Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board
Voicelessness and Emotional Survival => Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board => Topic started by: AnnaH28 on February 05, 2004, 07:57:01 AM
-
I've been away for a few days and have been reading over as many posts as I could over the past couple of hours and, damn!
The thread started by Avery regarding Portia's posts - I think we all need to go grab our Ns, drag them to the computers, sit them down in front of that thread, force them to read it through and then say "See? That's how it's done. That's how human beings communicate in a healthy way."
I don't know if Avery has returned to the board, and hopefully he/she has. I found the whole discussion interesting and I think the crux of the discussion was tone. I, like Portia, can be, and am, quite direct at times. I also appreciate directness. I often find myself in a position of having offended someone (often a kind, sensitive and well-meaning someone, like Avery) without having intended any offense at all. I think the intent is key. If someone says something to me that I find offensive, and my feelings are hurt, I may express that hurt. However, if the person then makes clear to me that no offense was meant, I am over it, not to mention relieved as all get out. Intent is important. I always try to remember that other people have different ways of communicating, and I also have my own particular way. The important thing is, Portia was trying to help. So was Avery. Everyone's intention were good.
This place is a breath of uncontaminated air, that's for sure. I feel the urge to get mushy and faux-profound here, so I will resist except to say that I am so very, very thankful for this board. I personally feel (and sense that others do as well) that the sanctuary to be had here is so meaningful for me, someone who has felt without sanctuary for large chunks of my life.
-
Nice one, Anna - Thank you for pointing that out. :)
I think that we struggle to communicate, we struggle to express our voice without damaging others, we fear that we damage others and struggle to remain strong and NOT damage others.
And our voices - our strength and our individuality - only damage others if they have already been damaged.
If we remain silent then two people are damaged. At least, if we express our reality, then one person can be saved (us) - and perhaps a second if the damaged person finds the courage to follow our lead... :?:
R