put back into circulation. I guess you could bury it in the ground and then say you owned it. But doing that stops the circulation doesn't it?
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Hops on June 01, 2006, 02:09:41 PM: Hi Portia,
My goal is to stay because I like it, it comforts me, and if it is going to be possible, I'd like very much to also pass it on one day to my daughter, as it was the only stable place of her childhood (I moved her around a bit and she went through my 2 divorces as well as her Dad's divorce and remarriage and death).

If it is not going to be possible ($$$), then yes, I would accept reality, sell it and buy something smaller, and become happy there. The odd thing is, smaller houses in this area cost only a bit less than this one would...it's an insane real estate market here. The town has been several times declared among the "nicest small cities to live in in the US" by national publications, so it's overrun with wealthy yuppies and retirees, a few actors, etc. There is minimal affordable housing for working class or lower middleclass people, a serious local crisis.

NMom toyed with me for years about how I'd have to "buy out my brother's half" which is, trust me, impossible. (She ignored the market, the realities of local housing, because the power she held was more interesting to her. She manipulated me over it for a long time, and while I took constant care of her she also charged me rent for several years. I quit paying rent when a friend wrote me, "you twit, you're an au pair who's paying for the privilege!" Finally, I got mad and told her whatever she decided was fine but I needed her to stop toying with me about it. Eventually, she said to me after her 5th hospitalization and recovery at home with me emptying her chest drains, running up and down the stairs with trays--she had many urgent needs, such as "bring me the crossword"--and working 40-50 hours and my back in agony..."I believe after this that it is the right thing to leave you the house.")

So, NMom is leaving me the building, the piano and her engagement ring that was my Dad's mother's (that's all I want), and she's leaving my Nbrother all the contents, which is worth about 1/4 of her estate. Her will is on file. Brother comes to visit once or twice a year but has not taken care of her at all .... I took care of both of them, lived close for years while he was across the country, saw my Dad through his final illness, and have spent almost 8 years now with her. And dammit, it IS fair.)

There is a mortgage on it, so I will need to get a mortgage when she passes away. (But my payments to stay here would be less than to buy elsewhere--if I sold and bought a different house straight out, I'd have nothing to retire on, since I woke up to that need too late.) That's pretty much it. There's also a section that would be easy to rent out to some nice person.

I'm not looking for alternative housing unless I have to, and I'm not at that place yet. I do know it's a possibility things will turn out that way, but for now, I have decided not to focus on that, because it distracts me from my focus and my goal. (And I don't want to relive all the stress and trauma that led up to this thank-god-now-peaceful resolution. I ain't pickin' at it no' mo'.)

hugs,
Hops
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Hop guest on June 01, 2006, 02:23:26 PM: Hi Jona,
Thanks for your post. That's a wonderful story...I'm so glad that worked out for you! Wonderful synchronicity with you and the principal...amazing.

Several people have advised me over the years to "let it go". I will if I must. But for now, it is not necessary. I still live there. And horrid as it is to infer...Mom is 95. This limbo won't last forever.

It's a sore point...some people in my life don't see that caring a lot about the house doesn't mean that I will cripple myself with grief if things don't work out. I won't.

In case anybody wonders why I don't move to a cheaper city it's because I have friends and deep roots here and don't want to move away. This is my community, and I really do love it. So whatever is going to work out for me will work out here. That sets limits on things but that's okay. At 56, I crave a simpler life anyway. I'll shed a lot of "stuff" and take joy in painting, etc....wherever I stay, whenever I know I am staying somewhere.

Okay, now I don't wanna talk about the house any more because I am busy setting my intention about the new wonderful job!! :D This is about my positive intentions, not my fears.

Yay!
Hops
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: moonlight52 on June 01, 2006, 04:04:21 PM: HI HOPS AND IoH , I am sure the jobs you wish for will be .It is so. Thats how MuM Scorpion process works.Love and intention .Hops
I will let you know how my love intention process is going.I have stopped beating myself up not from telling n dad off that would
give him comfort and thats not who I am .I do pity him and sent him a letter saying that I was sure he did not mean to confuse me
in regard to his estate whether or not not he loves me .I told him I know he loves me .And I am sure a part of him does.I HAVE been set free I am free .I feel like the real me I ALWAYS WAS underneath his ick IS NOW REAL.I wish him well .My gift ,OH I do like me I do think I AM NICE IS THAT OK TO SAY ? I really get to feel this way.My life is mine now .
PS He must be feeling conflicted .I do not care .May be he should feel bad.
I HAVE MY OWN TRUE SONG AND HE HAS NO MORE BULLETS LEFT WITH MY NAME ON IT.
THAT'S THE UNIVERSE WRAPPING UP IT'S ARMS AROUND ME.
Finally he can not hurt me ever again I WILL NOT PERMIT IT. A very kind but not self destructive Moon
Moonlight
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Portia on June 01, 2006, 04:05:57 PM: Hi Hops, I’m sorry for asking those questions and reading your reply, I think you worked so hard to answer me when you could have told me P, there are reasons I want to do this and this. Feels like I put you on the spot and also I bet you might have said all this already and I haven’t read it. Also mentioning your brother can’t have helped…bugger. Sorry I got you picking at sore spots.

