Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board
Voicelessness and Emotional Survival => Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board => Topic started by: gratitude28 on September 17, 2007, 05:35:23 PM
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I have a question... I am feeling rather aimless lately with just having moved, no job, not yet settled literally or figuratively. I am trying to settle into SOMETHING... anything. And I am feeling out of sorts. I have been walking (lots), eating well, knitting some, painting a bit and drawing. I have plenty of friends... I am looking into work... but I still do not know how long we will be here.
What keeps you settled and on track. What makes you feel like your day was worthwhile?????
Thanks for any input.
Love, Beth
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There's some positive force inside, that's been tested, but keeps winning out: /
I've noted it several times..... when I've been tempted to make very bad choices..... then chosen better.
On the whole...now... it's my children that give my life meaning.
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Yes, lighter, my kids light up my life too. They are always enjoyable to be with. They are in school now and sports after. We still chat about what they did everyday and go for weekend jaunts. Maybe that is why I am feeling odd - being alone. I guess I just need to get used to it.
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Dear Beth,
I love my husband and children, and anything outside!! but for fulfillment and direction, full of meaning, it's Bible study for me... often through audio messages, so that I can keep moving while listening.
If I skip a day, I feel the emptiness begin to creep in... old thought patterns and habits of feeling.
Today's was about finding your purpose... and how God's design for each of us is built into our dna, so that the thing for which we're best suited is that which we will most enjoy doing!
I hope to find that soon... and better late than never, I say!
Also, there was a passage from the psalms, very cool... about the many pleasant thoughts God has toward each of us - more in number than the sands of the sea.
The teacher says: "God has your picture in His wallet"... made me smile.
Love,
Carolyn
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Thanks, Carolyn. I am missing something spiritual in my life now. I checked out meetings last week in the area and didn't go. Now I know where they are. Guess it's time to get my sorry butt up and go. Thanks for the idea. Gosh, it seems it should be obvious, eh?
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(((((Beth))))) I often have to trip over the obvious stuff before it catches my notice.
You know how oblivious a new mom can get to her own needs... even the simplest things, physically speaking... like needing to use the bathroom...? Well, do you ever feel like you've spent your entire life in that mode... runnin on fumes? Whew, I need that daily bread.
Sometimes I just go to the audio Bible website and listen to that olde English guy read it, chapter by chapter... comfort food.
Love,
Carolyn
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It is the small things for me that make life more meaningful.
The way G looks at me.
Watching Hank and Dewey play dog tag unexpectedly.
Waking up in th middle of the night, and looking out the window to see the stars on a clear night.
The smell of the first real rain of the season.
My friends and the family I chose.
A nice glass of wine or a great margarita!
Good food.
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For me,it is about receiving God's love. I am in a place where nothing can hurt me. I am not an abused person with an N mother. I am a very loved child of the King.
Sometime,I can feel His presence and I will feel waves of peace and love descend on me. I will be totally in the moment and at perfect peace
Sometimes this happens as I am lying in bed ready to go to sleep. It reminds me of the saying,"There is no high like the Most High." Love Ami
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A nice glass of wine or a great margarita!
Good food.
Margaritas may not give my life meaning but.....
food sure does....
darnit.
Eh.... ::nodding::
Gotta love a good frozen margi with half salt and Mexican on the side.
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Gotta love a good frozen margi with half salt and Mexican on the side.
Whaaaat???? :D
CB
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Hi lighter,
Me too. Heavenly. One of my favorites. Mexican food with a pitcher of Margaritas made with Cointreau, not Triple Sec. Yum! My daughter and I were talking about that not more than an hour ago on IM.
Edit in: However, that is not what gives my life meaning. What gives it meaning is my relationship with God. On the days when I'm diligent and do morning devotions, It makes the biggest difference.
tt
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I adore you guys- it was a dreadful day, yet I can't stop laughing at your posts!!!! Thank you!!!!!
Changing
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Major meaning I'm finding in a book I'm reading right now:
Three Cups of Tea, by Mortensen and Relin
Too sleepy to fill you in but it's amazing.
night,
Hops
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Dear Beth,
Most people ask that question, get nervous, and have children instead of answering it, lol.
I personally don't feel that life has any meaning, since whatever we do or accomplish in life, results in death. To me thats a bummer and I have not yet seen any proof that there is life after death (not have any of you). I suppose I'm a nihilist at heart. But I do enjoy living and see it as a precious gift. Interestingly, I have goals, I get worked up about environmental issues, cruelty to people and animals, and I care a lot about life. I think some of this is because life seems so short, and so precious to me, that I value it so highly.
Beth, surely you're outlook isn't as depressing as mine?
X Bella
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Major meaning I'm finding in a book I'm reading right now:
Three Cups of Tea, by Mortensen and Relin
Too sleepy to fill you in but it's amazing.
night,
Hops
I'M READING THAT ONE TOO RIGHT NOW!
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I didn't have children till I was almost 40 yo.
I didn't have them bc my life had no meaning.
When I had children... I did believe in God and that life continues.... on some level (probably several) after death.
What gives this life meaning though..... is knowing that my children will go on without me and I have to prepare them for that eventuality.
::dropping to knees::
WHat have I done!?!?!
I thought they'd stay little forever...... and things would never change: (
Dear Beth,
Most people ask that question, get nervous, and have children instead of answering it, lol.
