Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board
Voicelessness and Emotional Survival => Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board => Topic started by: spyralle on March 14, 2007, 03:21:47 PM
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I just got to thinking that I always post when I am at my lowest but today I wanted to share some positive stuff... My daughter had her halfway scan today and we discovered that she is having a boy which lokks healthy!!! I just went for a job interview.. I'm kind of in two minds about it but the interview went really well and I felt good about myself when I walked out of there...
And I also wanted to say thankyou... To God or whoever or whatever is up there, to you lot for helping me through the most difficult times of my life and watching my back.. To my beautiful daughter.... to my friends especially one friend who has helped me start to live again lately.. and thanks for the beautiful sunshine over the past two days It has really lifted my mood..
It would be great for people to find some positives to share because I have discovered that even in the depths of despair there is always a tiny thread to cling on to..
Love
Spyralle xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
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Thankyou, Spyralle, for starting this thread. What a nice idea!
I find remembering, thinking about and appreciating the good stuff helps me to have a more positive attitude, in general, and that helps make life more pleasant.
One of the most important things I am so grateful for is my health. Without it, there is little else in life. Every time I live through a nasty cold or flu, I am so very grateful when I recover! I'd like to say that I remember to be glad and aware of this every day, but I'm not. Still, it's a good goal. And today, I am very aware and glad to be as healthy as I am and determined to work toward maitaining and improving my health.
I also feel very grateful to have been blessed with my children. They are so ......I wanna say.....life-enhancing. I've learned so much from them and enjoy being around them and sharing with them. They enliven the world with their youth and it's pleasures, it's enthusiasm and it's openness to possibilities. As I have aged, I have lost some of that and my kids remind me (without being aware of it) to renew and revive as much of that in myself as I can. I guess I never expected such a gift.
:D Sela
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Thank you Sprayelle for sharing this wonderful news about a precious baby on his way. - GS
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Hi, Spyralle. Thanks for posting your good news. Lucky baby, Spyralle, to have you for a Grandma. What a blessed child!
I just got to thinking that I always post when I am at my lowest
When I read this (above) I realized that might be why I no longer visit here. That and general life being busy/crazy. I guess I posted a lot when a lot when I was going through a lot. In that way, I realize it's a selfish thing, really. Foul weather friend, etc.
Maybe it's because I did "get through" and no longer feel voiceless, nor do I feel my children are voiceless anymore........
Not sure. Or maybe it's because my entire view on life is so different, it's almost hard to explain. Or maybe it's because when I was here a lot, I was in a lot of pain, and this place, although a healing place for me, was somehow part of my former view of life.
Then again...does it matter....
I do think of the folks here, and am so incredibly grateful for everysingle one. Regardless of what each of us in "going through", or however we view this human experience, we ARE sisters and brothers on this journey, all one, all children of love (yup, even those "Nidiots" who have disconnected from this).
Mum
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Woops. I was going to start another thread, so as not to hijack this one, but I realized that Spyralle actually was asking for folks to post positives. My life is nothing but. I could write a YIPEE book but it would just be about life and it would not be nearly as interesting to read as it is to live, to be sure.
Anyway, my mother passed away in January. I am so grateful that I was able to live near here for at least a little while before she left this world. Some of you might remember my story, and that she had been ill for quite some time.
Since this is a "good, positive things" thread, I should share why her death was such a good thing.
My mother had been a very athletic, verbally articulate and quick witted woman. Very strong, but with a gracious and soft kindness she shared with everyone. My father died 21 years ago, and she did a remarkable job staying positive and strong without him for the remainder of her life.
My mother spent the last few years slowly and gradually becoming incapacitated. By the time she died, she could barely speak, could not walk or do anything physical by herself. During her last weeks, she could barely move.
It's a lot to explain the medical pathology of why she slowly disintegrated, but essentially, she was old and it was her time.
This incredible woman remained amazing until her last breath. She pretty much went in and out of consiousness and sanity for a while and in her last week, she could not speak, except to say:
"Thank you" and "I love you".
This she said, and later barely whispered, to anyone who came near her: to the nursing home attendants or any of us who adjusted her body or swabbed her dry mouth, or simply came to sit with her. Everyone.
I am overwhelmed sometimes, thinking about those two expressions that this formerly articulate, intellegent "lover of words" had reduced her communication to.
Those two things are all we need. To express gratitude and love. The essence of our true nature...our true purpose as humans.
And that she never lost. Or perhaps she found it again, uncovered after years of "life" layered over it.
There is a harpist at the nursing home, who as part of a study on dying and music, goes into the rooms of the terminally ill patients to play for them.
On the morning of Friday, January 12th, while the harpist played to her, my mother quietly let go of her body.