Thinking about getting the universe to help you now. You said: I quit paying rent when a friend wrote me – I like the sound of this friend! Are you still in touch? She’s practical, might spark something around the job area, might spark positive thoughts, creativity?

I don’t think it’s horrid at all to think about death, it’s practical, especially at your mom’s age, truly.

Could you get remote work for an organisation not in your area? Try all the similar organisations in an ever-increasing radius, see if they want wordsmiths working via the ether? I’m thinking you have specific skills that must be in demand, it’s just locating who has the need (maybe more than one?). Daft idea, already done it? Come on universe, give Hops a break please :D.
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: moonlight52 on June 01, 2006, 04:13:16 PM: LOVE AND THE UNIVERSE INTENTION
It is a prayer to the all that is the isness not in the asking but in total faith that it is so and so it is so
your job HOPS
your jop LoH
and so it is

BLESSINGS BE TRUE LOVES HEART
Moon
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Hopalong on June 01, 2006, 04:43:50 PM: Bless ya, P, don't worry.
I think what I'm trying to do on this thread (just in my own posts--don't mind one bit for anybody else to go anywhere they like on a thread I start)...is stay focused on positives.

So just on this one, for now, I'm not so much needing advice or questions on practical specifics on the house or hunt...I want to just open up inside myself that whole notion of positive intention and the universe, and help myself to focus there.

(I noticed when I faced your questions about the house, I allowed myself to get quite anxious and defensive, and went iinto a long inner debate I'd rather let go of.) I let myself go there, though, P. I hadda choice!

So since I do have a long list of steps I know I can take on the job hunt, do you mind if I don't answer your specific questions about it? I know they're asked in a desire to help, though dearie. Thank you!

Here comes a BIG one (get ready, girl)...(((((((((((((((((((((((((Portia)))))))))))))))))))))))))))

Hops
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Hopalong on June 01, 2006, 04:52:02 PM: Moon, hon:

:D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :

YAY for YOU!

(Yeah, it's okay, silly...)

:P

Hops
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Sela on June 01, 2006, 05:58:11 PM: Hi Hoppy:

Don't know if it's been mentioned but relaxing somewhere quiet, clearing your mind completely, breathing deeply and then picturing yourself.........AT.......your goal (which is having a decent paying job that you enjoy?)......in as much detail as you possibly can...
for a minimum of 20 min per day.... can really help one to get there.

Thinking positive thoughts..........."this will happen", ....etc, while doing this will reinforce the whole "vision".
And while in this relaxed state......seeing yourself doing what you want.....allow yourself to feel good, positive energy flowing all around you and in you, good feelings, white light, everything soothing and pleasant......helps create the "magic".

It reduces stress. Is used to manage pain.
Helps to balance the mind -- thoughts/emotions.
Gets one focussed.
Has been called "magnetic" (good attracts/draws good)

Here's a link with some info.

http://www.successconsciousness.com/index_00000e.htm (http://www.successconsciousness.com/index_00000e.htm)

Sela
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: lightofheart on June 01, 2006, 06:35:32 PM: Hi Hops,

I apologize a million times over if someone's already tossed this out there, intention-wise. Hate posting in a rush, but:

Do you know anyone who's ever created a Positive Expectations Treasure Map?

This is a Feng Shui activity but I know a lot of people not gung-ho for Feng Shui (yes, this punny's for you, Hops) who swear by them. It's simple, and you've already done the hardest part, which is deciding on your goal(s), then visualizing and/or stating them to make them more real. To make a Treasure Map, you just find beautiful pictures, photos from brochures, magazines, and words that help you see your intention positively and concretely. You can use a bulletin board, make a poster, etc. The important part would be to hang it in a place of prominence and give it (and your intention) your focus and energy by looking at it daily. There's a great illustration of this in The Healthy House Book, by Gina Lazenby, among other places, which says, "Don't focus on how your goal will be achieved--just focus on what you want and let magical things start to happen."

I have a treasure map, right near my computer (I'm a writer, so spend much time here). And feel positive every time I look at it.

Also, this may be way out here (yes, I'm a hippie, thanks very much), BUT, whenever I'm going through something big, emotionally, or intent on focusing my energy, I harmonize/cleanse my house, burn sage, shift the energy, talk to the spirits, and can feel the difference. Once I got so wrapped up in this I set my slippers on fire and the smoke detectors went off, but that's another story...

Sorry to have to run, but gosh knows you have no end of info coming your way. Can hear you standing up for your own positivity here, a beautiful hint of steel in your voice, which is surely serving you well. Yay Hops!

LoH

PS - Thanks for the good thoughts, Moon and H&H; hugs to you. :D
PSS edit in - just finished this & looked out my study window: enormous double rainbow; must've arisen from all the good intent.
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Hopalong on June 01, 2006, 06:38:19 PM: Thanks, Sela.
Good feelings just from reading that.
It reminds me of how I've felt when I've done hypnosis periodically with my T.
Very lovely, clear feeling to get in touch with my deep inner self that's...on my own side. I
have tapped into that space...just need to do it again.

