Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board
Voicelessness and Emotional Survival => Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board => Topic started by: Ami on May 14, 2008, 07:09:39 AM
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You have made so much progress ,Lupita. You seem like a different person from way back then with "bad boy" from the dance class. Hate to bring up a subject of ancient history(lol)
However, I SEE your strength.
I would love to hear what you are doing and how it is working. Ami
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Ami,
Funny, I was thinking about Lupita last night. As I was getting ready to go out to a dinner party. I started to feel a little less than,
old tapes of foo.
Then I looked in the mirror and said to myself your o.k., you will be alright.
And I did feel so much better. Self-soothing.
Thought of Lupita with a smile. Thank you Lupita!! love seasons
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it is flattering!!!
First of all and number 1:
Think of your mother as a little girl, scared and with a horrible sensation of abandonement because of the rejection of her own mother. Imagine that she is crying desperately and nobody is helping her. Then you tell her you are here for her, and tell her that she is not alone, that you are big enough to take care of her. Tell her that you will love her forever and that you forgive her anything that she has done to you. Then think that she is as small as the size of your hand, put her in your hand, and then let her go in the air.
Do that several times a day during no less than thirty days.
Number 2:
Mirror work:
Go to the mirror, at least seven times a day and look in to your eyes. Say to your self, loud, I love you!!! I love you!!!!
Then say to your self: I love my self. I want to learn to love my self. I do not have to earn love. I have the right to be loved. I am worthy of love because I exist. I breath because I exist, I am wonderful human being because I exist.
I am not here by accident. God put me here ofr a reason.
IN the same moment that you start saying that you love your self, the process has started.
Then say to your self: five magical words:
I WANT TO FEEL GOOD. I WANT TO FEEL GOOD. I WANT TO FEEL GOOD. I WANT TO FEEL GOOD. I WANT TO FEEL GOOD.
sAY IT LOUD AND SEVERAL TIMES.
At this moment the process has started.
Number 3
Listen to tapes at least two hours a day. I do one hour going to work and one hour coming from work in the car, from Wayn Dyer and Loiuse Hay and others too. When you memorize what they say and repeat it several times, little by little it starts sinking in your brain.
Number 4
Make signs of the affirmations that you want to come to reality, just positive thoughts that you want to change.
Like instead of I hate my job--------> I love my job
Like instead of I cant stand that person -----------> I see many positive things in that person
Like instead of I hate my house it gives me crippy feelings ----------> I see my self in a new house and I intend to have it and work for it in a certain amount of time.
ETC,
Number 5
Meditate
Listen to your heart, to your thoughts catch your self having a negative thought and counter attack it with a positive thought
Think of pleasurable things and positive things that might make you happy.
Relax your muscles.
Number 6
Exercise a lot. Go to bed exhausted of so much work.
More to come.
Thank you for asking.
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Thank you, Lupita. Keep sharing your progress, as you go forward!!! Hugs, Ami
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Lupita,
you
blow
my
mind,
woman!
Wow.
love,
Hops
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Lupita gets the "award" for the "most improved"(lol).Lupita, you inspire me!! Hugs, Ami
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Thank you Ami and Hops.
Number 7
Let go the need to be right. You want to be right or you want to be happy? I want to be happy. I want to feel good. I cannot let other people's opinion define me and tell me how to feel. The opinion of others is beyond my control.
You cannot control what other people think. You cannot control what other people think of you. Their opinion is nothing but thoughts. And that is beyond your control. If you talk to 10 people you have ten opinions, if you talk to 37 people you have 37 opinions. Can I make my students happy? Some times I will make some students happy and some times I will make some students unhappy. Can I control how they feel? No!!!! Should I feel bad for my students who are unhappy? No way Jose!!!!!!!!!!
Let go and let God control your life. He is perfect and he knows better for you.
Number 8
Do not chase your dreams. Just allow them to happen when ever God wants it to. You are not your relationships, "Oh, if I only had a boyfriend who loved me!!!" No!!! If you had a boyfriend who loved you and you do not love your self, youa re going to be unhappy and find deffects in your new boyfriend. "Oh If I only had a good job where I was appreciated!" No!!! If you had a good job and you did not love your self you would end up hating the new job too. Let go and let God control uour life.
