Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board

Voicelessness and Emotional Survival => Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board => Topic started by: lighter on April 03, 2008, 10:37:04 AM

Title: In crisis... but here
Post by: lighter on April 03, 2008, 10:37:04 AM

I haven't been able to post about my situation since the my husband followed me to the board in 2006.

I know this caused confusion in many ways and I apologize for that. 

There were reasons why I couldn't share information.  That's a shame bc there are lessons for those that come after me.  Lessons people can learn from.

I'm not sure I'll be able to post with more clarity anytime soon but please know that I'm back and experiencing crisis and dire circumstances. 

((((((entire board)))))))  Lighter

Title: Re: In crisis... but here
Post by: lighter on April 03, 2008, 10:47:04 AM

Thanks for your support, Amber. 

My time away was filled with terror, shock, fear and uncertainty..... still is.


I'm afraid my world won't ever be OK again......

 knowing the tribe's here, standing next to me, helps so much.

Thank you
 

Title: Re: In crisis... but here
Post by: Ami on April 03, 2008, 11:22:45 AM

I wish you the best possible outcome in your trying circumstances ,Ligher.             Ami

Title: Re: In crisis... but here
Post by: Leah on April 03, 2008, 11:33:23 AM

Warm wishes of good tidings (((( Lighter )))) 

Love, Leah

Title: Re: In crisis... but here
Post by: cats paw on April 03, 2008, 02:26:34 PM

Lighter,

  Standing here, wearing boots.

  I hope you've got 3D people to stand with as well.

cats paw

Title: Re: In crisis... but here
Post by: Chamomile on April 03, 2008, 03:01:44 PM

I'm new here but you have my support.  (((hugs)))

Title: Re: In crisis... but here
Post by: debkor on April 03, 2008, 04:20:03 PM

Hey Light,

It's good to hear from you.  Not to worry.  I missed you.  We understand and you don't have to use words for us to know that your having a hard time. You do not need to explain, we know, no confusion from you to us.

Hang in there Light!!!

We all have your back.

Love
Deb

Title: Re: In crisis... but here
Post by: axa on April 03, 2008, 05:12:31 PM

Hi Lighter,

Hold yourself in the safest way possible,

Thinking of you,


axa

Title: Re: In crisis... but here
Post by: teartracks on April 03, 2008, 07:41:23 PM

Hi lighter,

I'm glad to see you on the board again.  So sorry for the tough situation you're in. 

I think I was hard on you before you left a month or so ago.  I'm sorry for that too.  I pledge to you that if I can't say something  to lift you up, I won't say anything at all.  Sounds a little Thumperish doesn't it?  But I mean it.

I send you my best wishes...

tt

Title: Re: In crisis... but here
Post by: towrite on April 04, 2008, 09:55:35 AM

Let me know where he is and I have two very strong men who'll teach him a lesson.

yours in hip waders,  towrite

((((((lighter))))))

Title: Re: In crisis... but here
Post by: gratitude28 on April 04, 2008, 12:56:54 PM

Please take care lighter. I hope you can find help and safety.
Love, Beth

Title: Re: In crisis... but here
Post by: Hopalong on April 04, 2008, 11:01:32 PM

Breathe in, breathe out, drink water.

(((Lighter)))

3-D support team holding up?

Hops

Title: Re: In crisis... but here
Post by: lighter on April 05, 2008, 11:25:28 AM

Thanks Ami and Leah.

Axa.... I'm doing everything in my power to stay safe and stable.  Under siege but no longer so alone. 

Teartracks.... you don't have to apologize.  I didn't take it personally.  Promise. (((tt)))   

Hops, gratitude, towrite, debkor, Izz and Chamomile..... I think it's easier for people to identify how to help me at this time.  My 3-d community is extending itself and offering very concrete assistance to me and my children.  I'm amazed at the support we're receiving and touched by their willingness to act.  I think, had they known how..... they would have offered help and support long ago.

Hops.... when I'm in crisis I drink water only and must make myself eat.... no appetite.  Afraid to drink coffee, frankly.  My system is so sensitive, smells and caffein are overpowering.  I make coffee and carry it around with me.... savoring the warmth. Thanks for the reminder to stay hydrated.  So important.

My emotions are stabilizing, to some degree.  Huge chemical dumps land on my head when I'm not expecting it but I'm coping..... riding them out as best I can.

Catspaw..... Hops.  Many others..... thank you for extending yourselves when you're dealing with your own crisis and turmoil.  Your strength gives me more hope than you know.  Your support helps me to endure.

