Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board

Voicelessness and Emotional Survival => Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board => Topic started by: daylily guest on July 04, 2007, 12:39:58 AM

Title: hi all, just checking in
Post by: daylily guest on July 04, 2007, 12:39:58 AM

Hi everybody:

I'm feeling stronger now, so I wanted to stop by.  It's been a really tough month, but I think there's some reason to be optimistic now.  (I'm not trying to be cryptic, but I also don't want to share too much medical detail here.)

I learned something important along the way.  Many of you have written about this, but I didn't entirely get it until now.

You have to forgive the person you were in order to accept the person you are.

I've spent so many years hating myself for not being wiser, not being stronger, not fighting more aggressively for myself.  Only recently have I come to understand that I was a child.  It was incumbent on others, not me, to be wise and strong.  I adapted.  I stayed alive.  I kept my humanity and my capacity to love.

That was a lot.

That was enough.

This illness is a crucible, and when all the hatred burns away, what's left is forgiveness.  For others, true, but in some ways that's been the easy part for me.  The hard part has been recognizing that I deserve it, too.

Anyway, I'm doing much better, and I'm looking forward to what comes next.

daylily

Title: Re: hi all, just checking in
Post by: lighter on July 04, 2007, 01:01:45 AM

Wow daylily...... reading that post was the best part of my day. 

Title: Re: hi all, just checking in
Post by: Hopalong on July 04, 2007, 02:01:19 AM

Daylily,
I am so glad to hear this.  :)

I am so wowed by your wisdom and deep strength.

Sending you love and steady support,
Hops

Title: Re: hi all, just checking in
Post by: Ami on July 04, 2007, 08:36:26 AM

WOW-- Thank you Day Lily- If you could, would you tell us more about the steps in the process? 
                                                                                      Love   Ami

Title: Re: hi all, just checking in
Post by: Overcomer on July 04, 2007, 11:57:37 AM

Good to hear from you and a great revelation!

Title: Re: hi all, just checking in
Post by: teartracks on July 04, 2007, 02:02:49 PM

Hi Day Lily,

So happy you're up and about.  Glad your spirits are up.  Glad for the lesson about forgiving oneself.  I was just tusseling with that very thing last night.  I so enjoy your posts.  As you feel like it, please impart your wisdom to us.   

Admiring and sending my very best,
tt

Title: Re: hi all, just checking in
Post by: WRITE on July 05, 2007, 07:52:38 PM

Hi Daylily, glad you're doing well and glad you're back!

Title: Re: hi all, just checking in
Post by: reallyME on July 06, 2007, 11:09:00 AM

Quote

Only recently have I come to understand that I was a child.

See, the thing is, I was NOT a child during my experiences.  I was an adult codependent/dependent.

Title: Re: hi all, just checking in
Post by: gratitude28 on July 06, 2007, 11:15:18 AM

((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((Daylily)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

So glad you are here and feeling stronger. Just saw my sister-in-law's mom this week who had breast cancer. She is doing well. You are so strong to have made it through this.

Thank you for being here and adding your voice, which I always love to hear.

Love, Beth