I have nothing but joy in my heart that I knew such an amazing lady and got to call her mom.
Mum
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(((((((((((((((((((((mum))))))))))))))))))))) Your beautiful story made me cry and smiale at the same time. She passed all that love onto you and you will be able to contine that graciousness and kindness through life. I have not forgotten the way you held my hand during what was one of the darkest times of my life...
You too Sela xxx
It would be grat if we could carry on this positive thread... Tiny steps and all that but the way I see it, Lots of time glimmers make a brilliant light..
Spyralle xxx
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Wow Mum - thank you so much for sharing. I have a goal of moving into that positive life. I am so glad to hear that you are already there - were once here and now are there. That's the path I plan to take. - GS
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Thank you Mum.
No wonder you picked that name.
I want to end the way your Mom did.
She was lucky to have you to love.
Hops
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Hiya Mum:
I'm sorry to hear of the loss of your dear mother. I'm glad you have so many wonderful memories of her and thankyou for sharing some of them. I think you must be a lot like your mum! She lives on in you and your family, I'm sure.
Oh yes thankyou Spyralle! Lots of time glimmers make a brilliant light..
That way we can all get a healthy sun tan!!! 8) 8) 8)
:D Sela
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Hi Spy,
This is a wonderful opportunity for a divine nickname. I am quite bent in this respect. (I named a cat Ratso, another Exxon, a dog Big, my unborn child Cosmo Shmoo and a canary Festus.)
So, with impending grandmotherhood, is there to be a contest? These names need to be one or two easy to pronouce syllables, right? "W" sounds help, as in Gwanny. I have too many syllables so these entries must be disqualified:
Grannypants
Cronella Divine
Willygan
hugs
Hops
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I was seriously considering nonna but that sounds extwemely boring now!!!!!!!
So I am off to let my creativity flow so I can seriously compete!!!
Love Cronella Divine xxxxxxx
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I have a new positive thing.. I finally mamaged to tidy my garden and paint my window sills yesterday ready to sell my house.. I feel I am inching forward..
Spyralle x
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I have inched a bit more.. The estate agent is coming tomorrow to value my house... I have had enough of being a prisoner in this house full of traumatic memories... I am soooo going!!!!!!!!!
Spyralle x
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Hi Spy:
Here's hoping you sell your house as soon as you like for as much as you want!!
Also.....that you will find a lovely, peaceful, serene home to move into.
This morning I looked out my bedroom window and was greeted by 3 robins and a cardinal. All sitting in the tree and taking turns at the feeders. A sure sign of spring!!
Have a wonderful day all!!
:D Sela
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Hey Sela,
How symbolic.. I am embracing Spring and am wanting to leave winter far behind... Todays positive is that I have verbal diarrhoea and therefore am getting lots of stuff off my chest... I have decided to come up with a positive everyday.. therefore I will always have something to hold onto..
Love
Spyralle x
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Hey Cronella,
I prefer to think of you as verbally FOUNTAINING, and with an armload of daffodils.
hugs,
Hops
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Only Hops could make something so sweet out of something.....that expression (clears throat) :D.
Great idea Spy!! Something positive every day (or just about eh?)! Will you post it here?
Maybe I'll try to keep up, when I can, if you want?
Ok (assuming you'll not mind): my positive for today is that my Hubby has had a rotten, nasty, wicked dose of cold/cough whatnot for some days now and I haven't caught it! And although I feel very, very sorry for him and have tried to wash it out of him with special tea and other remedies......I am practically joyful for me because I DO NOT WANT THE THING!! (plus he is starting to feel better so I hope the worst is over and that's a good thing too!).
:D Sela
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Hey Hops and Sela...
Cronella is back waterfalling verbally and flinging daffs all over the place... Yes Sela it would be great if as many people as poss started posting positives on a daily basis there should always be one little bright spark that lights up our day nomatter how tiny and fleeting...
Todys for me is when the estate agent came round yesterday I had guessed he would value my house between about 230 and 250k.... HE VALUED IT AT 325!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am sooo very excited and he has found me a financial advisor to take my finances in hand.. and you know what.. I wasn't scared... I was soooooo frightened he would look down on me because of the state of my house but he loved it...Just shows how how perception of ourselves differs to others
Spyralle Divine Willygag shake your booty !!!!!!!!
S xxxxx
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Wowsers, Spy!
That's a wonderful bit of luck about the house...congrats!
Needs to be some very good feelings come out of this for you, you've earned them.
(And thanks, Sela hon. :oops:)
My Very Good Thing, which I'll probably announce on 17 threads, is that I got 90% of the filing done in the last few days, and am toying with the idea of a side business selling something whimsical that would make me very happy.
love,
Hops
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Thanks Hops... I had two viewers yesterday It was very very scary but I did it so I feel a tiny bit proud....