I personally don't feel that life has any meaning, since whatever we do or accomplish in life, results in death. To me thats a bummer and I have not yet seen any proof that there is life after death (not have any of you). I suppose I'm a nihilist at heart. But I do enjoy living and see it as a precious gift. Interestingly, I have goals, I get worked up about environmental issues, cruelty to people and animals, and I care a lot about life. I think some of this is because life seems so short, and so precious to me, that I value it so highly.
Beth, surely you're outlook isn't as depressing as mine?
X Bella
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I know, CB.....
I know: (
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Bella,
I think sometimes it may be. It's funny you say that, because I do see my life is time capsules often. I am at this stage or that stage - but I always know the final outcome. Good thought. So... how do I get around it???? When we were in Japan and I got moody like this, I would go snorkeling and it would give me a fresh perspective. I need somehting like that here... I think that something is what I am searching for right now.
Love, Beth
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I find that my life is such a treadmill that I do not have much time to step back and smell the roses. I do know that in a blink of an eye your kids are grown and when you tell that to parents of small children they do not get it. But when I see fussy little ones I am glad they are not mine. But I heard being a grandma is a VERY cool thing!
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I need some treadmill in my life - lol.
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No you dont! But then again you did move from over seas to here-that had to be awful! Didnt you move to Virginia? There is so much to do there. Washington D C, the beach, lots more than Iowa!
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Yes, there is tons to do here. The time I have to do it in is when I am alone. I like to do outings with the family. I think that's what it gets back to once again - what to do with my time alone.
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I suppose you could read or take a yoga class. Shop. Decorate. Hang out at the bar all day! Joke there! Garden. Cross stitch. Watch soap operas. Get a dog or kitty. Volunteer. Get a job. Lift weights. Swim. Join a ladies group at church. Join Arbonne under me so we both can make millions of dollars!
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Hi Beth,
Someplace recently, I think I read you say that you're not sure how long you'll be in your current location?
I know for me, that'd be enough to set me on edge and make me reluctant to get too involved with anything.
Thinking of ways to overcome that "unknown" factor... maybe some sort of shorter-term commitment? Volunteer work perhaps?
I love to be around older folks, and around here, they're the only ones working the community sharing/thrift shop/food distribution for the needy places. I've considered getting involved with that, but been so busy here putting my own home into order... just now finally got our roof fixed after months of waiting.
Oh, also... maybe even an online class, which would be something you could take along with you, even if there's another move in the near future? Might be good to have something like that in the works, that's not dependent on location.
Love,
Carolyn
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Yes, Carolyn, I think that might be a large part of it - not knowing if we are staying.
At any rate, we did plan a "Get to know the Neighbors" party for Sat - so I need to plan and clean. Time to get to work - lol. That should occupy me for a few days.
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Beth, you could paint.
Art is what gets my blood going. So, I guess that's why I remember that you paint.
Pennyplant
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I think what gives life meaning is a balance of many of things mentioned -- family, activity, religion, self-expression. But I find my most fulfilling moments in service to others. The lifting of someones spirits. The "paying it forward" stuff , big or small, I think this is the place where it all comes together for me. Building myself is rewarding....but building someone else is what really fills me.
Poppy
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Thank you Poppy, and I think you are very right. I need to get off my butt and start doing more... especially for others. Thank you.
Love, Beth
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Hey Poppy ::waving::
So glad to see you there.....
I agree on this post, of yours.
I also see that it would make it easier for N's to get a hold of us and drive us into the ground.... like a beach donkey.
Axa... I never get tired of that one, lol.
Glad to see you again Poppy.
Very busy time for me.... be taking a short break... see you soon.
I think what gives life meaning is a balance of many of things mentioned -- family, activity, religion, self-expression. But I find my most fulfilling moments in service to others. The lifting of someones spirits. The "paying it forward" stuff , big or small, I think this is the place where it all comes together for me. Building myself is rewarding....but building someone else is what really fills me.
Poppy
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What? I'm coming and now you're leaving? :shock: What is up with that? (smile smile, wink wink)
Good luck with your many todo's!
poppy
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Hey Pops :) Welcome back.
I agree, too.
About this N's driving us into the ground business... Lighter! They gotta catch us first, you know?
Sometimes all it takes to get "caught" is to open one's mouth.
Keep it zipped and N will hammer self into the ground in no time... no assistance required.
Carolyn
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Beth,
I get off my butt too!!! :D
Hey, Hope!!! Good to hear you!
Pops
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Dear Lighter, Beth, and CB,
Hugs to you; I was in an irreverent mood yesterday and thanks for not being upset with me.
I do not have children yet; it is encouraging to hear that some of you had your little ones close to 40 (I am 37) . I've never felt that I could cope as a single mother, and I kind of feared winding up divorced and depending on my mother for help (ie giving her power to abuse me further). I still hold that fear; its very deep with me. But my urge to love and nurture is so strong, maybe I'll talk my man into having our own little ones soon. I really can't think of anything more fulfilling.
Lighter, hon, the empty nest is part of it. It means that its time to surround yourself with cute baby animals; a dog preferably. See,, its not so bad when you think of it that way, hmm?
Beth, I don't know if what makes me happy would work for you, but to be happiest I need to spend part of my day doing creative things and part of the day with animals or otherwise nurturing another living being (I visit the park and feed the local wild birds each day) . `Nurturing' is so fullfilling to me; perhaps its a woman thing? Creativity is so fullfilling too.
Anyway, i hope that you will find your balance again soon; its not always easy to find ourselves, I know.
X Bella