I WILL.

Thanks again!
Hops
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Hopalong on June 01, 2006, 07:33:51 PM: LOL number 2! :lol:

Setting the spirits right with the Burning Slippers Ceremony... :lol: (gasp)

Whew. Okay, now I'll try to take it seriou....ooops! :lol:

Ahh. Ahem. Now. Okay, lemme find my Feng Shwippers... Oops,, sorry.... :lol:

LoH, thank you. (I actually love the notion of you wholeheartedly giving yourself to this...and I love the idea of the treasure map image. I can do that!)

Hops
PS--hope I didn't overdo the laughy faces so you'd feel mocked...was just having fun w/it! Goofy images sometimes really set me off...(((LoH))) I do appreciate the love and hopefulness of your ideas and I'm going to take that IN.
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Jona22 on June 01, 2006, 07:44:56 PM: That treasure map is a great idea!!!! I think I will do that.

I have burned sage but I didn't set my slippers on fire!!!!! :lol:
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Sela on June 01, 2006, 08:37:49 PM: Hey Hops:

Yep. That's basically hypnosis.....some call it relaxation excercises and visualization techniques.....whatever.
Some mention "positive energy" or not.
Thing is........it's just a way of centering, allowing oneself to come to the most peaceful state and concentrating, plus.........drawing, asking whatever positive forces be......in. One could also pray, in this state, and some have had ......extra sensory experiences (or whatnot).

It's not necessary to have a T or anyone to help but it's great that you've done it with one before because maybe the whole thing won't seem so foreign and out there......as it might, at first, for some who've never done anything like it.

Go for it, Hops! Why not?

Just don't set anything on fire. :lol:

Sela
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: lightofheart on June 01, 2006, 10:35:26 PM: Hops,

How could I possibly begrudge a woman who would share the fuchsia hair story a chortle over my burning slippers? No one laughed harder than I did when I finally noticed it wasn't just chary sage I smelled (shocked you didn't milk this for a hot foot pun, btw).

Quote
Ahh. Ahem. Now. Okay, lemme find my Feng Shwippers... Oops,, sorry.... Laughing
[/color]
Well, the truth is you're not sorry, Hops, are you? Nope, don't smell sorry. I live with a punner, am sister to another, and must say, with great affection, y'all are a sly, unrepentant, lurking bunch. The rest of us just babble on, setting the ball up for the spike, as it were, then...bam, the pun is dropped. No one snickers so well as the Punner in their element. Feng Schwippers. Goodness.

And bless you, Jona, for standing with me in this time of mockery...always glad to know there's another sage-ist in the house.

Sweet dreams to all,

:lol:
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Portia on June 02, 2006, 08:07:17 AM: Hiya Hops,

Duh, doh-ho, dumpty doo. I don’t what I’m talking about here so I shall ungracefully say: sorry Hops, not my bag and that’s obvious and I didn’t realise it…

do you mind if I don't answer your specific questions about it?

Good grief no! I’d be happier if you’d said: ‘hey P, nose out, you don’t know what you’re talking about babe, thanks for the input but I ain’t going there!’ haha. I’d go: ‘oh, okay {drags feet}…bye…’.

Do I mind, heck no, I don’t mind, I’m waaaaaaaaaaaayyyyy out of my depth/realm/experience here and glad to say so – thanks for releasing me! :D

((((((((((((((((((((((((Hops)))))))))))))))))))))))))))

{adjusts eye-mask 8), mounts trusty steed, heads for the hills, sound of receding horse hooves...}
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Jona22 on June 02, 2006, 09:35:39 AM: This is getting freaky. Three times, twice yesterday I have tried to post to Hop and all three times I have lost my post. I am beginning to think I am not supposed to post this.

So this time I am going to try to sneak it through in a very short message without any other explanation.

Hop, in my examples above, I was not advising you to give up your house. I used houses and jobs as examples only because I have had my most striking experience with those.
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Healing&Hopeful on June 02, 2006, 11:00:48 AM: Hiya all... I was sent this over email and I felt it belonged here....

A great note for all to read it will take just 37 seconds to read this and change your thinking

Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room. One man was allowed to sit up in his bed for an hour each afternoon to help drain the fluid from his lungs. His bed was next to the room's only window. The other man had to spend all his time flat on his back. The men talked for hours on end. They spoke of their wives and families, their homes, their jobs, their involvement in the military service, where they had been on vacation.

Every afternoon when the man in the bed by the wind! ow could sit up, he would pass the time by describing to his roommate all the things he could see outside the window.

The man in the other bed began to live for those one hour periods where his world would be broadened and enlivened by all the activity and color of the world outside.

The window overlooked a park with a lovely lake. Ducks and swans played on the water while children sailed their model boats. Young lovers walked arm in arm amidst flowers of every color and a fine view of the city skyline could be seen in the distance.

