Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board

Voicelessness and Emotional Survival => Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board => Topic started by: Millie on October 27, 2007, 10:02:13 PM

Title: Leaving
Post by: Millie on October 27, 2007, 10:02:13 PM

I am new to message boards but tonight I decided I am leaving my husband.  It has been 8 years and I have thought about it for over 3 years.  I have a stong family and very supporive group.  No one knows yet.  I hope I do not chicken out. 

He could be a great man if he wanted to be.  He is too self involved and unwililling to consder othes feelings.  That is not my style.

I need a companion who wants to be with me and be a family.

Title: Re: Leaving
Post by: Hopalong on October 27, 2007, 10:21:12 PM

Oh Millie. Welcome.
(We had an earlier Millie...wasn't you?)

This is an important and difficult moment for you.
But congratulations.

Nobody comes to a decision to divorce lightly,
and I'm sure you haven't.

I have to say that I admire you. You are getting
out in time to build a meaningful happy life.

I wouldn't tell anyone who doesn't need to know,
and lean on your support group and trustworthy
friends.

Have you seen an attorney?

Hopalong

Title: Re: Leaving
Post by: DivineSunshine on October 28, 2007, 02:48:17 PM

welcome!  Good for you!  If you feel it ---do it--try to cover as many physical and mental bases as you can and then just do it!  I stayed for way too long and it is a mess getting out for that reason! 

Here for you!  Good luck!

((((((milllie))))))

Sunny

Title: Re: Leaving
Post by: Leah on October 28, 2007, 02:59:23 PM

Dear Millie,

A Safety Plan is vitally important.

Which should include only those whom you are certain that you can trust.

Because when leaving --- you are saying 'no' to someone

the response to 'no' and the fact that you are leaving can most often be unpredictable.

Be on the safe side to stay safe.

Love,

Leah

Title: Re: Leaving
Post by: Ami on October 28, 2007, 03:39:16 PM

Dear Millie,
  If you have supportive family and friends,you are so very fortunate. I think that you can do whatever you need to do if you have your own inner  strength and a good support system.
  I stayed for many years in a marriage that almost destroyed me b/c I had no one to help me and I wasn't strong enough to help myself.
  Let your intuition lead you.                                 Love   Ami

((((((((((((((Millie)))))))))))))))

Title: Re: Leaving
Post by: isittoolate on October 28, 2007, 04:51:18 PM

Hi Millie
No Ifs about it eh? You said

Quote

I have a stong family and very supporive group.

so
Wherever you go, there will be support awaiting you!! Good!!

I left a common-law relationship and there was not nearly the legal matters regarding leaving a marriage.
Those who have been through it are here to help you.

good Luck!
Izzy

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Title: Re: Leaving
Post by: lighter on October 29, 2007, 07:27:13 AM

Hello Millie:

It's a bad feeling to be committed to someone who doesn't cherish you or your family.  You deserve better.

Welcome.