Number 9
Be in a constant state of gratitud. For the blood that goes through your veins, for the air that goes through your lungs, for the food that comes to your stonmach, food that probably miserable migrant workers cultivated, and for everything you have.
Never cry for what you do not have. God hears what you are missing and will send you more of what you do not have. But if you are grateful for what you have God will send you more abundance.
Number 10
If you want to attract people who are non judgmental and gentil, and generous and forgiving, you have to forgive, you have to give, you have to refrain from judging and critizicing etc. You attract what you are, and if you want to attract a good person you have to be a good person, if you are selfish you will attract a selfish person, etc.
Thank you for your encouragement!!!! :)
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Lupita,
That was beautiful and healing just to read. I'm going to print this out for me to read each day.
Your and inspiration that change can happen, if only when we choose to do so.
Bless you, seasons
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Seasons, thank you so much for your encouragement, thank you for your kind words. You help me keep going with your kindness.
My love to you!
God bless you!
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Dear Lupita,
What wisdom is in your post. It is true that you can have s/one who really loves you and IF you don't love yourself, it will not go in and make your inner unhappiness go away.I have that and I am still "me".
I know where I want to go. It is to be centered in myself.
Check out the book "Reclaiming your life" AND the Alice Miller website and books. *I* am really healing, too,Lupita.
We are "soul sisters" getting centered and whole,now(lol) Ami
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I was thinking why I always attracted selfish men. I was selfish. Now that I am growing, I am positive that I will attract a good man that is mature and forgiving. If I did not go to church, how can I attract a church goer? We attract what we are. that is why it is so important that we are what we wish to attract.
If we are insecure, there is no possible way we are going to attratc confident friends.
We need to be what we want.
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For example, today, during my nightmare sixth period, which had been good lately, today four kids decided to skip class. When I wrote the referral, I wrote skeeping insted of skipping and they laught at me. I said, I am not native speaker, I have never laught at your Spanish, why do you mock me ofr my English and why do you raise your arms in church and sya Jesus Jesus as if you were a good person when you are not behaving like one.
They said do you love jesus miss lupita? I yelled, yes!!!! This kid is a bully, and I told his mother and I told his girlfriend. And if they make me a big problem for that, I do not care. I know I am telling the truth.
Am I going to feel bad for an SOB? No way Jose!!!!!!! If they do noit appreciate me it is their loss, not mine. I have many students who love me, I am not going to cry for an idiot, ignorant, stupid, hypocrit!!!!!! NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!
As soon as I get home I am going to think in positive things. And feel good. Going to the jaccuzi and the swiming pool and have fun.
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Am I going to feel bad for an SOB? No way Jose!!!!!!! If they do noit appreciate me it is their loss, not mine. I have many students who love me, I am not going to cry for an idiot, ignorant, stupid, hypocrit!!!!!! NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So proud of you.
As soon as I get home I am going to think in positive things. And feel good. Going to the jaccuzi and the swiming pool and have fun.
Sounds wonderful, Enjoy Lupita! 8)
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Seasons!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You always make me feel better. Thank you. God bless you!!!
How are you seasons? Hos is everything going with you?
My love to you!
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We attract what we are.
I think you're right, Lupita.
If our trouble is the topmost thing in our lives, then we'll attract an inversely troubled person.
If joy and engagement, then we'll attract someone who also has joy and engagement.
Thanks for this.
Hugs and a happy happy weekend to you,
Hops
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Hi Hops, absolutly, agree with you.
For example, if you are a person very strict and you follow the rules and respect others and have high moral standards, (I do), do you think you are going to feel attracted to a person who is trying to bit the system? parking in disable spots? contanstly overdriving his bank account? No!!!!!! I dont think so!
And it is the same with other kind of qualities. If you like to play cards, probably you will have more in common with somebody who plays cards.
Or if you like the beach and your dates hates the sun, and the sand, and the salty water, how do you think you are going to like it? I dont think so.
And so on..... probably it is affinity.
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Hi Hops, absolutly, agree with you.
For example, if you are a person very strict and you follow the rules and respect others and have high moral standards, (I do), do you think you are going to feel attracted to a person who is trying to bit the system? parking in disable spots? contanstly overdriving his bank account? No!!!!!! I dont think so!
And it is the same with other kind of qualities. If you like to play cards, probably you will have more in common with somebody who plays cards.