As the man by the window described all this in exquisite detail, the man on the other side of the room would close his eyes and imagine the picturesque scene.

One warm afternoon the man by the window described a parade passing by.

Although the other man couldn't hear the band - he could see it. In his mind's eye as the gentleman by the window portrayed it with descriptive words.

Days and weeks passed.

One morning, the day nurse arrived to bring water for their baths only to find the lifeless body of the man by the window, who had died peacefully in his sleep. She was saddened and called the hospital attendants to take the body away.

As soon as it seemed appropriate, the other man as! ked if he could be moved next to the window. The nurse was happy to ma ke the switch, and after making sure he was comfortable, she left him alone.

Slowly, painfully, he propped himself up on one elbow to take his first look at the real world outside.

He strained to slowly turn to look out the window beside the bed.

It faced a blank wall. The man asked the nurse what could have compelled his deceased roommate who had described such wonderful things outside this window

The nurse responded that the man was blind and could not even see the wall

She said, "Perhaps he just wanted to encourage you."

Epilogue:

There is tremendous happiness in making others happy, despite our own situations.

Shared grief is half the sorrow, but happiness when shared, is doubled.

If you want to feel rich, just count all the things you have that money can't buy.

"Today is a gift, that's w! hy it is called the present."

The origin of this letter is unknown, but it brings good luck to everyone who passes it on.

The greatest happiness in life is
the conviction that we are loved
- loved for ourselves, or rather,
loved in spite of ourselves.

- Victor Hugo
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Hopalong on June 02, 2006, 04:08:03 PM: Thanks, (((((((Sela))))))))))!
Thanks, ((((((((LoH))))))))))!
Thanks, ((((((((Portia)))))))))!
Thanks, ((((((((Moon)))))))))!
Thanks, ((((((((Jona))))))))))!
Thanks, ((((((((H&H))))))))))!

(After typing all those thanks, I've having a sensation that this is what the intention, the white light, and the sage smudge are all filled with -- thanks.)

Hops
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Hopalong on June 02, 2006, 04:43:24 PM: I think I'm on the wrong thread but anyway,
you're welcome, Brigid!

:)
Hops
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Hopalong on June 06, 2006, 12:40:07 AM: I'm trying, daily, to hold up my positive intention, but
sometimes the fear has me paralysed. I've done some,
but nowhere near enough, to search out a new job.
The deadline is bearing down (end of June) and if
I don't have another spot within this system by then,
I lose a host of benefits...anyway, the details don't
matter but the ramifications for my life are big.

Don't so much need practical what to dos, but more...
how to keep going. Not lose my focus or my faith.
I slide backward into not-doing, not trying enough.

I'm just scared.

Hops
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: moonlight52 on June 06, 2006, 01:44:00 AM: Hops leave room for all the goodness you SO deserve and let the fear be very very small
Hugs
Moon
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Jona22 on June 06, 2006, 05:28:08 AM: Hop

First of all. I have felt the way you are feeling before. I know that paralyzed feeling.

Could it be that you are trying to use your own power instead of the power of the universe? By this I mean believing that you have to do it all yourself. If you can get quiet in your mind, you will be able to tap into the guidance of the universe. This allows you to achieve more by doing less. STOP thinking that you haven't done or are not doing enough. STOP thinking about the consequences of what will happen if you don't have a job by the end of June. Yes, I know these consequences are real and not what you want but there is an answer to every problem. There is a way out of every problem. You don't know how it is going to happen but the universe will take care of you. The universe sometimes has its own timetable and later when you look back you will see that it actually worked out better.

It is possible to overdo the focus on what you want. This can cause you to feel overwhelmed and fearful. I suggest that you let up a little bit. Release it for a day or two to get your mind calmed down. Going on that motorcycle ride was really good for you. Do some other activities that can distract you for a bit. Go to a good movie. Do things that will keep your mind occupied with something other than finding a job or declaring your intention. This is not going into denial. It is taking a rest.

With your mind calmed down you will be better able to focus on what you need to do. When you least expect it, you will find the right job to apply for, have an interview, be hired and start your new job.

You have the perfect job for perfect pay.
You do a wonderful service in a wonderful way.

Change the "you" to "I" and say this as an affirmation several times each day.
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Hopalong on June 06, 2006, 07:04:27 AM: Thanks, Moon, for shedding light my way.

Jona, if I take a day off from stating my intention, you mean to begin this affirmation AFTER a day off, right? (It's perfect...and a lot shorter than the stuff I had been reciting to myself):

Quote
I have the perfect job for perfect pay.
I do a wonderful service in a wonderful way.

thanks again (I"m taking a sick day to loll and relax in bed...a little sore throat, so I'll try to knock it out before it's a full-blown cold...that happens to me a lot when I'm feeling very anxious, I get sick).

appreciate the support,
Hops
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: mountainspring on June 06, 2006, 07:45:44 AM: Hope you are feeling better soon. I don't know alot about the Universe thing but keeping I'm my fingers crossed you find the job need.
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Jona22 on June 06, 2006, 08:15:18 AM: Hop,

Say it a few times today if it has a calming effect on you. If not, wait a day.