That is fantastic news about the filing.. I bet you feel massively relieved. Someone lent me a book recently called 'Eat that frog' It goes along the lines of the old saying that if the first thing you do in the morning is to eat a live frog, you'll have the satisfaction of knowing that it's the worst thing you'll probably have to do all day... I'm well impressed with you as I procrastinate about stuff all the time..(I've been doing it about the estate agents for ages)..
What kinds of whimsical stuff.... I was always very impressed with the woman who invented scrunchies and became a millionaire..
Todays good thing for me is that I am dealing slowly with the loss of my friends and I am still feeling dare I say it OK.....
Spyralle xxxxxxxx
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Hey Spy,
It's a garment with a witty image...sort of like a Tshirt. I won't go into much detail but I have my fingers crossed! (Long complicated procedures involved and many things to learn about sourcing, etc...since I'm using organic fabric). Really, it's more like being a facilitator, getting a neat image and garment together.
I'm pretty confident I'll be able to market it myself. It may take a year to get it done though. I just decided not to be afraid all the time about retirement, but do something about it.
Hops
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Oh that's wonderful news about the house Spy! This is the best time of year to list too! The most eager buyers willing to pay the most for what they want are out now! Hope one picks your place soon!!
Wow! Good for you Hops! Wishing you much success!! (and enough riches to make retirement comfy).
Well, the good news today is it's raining. Why is that good news? Because I'm sick of winter and it's a sure sign of spring (they're even forcasting thunderstorms!). The rain is cleaning the mud off my vehicle and has taken most of the snow away.
Horray for Spring!!
:D Sela
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That sounds cool Hops.. Put my name down for one when you have created them!! I greatly admire you tackling your worries about retirement and doing something about it... I'm kinda thinking lately that that is the way to go.. Just take the bull by the horns and jump right in... I have no clue where I'll be working by the end of April but I refuse to drown in despair... I am just doing by best tofind the right job..
Sela... There are loads of daffodils here so I share your excitement about Spring.. And the clocks went forward yesterday so now it is lighter in the evenings.. Hooray for that!!
My good thing for today is that I went to see the doctor and told him I had stopped taking the Anti D's For the frst time in a long time I wasn't crying but was full of hope..
Spyralle xxx
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Oh Spy! That's wonderful news! Full of hope!! Stay filled up!! Decide to!! I can see you're trying to spread some of that around too! Thankyou!!
Well.....my positive thing is that a customer came into my office and said: "Good morning sweet sunshine!" to me and I thought:
"Holey Moley! Am I really giving off a glow? What good news! I must look somewhat happy rather than like the old, sad, lost look I think I had.!"
He could have just been flattering me but I decided to receive it as a gift and celebrate that I am walking the walk, at least somewhat, as I struggle to really focus on, feel and spread sunshine! I believe I will get there too, because I've made my mind up!!
(((((((((hugs to all)))))))))
:D Sela
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(((((( Sela ))))))
Just reading your Sunshine made me smile and glow :)
Thanks for sharing.
Leah xx
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My positive thing for today is I have had a great day at work and really feel that i have made a difference to the children i look after.......
i can finally see a glimmer of light at the end of a very long tunnel.......i think my life is turning round at last and i am in a positive space at the moment ...long may it last.
thanks spyralle
love to you all
sandra x x x
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Glowing Spy...
Hopeful Sandra...
:D :D :D
Hops
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Hi all!
Today, my positive thing is that I'm going to feed my OQD (Obsessive Quilting Disorder) by going to a sewing show, which I am looking forward to! I love seeing all the new gadgets and fabrics and watching the demonstrations and learning little tricks and I so enjoy talking to people who are much wiser and knowledgable than I am, who can answer my questions and give me the direction I need.
So I'm off! Hope you all have a wonderful day!
:D Sela
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I had a wonderful overnight retreat w/45 UU women at a nearby conf. center. We danced, sang, met in small groups, made prayer beads, journaled, walked, had a silent hour and other meditation periods, and they gave me my own room since I snore. It was lovely and I'm grateful. I gave a young woman a ride who met her H in the East, he was a student soldier in a pro-democracy army...had literally lived in the jungle for years. I'm going to organize driving lessons for him. It was a great retreat, a night off, peaceful, community, all the good stuff.
I walked to the top of a hill and lay on a bench just listening to birdsong.
love
Hops
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snorrrtt!
aaank!
sawwww...
etc
H
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((((( Hops )))))
What a wonderful retreat - I would like to go on a retreat.
and
....... " I walked to the top of a hill and lay on a bench just listening to birdsong."
sounds like sheer bliss.
So happy for you.
Leah xx