Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board
Voicelessness and Emotional Survival => What Helps? => Topic started by: Survivor on March 04, 2004, 11:29:56 AM
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I am the oldest daughter of a Narcissist mother and an alcoholic father (who just died one month ago). I have not had much of a relationship with my mother during my adulthood (I'm 44), but had to be around her while my father was dying and during the funeral. My younger sister had honestly not "seen" my mother's ways until my dad's funeral. Now my sister wants nothing to do with her. I feel totally betrayed by my sister and father for never standing up for me (I was the target of my mother's rage, lies, etc.) I am grateful my sister finally sees her for what she is, but how can I forgive her for never standing up for me? Also, since my father just died, how can I ever forgive him? I know I need to, but I have spent so many years being the total target of this woman (for standing up to her years ago and moving on with my own life). This is new for me because no one would believe me in the past . . . now they do. My mother was very good at putting me down to them and making them believe it was me and not her. Since she is getting older, she is getting more and more "crazy" and can't fool people like she used to. Where should I go from here?
Thanks for your help!!
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Dear Survivor,
Welcome. First let me express my sympathies for what you are going through right now. It's an awful lot to deal with esp. with the death of a parent.
If you don't mind, I'm going to bring your message over to the discussion side of the board where you might receive more support. Hate to be niggly-piggly in the midst of grief. But it's to get you more support. (Click on the message board forum index, then on Discussion link.)
See you over there. Best, Seeker
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Seeker,
I guess I'm not sure where to go . . . I didn't see anything to click on that said "discussion". Can you help me out a bit more?
Thanks!
Survivor