Don't declare intentions to the point where you feel a panic or feel tense about it. When those feelings arise, let it go for a little while. Affirmations actually cause negative thoughts to arise. Some say that you need to take note of those negative thoughts and make new affirmations for them until they are gone. Everything you are going through is normal and part of the process.
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Hopalong on June 06, 2006, 08:21:23 AM: Thank you, Jona.
I trully appreciate your helping hand and your calm attitude.

Your first post was truly comforting as well.

Breathing (taking a Lazyday off from work, too)...

Hope you have a very good day yourself.

Hops
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: lightofheart on June 06, 2006, 08:28:33 AM: Hi Hops,

imho, Moon gives great advice about leaving as little room for fear as possible. Picture it as a molecule, too small for the naked eye.

One possibility in that vein...

It sounds like you're doing all you can on the job search. One way to keep busy and maybe divert some anxiety: write.

I don't know much about your job background/what you're looking for, but you obviously have no end of writing talent, Hops. Maybe you already write in a journal or write just for fun/to work stuff out? Another possibility would be to buy or look at a copy of the Writers' Market and write something with publication in mind, maybe just for you, maybe to ultimately send out. A piece on your house? This could be just a satisfying outlet exercise, or even a potential source of income/route to make new job contacts.

Just a thought. And I apologize if I'm covering old ground.

I hope you're feeling much better soon. ((((Hops))))

LoH

PS - Heard a winter NPR interview with 3 doctors, who all agreed an incoming cold can be avoided/reduced in severity via spicy food.
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: pennyplant on June 06, 2006, 12:51:27 PM: Hi Hopsy,

A ways back in this thread I tried to explain my take on how it seems to me the universe "works" and how human beings fit into that pattern. It is something I usually can see in hindsight. Sometimes now I can get a feel for what might be coming but only in a general, big picture sense.

The affirmations idea is something I have a lot of trouble understanding and accepting. A week or so ago, I decided to try it for myself and see what, if anything, would happen. Only because I am accepting the idea that we decide on our happiness. That happiness can exist regardless of the external circumstances of our lives.

Somewhere here on the board I think there was the idea of saying what you want to be--only say that is what you ARE. So, I filled up the tub, added some foaming aromatherapy and soaked and exfoliated. Actually I do this almost every day--my very own calming ritual. But this time I said to myself the following:

I am a good friend
I am a good wife
I am a good mother
I am a good daughter
I am a good sister
I am a good neighbor
I am a good worker
I am a good person
I am a good writer

I did not allow myself to even think what I usually do--I'm a good friend except for the times I'm impatient, I'm a good mother except for the first 6 to 10 years of C's childhood, etc.

I always kill any positive idea of myself with a negative slam. I figured I had nothing to lose by ignoring the negative part. Not even allowing it to form up in my mind. Only the positive part was allowed. Afterall the good parts are at least as true as anything negative I could come up with.

I slept well that night and woke up feeling like another area opened up in my thinking. It seems like something shifted in there. I had planned to do the same thing every day for awhile to really see what changes were possible. But... got side-tracked. The thing is, I think this affirmation idea is realistic. Just based on that one day.

Hope this helps.

Pennyplant
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: moonlight52 on June 07, 2006, 04:30:37 AM: INTENTION AND FAITH ARE DREAMS COME TRUE ALSO EXPECT GOOD THINGS THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT LOVE YOURSELF NOW

PLEASE GET RID OF OLD NEGATIVE TAPES NOW TOSS OUT THE WINDOW ALL DONE AND MIXED WITH GRATITUDE

THIS IS TO ME MuM'S SCORPION PROCESS OF LOVING INTENTION

Moon 8)
ps I am working this process and saying all these things to myself work in progress
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Sela on June 07, 2006, 02:12:23 PM: Hi Hops:

Thought this might be helpful. It's an interesting site.

http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2005/10/cause-effect-vs-intention-manifestation/

Sela
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Hopalong on June 07, 2006, 03:23:30 PM: Thank you, Sela...that's spot on.

I've been battling fear all day. I do battle it. I talk to myself constantly in positive ways but those tapes are quick devils.

I feel it in my body...shortness of breath (old panic symptom).

I did move forward to apply for additional positions. Three weeks is so short. Most applicants here are in their 20s or 30s and I'm 56.

I hate being scared.
Hops
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: mountainspring on June 07, 2006, 04:37:57 PM: Hops

Sending prayers... crossing my fingers and my toes and really really hoping your fear subsides and you get one of those jobs. Breathe slow and deep, you will get through this.
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Hops on June 13, 2006, 09:47:38 AM: You guys been torching your slippers for me or something? :shock:

My boss just extended my job until November 1st, which gives me security for four more months of looking!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D

I feel as though the axe got halted in mid-air! :shock:

THANK YOU, THANK YOU...for all the support and thoughts and helpful advice and caring and teaching and wisdom and perspective and for just being one amazing buncha people.