Or if you like the beach and your dates hates the sun, and the sand, and the salty water, how do you think you are going to like it? I dont think so.
And so on..... probably it is affinity.
Thanks for sharing this Lupita. I always hear that two opposites attract, which I'm sure is exciting for a short time. BTDT not lasting. lol
Funny though my husband and I are a lot alike. Share the same values, parenting, activities etc. and we are very happy and very much in love, 21 years and counting. Maybe this is why? love seasons
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Thank you seasons. That si where I am. Working on it. Working on detachmente and working on let go and working on forgiveness. Very important steps to live. To be able to survvive.
Let go fo the past. To survive. The past is heavy baggage uf you carry it around you end up destruiying your body and your soul. I just came around three months ago, out from very dark, sad, and lonely life.
Lupita
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(((( Lupita ))))
Truly, I am so very happy for you.
God Bless You every step of the way ahead.
Love,
Leah
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Lea, thank you. I think I screwed up today. I am so jealouse of my son's GF that I keep making negative comments about her. I know it is bad, I know it is bad, I know it. I have to stop. I have to detach from that. I want to give peace to my son. I need for him to enjoy the moments he spends with me. It is just such an obsession to say negative things about her. Please, God forgive me and allow me to be a better mother and allow me to accept that woman, because I do not have a choice. Please. God, help me accept what i cant change. I dislike her so much! I have to change the way I view her so I can feel less negative about her. After all, it is his choice, not mine. God help me!!!!
Anyway, now he is gone, he is with the girl friend. I smiled to her and gave her a hug but I know that all day I was talking sh*t about it to my poor son, who was stoically putting up with me.
God, forgive me please.
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Lupita,
God has already given you the strength. Look at you, you are speaking the truth, right from your heart.
Even admitting you maybe over did it with your son.
Just recognising this is a testament to your unconditional love for you son. He is very blessed.
You know what you can control and what you cannot. Like GF. It must be very hard not to like her, my heart really goes out to you.
I know you want your son close and not push him away with bad GF talk. I understand. (((Hugs)))
Kudos for giving a smile and a hug. Your trying so hard.
Just a thought, rant all you want about GF right here!
I will pray for you Lupita. seasons
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Seasons, you have a great idea.
I dont like her because she is good for nothing, she watches soup operas, she does not read, she does not work, she only goes to college, her mother provides her with everything, she does not talk to me, she does not convers with mne, she always ognores me, she does not go out with my son and I, she never wabts to do anything as a family together, she does not like salty water, she dopes not like to swim, she does not exercise, she has a credit cartd that her mother pays, she does not want to walk, she goes to the mall and buys a lot of clothing, she does not play an instrument, she is empty, she does not go to church, and her mother is a selfish narcissistic bitch and this girl is asperger.
Thank you for listening.
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God forgive me.
I am lableling her. Calling her Asperger. I will not do that again. Please forgive me. I will not do it again.
I call her ertarded. She is not retarded, she is just very slow, but who am I to call her. She is just stilling my baby from me. It is his life, he has the right to have somebody to love him. I feel so bad. Please, God forgive me.
Please God forgive me for torturing my son all day yesterday. I am so jealouse!!!!!!!!!!!! :evil: :oops:
Sorry so much sorry.
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For healing, I am concentrating on feeling better after I was disgusted by GFM and her egotistic slefish narcissistic attitude.
I almost feel good now after a few minutes. I know after I go to the jaccuzi and swim and have a drink, I will feel wonderful.
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Forgive yourself, Lupita...
You don't mean to be so jealous, it's just a very powerful feeling you're having trouble handling.
Maybe when you're feeling it you could always be sure to separate...back away...go do something healing and fulfilling for yourself until you feel balanced again. Like go to a museum and spend an hour in silence with the art, or walk in nature, or go to a Migun dealer for a free relaxing thermal massage, or go to a new church and listen to the choir, or go for a dance class.
As soon as the feeling comes up, you have an appointment with yourself for some self-nurturing.
Hope that might help, ignore if it doesn't...
love to you,
Hops
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Gracias Hopalong. It is 5:00 AM and been up since 2:00 am thinking of GFM, and how she is going to impact my life at church. If she gives money (she has money) they are going to adore her, and I am employed by the church. I have the sneaky suspition that she is going to be a member just to exercise control over me. What a bitch.