Lighter
 

Title: Re: In crisis... but here
Post by: Lupita on April 05, 2008, 11:59:41 AM

Dear Lighter, I am so sorry that you are having problems. I wish there was something I could do for you. Praying for you all the time. Miss you so much!!!!!

The Lord will give you the strenght to continue with the obstacles that life is presenting you at this moment. The Lord will carry you in his arms.

Even in the valley of darkness, The Lord will be your light and guide you parthway, The Lord is your shepherd and will provide for you.


If Jesus is with you, who can be against!!!

My love and my prayers for you.

Title: Re: In crisis... but here
Post by: Overcomer on April 05, 2008, 05:23:07 PM

We are here in heart and soul.  Praying your circumstances turn around.  Not a fun place to be!

Title: Re: In crisis... but here
Post by: lighter on April 05, 2008, 08:12:02 PM

Lupita and overcomer...... thank you for your support, prayers and kind words. 

Lighter

Title: Re: In crisis... but here
Post by: lighter on April 06, 2008, 08:04:21 AM

I have friends coming to stay with me today.  As nice as it is having my children to myself..... (the little one said she feels like we're home again bc it's "just us") it'll be nice to have them here. 

Title: Re: In crisis... but here
Post by: Overcomer on April 06, 2008, 08:37:03 AM

Do not know your circumstances but I remember being at my wits end with my ex and told him I wanted a divorce!  The fireworks started and it was an awful six months.  11 Years have come and gone and everything is ok with him.  But when you are in the midst of it - Wild!  Hope you can get through whatever you are going through with the least bit of anxiety.

Title: Re: In crisis... but here
Post by: flowerpower on April 06, 2008, 05:11:08 PM

Lighter, I know I am new and you do not know me very well, but I want you to know that I am here offering support and hoping for a positive outcome to whatever you are going through.

You are a very strong person and that will help you in your time of crisis. As you ride the waves of those chemical dumps (love that phrasing by the way), please know I and this wonderful group of people are here to support you.

Hoping for peace, wisdom and strength to be your guide as you wade through your current situation.

Title: Re: In crisis... but here
Post by: lighter on April 07, 2008, 09:48:28 PM

I'm afraid it's going to be red alert for a year or more.

Getting back into a routine with my children has helped a lot.

Tonight we had a candlelit picnic on the deck..... a heater for warmth and ice cream for our souls.

Started out with homeade strawberry sorbet but...... L's stuffed elephant and J's little stuffed dog wanted something more, so..... little buttered bread cutouts and the ice cream hit the spot.

I feel like I'm at the bottom of a tremendous mountain.... trying to find strength and resolve to climb to the top.  I'm weak but determined to get my bearings.

I have no choice, frankly.

Thanks for checking on me.

Title: Re: In crisis... but here
Post by: gjazz on April 10, 2008, 08:54:46 PM

lighter:  I'm new here too, but have been terrified and desperate and felt unable to break away from craziness and abuse in my life, so I can relate.  I think it's great that you can keep in touch here, keep as many people hearing you, knowing what's going on, as possible.  And hurray for a legal team!  They're professional bulldogs, let 'em loose.

Title: Re: In crisis... but here
Post by: seasons on April 11, 2008, 12:19:50 AM

(Lighter),
I've missed you.
Sorry you are looking at the mountain from bottom. You are a fighter and will make it to the top.
Keep your children close... may your love for eachother be a beacon for you to find your way.

Praying for you all, keep safe.........seasons

Title: Re: In crisis... but here
Post by: lighter on April 12, 2008, 10:15:50 AM

Amber, g and Seasons....

Thanks for your support.

Really.

Lighter

Title: Re: In crisis... but here
Post by: Lupita on April 12, 2008, 10:19:22 AM

Id there is anything I could do for you, please, let me know.


Love you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Title: Re: In crisis... but here
Post by: lighter on April 12, 2008, 10:46:03 AM

Pray for me and start journaling for yourself?

(((Lupita)))  You still haven't told me how your son's doing.

Title: Re: In crisis... but here
Post by: Lupita on April 12, 2008, 10:52:52 AM

I have to do tell you, let me get back at it later. Long story with my son. But he is alive, will graduate this year college, no drugs, no girl pregnant, what else can I ask?

I will PM you about my son, but when I have the energy to write about that. Not now.

Love to you.

Title: Re: In crisis... but here
Post by: axa on April 13, 2008, 06:04:12 AM

lighter,

Thinking of you and your little ones this morning

xx

axa

Title: Re: In crisis... but here
Post by: lighter on April 13, 2008, 07:56:45 AM

Lupita...... you can talk about your son whenever you're ready.

Axa...... thanks for the kind thoughts.

Lighter