(You are my secret weapon.)

love and gratitude,
Hops
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: mountainspring on June 13, 2006, 10:00:04 AM: :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D

Soooooooooooooooooooooooooo happy for you!!!!
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Jona22 on June 13, 2006, 10:10:00 AM: That is great news. Happy for you. :D
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Sela on June 13, 2006, 10:26:28 AM: Yay! Wonderful! Beautiful! Fantastic!!

:D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8)

Sela
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: lightofheart on June 13, 2006, 10:52:03 AM: Yay, Hops!
Yay, Hops!
Yay, HOPE! (started as a typo, but...) :D

:D :D :D :D

Congrats on realizing your (very good) intention; coudn't have happened to a nicer soul!

8)
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: moonlight52 on June 13, 2006, 01:50:20 PM: HOPS WOW OH WOW

Good Intent you deserve so much goodness and see there it is!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am so happy
Love to you
PS moon family was gone on family vacation1st one in years thats why I missed your happiest of all news I am so happy
Love and Light :D :D :D
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: IamNewtoMe on June 13, 2006, 02:12:52 PM: Congratulations!!!!!! You soooo deserve this!!!!
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: pennyplant on June 13, 2006, 03:56:18 PM: Yippeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

:D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D

Very happy for you!!!

Pennyplant
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Healing&Hopeful on June 13, 2006, 04:05:00 PM: Oh ((((Hoppy)))) I've only just read this.... I'm so made up for you. xx
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: drifter's escape on July 06, 2006, 03:13:50 PM: Quote from: Hopalong on May 29, 2006, 01:03:43 PM
Dear Mum,
You and several other people have now and then referred to your experience of setting your intention, and trusting that the universe will respond to your need. You mentioned it in the Selling Out thread when you were talking about your return to optimism after a period of negativity.

I struggle with having that trust, and wondered if you and others who do find a strong optimism is working for you, might want to explain more about how that came to be and how it works in your lives.

Is is meditation? Positive affirmations?

For example (this is my selfish reason for the thread)...I am quite worried about finding another good job, as so much depends on it. A good job, so I can keep our home. Do you believe that in addition to the work of a job search, that there are other personal practices that might help?

I would love to learn more about this from anyone who has found a deeply optimistic and positive way to look at worry...fear...uncertainty....change.

(And absolutely no offense, and deepest respect, to anyone who wants to share their faith in God from any tradition...but I don't need to read more about that just now. I'm looking for different language--may amount to the same thing in essence, I realize!) Thanks for understanding.

Hops

dear hopalong ..cassidy i presume :)

the intention i think that brings attunement and best response from the universe
is to consider the needs of others before one's own.

and in the present human state a willingness to suffer for other's sake
as discerned by pms... prayer meditation and service...

such would be for now in a nutshell, the essence of said matter...
...
and an exploded nutshell version later maybe :)
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Hopalong on July 06, 2006, 06:29:06 PM: Thanks, Drifter.
I think that it's very difficult to find a balance between altruistic service and self-care.
There are so many parallel quandaries, and maybe they're hard for children of Ns.

Codependent vs. Narcissistic
Caring vs. Cold
Doormat vs. Brick Wall

I think early in my life I over-identified with the idea of sacrificing myself for others.
That led straight, Do Not Pass GO, to a lot of sacrificing myself in bad relationships.
(And perhaps even now, as I care for an elderly N. I didn't feel halfway good about it until
I stopped sacrificing my health and well-being for hers..)

So it's interesting that you raise the issue of sacrifice.
Maybe others will have thoughts about it too.

It's really a tough question. In the name of love, people can move mountains and endure anything for those they love. Then again, yielding to Narcissists stimulates more abuse.

(Oy, my head.)

Hopalong
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: pennyplant on July 06, 2006, 06:54:43 PM: Quote from: Hopalong on July 06, 2006, 06:29:06 PM
So it's interesting that you raise the issue of sacrifice.
Maybe others will have thoughts about it too.

My thoughts on this are that it is a matter of balance, mutuality, and reasonable back and forth in our relationships. Even with Ns. There is a place for saints and martyrs in this world. But not in the home with our families and friends. Not in the workplace either.

Hops, I think you are finding that balance and are definitely on the right path with how you are currently doing things. It is beneficial to your mother on some level too, I believe. It allows her to experience the growth that she is capable of. I know you already know this :) . But it is an accomplishment, and I'm glad to say so :D !

Great job (((Hops)))!

Pennyplant
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Hopalong on July 06, 2006, 09:27:23 PM: Thanks, PP...I hope I can keep some balance as she gets more dependent. Right now...it's a peaceful chapter.

Thanks for this too--a good guilt-reliever (it's so easy to set off that early guilt-training!)
Quote
There is a place for saints and martyrs in this world. But not in the home with our families and friends. Not in the workplace either

((((PP)))) thanks for your thoughtfulness.

Hops
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: pennyplant on July 06, 2006, 09:39:35 PM: You're welcome, Hopsy. It's just what I really believe :D !

PP
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: drifter's escape on July 11, 2006, 06:48:36 PM: Quote from: Hopalong on July 06, 2006, 06:29:06 PM
Thanks, Drifter.
I think that it's very difficult to find a balance between altruistic service and self-care.
There are so many parallel quandaries, and maybe they're hard for children of Ns.

Codependent vs. Narcissistic
Caring vs. Cold
Doormat vs. Brick Wall

I think early in my life I over-identified with the idea of sacrificing myself for others.
That led straight, Do Not Pass GO, to a lot of sacrificing myself in bad relationships.
(And perhaps even now, as I care for an elderly N. I didn't feel halfway good about it until
I stopped sacrificing my health and well-being for hers..)

So it's interesting that you raise the issue of sacrifice.
Maybe others will have thoughts about it too.

It's really a tough question. In the name of love, people can move mountains and endure anything for those they love. Then again, yielding to Narcissists stimulates more abuse.

(Oy, my head.)

Hopalong

I think i refered to exploding the nutshell in my first post...
for starters, a way not to waste good intentions could be
discernment of needs like if another needs rebuked
before they should be forgiven and only if they repent
in some cases..........
yet still love the sinner but hate the sin for what it does to
others as well as to the sinner.....
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: moonlight52 on July 11, 2006, 07:08:45 PM: Hi Drifter ,Are good intentions ever wasted really.Is Love the best defense against any perceived "evil"?

Yes discernment is necessary to protect oneself from harm.

I am not comfortable in a seat of judgment.In the Law Intent is everything did the sinner mean to sin or are there mitigating circumstances?

But only discernment to protect loved ones.As for forgiveness I have sinned and the only way I have found to truly detach from ndad is to forgive him .

I do not care much what he thinks of me."Hating sin" ouch,Hating anything does not help self or universe to heal neither does fear.

I hope I have understood the thread .Please let me know if I have not.

Moon :D
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: drifter's escape on July 11, 2006, 07:17:52 PM: moon,
perhaps you missed the implications of how i said to hate sin...
for what is does to others and the sinner.....

but not that sin and evil can cut one off totally from full redemption
tho some evil souls might spend a long time in hell...
as the greek word that is often translated eternally means
i think more properly for a long duration of a particular type...
and it servers i think a purpose of getting the sinner's attention
so as to pay better attention next time around....
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: moonlight52 on July 11, 2006, 07:42:55 PM: Hi Drifter ,

We are all responsible for our own soul ,life,feelings etc

I do not personally blame others for what is my shadow self nor do I wring my hands in worry .I try to take a path of kindness .

We are human we live our life awake or not.And choose at some point to live with what we can or change it.Judgment is not my job.

I only just got my life back with my Mr moon and 2 girls .We are finding our way .I want everyone in this beautiful world to find their way .

I will say of all my teachers my n dad taught me the most .I have learned how to Love and about forgiveness .Learned the hard way.Lesson done.Lessons can also be learned by kindness and Love .

I must say after a lifelong of abuse and finally understanding this cycle of abuse .I have set myself free.

I understand being stuck in the pain and sometimes I get stuck and then I recognize that place of pain and try to unhook.

Moon
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Hops on July 12, 2006, 09:17:09 AM: Hi Moon,
Thanks for asking about the thread's intent. I was asking not about religion, sin, Christian scripture or theology....but trying to get a grip on a broader (maybe vaguer) kind of meaning.

I was recalling some wonderful posts by...Mum? and others....where I realized that some folks here are very comfortable with a kind of personal spiritual practice that involves trusting the universe and believing that positive intentions, in a mysterious way, attract positive outcomes.

I wiould love to hear more examples of how that works for people ... what they say or do to encourage themselves, what this practice might look like or what actions/thoughts it might involve. (Wasn't looking for Christian or religious messages, but I'm always happy to hear from anybody/everybody!)

I've got just 2 1/2 months to go to land a job, so I think it's time for me to bear down in every area of my life. This is one where I know the board can help.

Thanks in advance!
xo,
Hops
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: moonlight52 on July 12, 2006, 01:36:15 PM: Hi Hops ,

I feel all the cosmic wisdom around the Earth and I visualize this light shining down on our planet and I sort of see myself stepping into
the light.

I have reread thu this thread and it is so lovely to see where each person was at and where we helped one another .

As mum as said leave as little room for fear and doubt as much room for gratitude and faith and wonder in the world, things come your way.
as you so well deserve.And it is good to remember mankind is all one to tap into that oneness and light.

Love and Light,
MoonLight
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: pennyplant on July 12, 2006, 06:54:38 PM: Hops,

I so want to be able to explain the process of just trusting the universe to take care of how things work out in your life. I came to this conclusion about how it works by looking at the events of my life, first of all during the past five or six years. Then once I saw the pattern of how my small events and decisions fit into a bigger picture, mostly having to do with what I needed to learn, I began applying this thinking to earlier events in my life that had hurt me or seemed otherwise senseless. I kind of filled in the reasons for myself based on what seemed most likely to be useful in my personal growth.

I know this is vague but there are far too many stories and details to relate in one post. And plus, it is specific to my life. Your stories would be unique to you. So, I am suggesting looking at your life as something of a history of the "education" of Hopalong and her soul. There will be patterns. You might start with how worried you have been about your current employment situation and there was a deadline looming over you. Then a reprieve came and the deadline was extended. Some things in your life have resolved themselves during this time--I'm referring to the peace you gained from accepting your daughter's relationship with you as it currently is, and also how this visit with your brother has led to some progress as well. There may be many other things you can look at in this way. These are the couple of things that you shared here which seem to have a heightened meaning, there is a peacefulness that is coming through your posts, and so that is why I bring it up as a starting point.

When I started to see it in my life, there was a similar peacefulness and certainty about something special happening in our lives that gained my attention. A heightened awareness that it was time for me to set aside my worry, stubbornness, fear, even any ideas I might have had about actions to take. Instead, it was--just do what presents itself next, go through each door as it opens, learn from each encounter. Follow my heart.

Once I saw that this was how life was working, it occurred to me that maybe it has always been working this way. So, I looked at the past and did indeed find patterns where I was given opportunities to learn, survive, grow, etc. I hadn't been able to see it at the time. But I'm convinced that my life has always worked out in the best way for me to learn the most important things that I need to know. I'm lucky. So far, it seems that I'm meant to be a fairly healthy person who lives an average life with a loving family. Employment has worked itself out, shelter has worked itself out, kids have grown up and seem to be doing things they have talent for. It might have been possible for me to destroy all that with fear and worry. Thankfully I came to my senses and saw life for what it is.

I don't want to go into too much detail about specific events from the time when I began to see how it works. But it involved my son being hospitalized, getting kicked out of college, needing a place to live, etc. In two days, we got him out of the hospital, got the bill paid for, got him back into school, got him a psychiatrist who we could afford, found him an apartment we could afford, with friends he could rely on, he didn't have to come back home with us, which he truly dreaded as he hates our hometown. It was like watching things unfold. Like it was a movie or something and not our real lives. There were so many details that I couldn't have prepared for. So many ways it could have gone badly wrong. We didn't know what to do when the thing started. We were completely up against a wall. We really had no choice but to let the universe take over. I remember so many times during the two days when I would be just sitting and the tears would just come. Sitting in a chinese restaurant with our son and nothing could be said. Just tears. Sitting on a bench in the waiting room and not knowing what to do next. Asking for help from someone who turned out not to be in our corner. But that was good knowledge to have. Letting his friends help us and it turned out they really knew best. They were the ones who found the apartment. All this happened when I was unemployed with no job prospects in sight. I think in a similar situation my own parents would have said NO! to everything, no psychiatrist, no apartment, no school, because we can't afford it. Instead we just sort of jumped off a cliff and held on tight. And somehow made a soft landing. In a matter of days we went from the depths of despair to seeing our son so happy that we trusted him and his friends and allowed him to do what he needed to do to live his life.

What is still hard sometimes is letting go of wanting a particular outcome. Sometimes I don't even realize how invested I am in a particular outcome (usually wanting something to work out a certain way due to missed experiences in the past) until I'm depressed or crying or all tied up in knots about someone or something. That is quite a challenge for me still.

But I don't think me still having that issue prevents me from believing what I believe and being able to see the forces at work in my life and keeping myself going in that direction which is the right direction for me. There are some things currently that I'm going to have to let go of, and I'm disappointed about it, disappointed in myself. But I hold out hope that the things I'm going to let go of may still be possible in the future and that maybe I can try again. It seems obvious that I'm not ready right now anyway. It's just that I'm so used to being disappointed in myself!!! Soon, that habit will fall by the wayside and that will feel good.

I hope this is concrete enough to give you something to work with. It's really just a matter of seeing. And letting go and being carried along somewhat. It is not inactive on your part. But your actions might become different from the old habits. It depends on what you end up seeing, I guess.

Pennyplant
Title: Re: Intention & the Universe
Post by: Hops on July 13, 2006, 09:15:15 AM: Thanks very much, PennyP. This is very helpful...
I related so much to your anguished parent story, and am learning about the next part.
This one hit me where I have lived too long, a great flag to have:
Quote
It might have been possible for me to destroy all that with fear and worry. Thankfully I came to my senses and saw life for what it is.

I relate to this too:
Quote
Sometimes I don't even realize how invested I am in a particular outcome (usually wanting something to work out a certain way due to missed experiences in the past) until I'm depressed or crying or all tied up in knots

You certainly did spot the most meaningful things in my life:
Quote
These are the couple of things that you shared here which seem to have a heightened meaning,

This
Quote
peacefulness....coming through [my] posts
comes and goes (sometimes it's real, other times I think it's just exhaustion, as someone mentioned on the sleep deprivation thread...you? :)

But I do need to practice trust. I have a nagging voice that says, the Lord helps those who help themselves...but I think that's good nagging.

Thank you Penny. This helped a lot...just gave me a context to imagine what this kind of setting-intention-then-letting-go work feels like to another person.

I really appreciate this effortful answer.

Hops