Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board
Voicelessness and Emotional Survival => Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board => Topic started by: cgm1028 on October 04, 2009, 11:46:54 PM
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I fills me with such good feelings as I see how each of us supports our sisters on this board. And we have also been supportive elsewhere. Take note my sisters!! Because we are here and embrace eachother we are not like the narc in our lives. We have survived and we are strong. And we have recognized how we have been poorly treated and WE will not treat anyone like that.
Pat yourselves on the back. The very fact that you are here means you are different!!
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Yes, we are awesome. I had a minor epiphany today while waiting in line at the mall for one of those blended, all sugar, flavored coffee drinks...
Anyway, there was a woman in front of me who seemed nice, nicer actually than her looks (my judgmental attitude is 100% from my NMother who always picked people and their outfits apart. She always says she's never insulted me - she doesn't have to - by insulting everyone else, I already know before I put the outfit on what she is thinking;)
As I was standing there - it occurs to me that Nism is alot like colors. We've been deprived of knowing our voice, our COLOR and its SHADE and you could buy 100 designer outfits, but if its not just the right color and shade for YOU, you wont be fabulous. As people who've been berated by Ns we don't know ourselves well enough to know the shade, or worse, we've been misled, manipulated into thinking theres an opinion that comes with "that" color (i.e meaning us). I can look back at old pictures and see where I've let my prettier self dull by the clothes I wore and hairstyles I chose. I am much more than that - and sometimes you can see it... my point is that when you say we are awesome, we are, not because we live with Nism in our life but because this wound gives us a chance to know our SHADES. I think the healing is in the revealing and the more you know about yourself, it means you are willing to increase your self respect... and in so doing will increase the level of the people you attract into your life.
I've always thought I was red, now I know I'm green and I am just learning which shades of green are right for me to move on in life...
Does this make any sense?
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Yes, we are awesome. I had a minor epiphany today while waiting in line at the mall for one of those blended, all sugar, flavored coffee drinks...
Anyway, there was a woman in front of me who seemed nice, nicer actually than her looks (my judgmental attitude is 100% from my NMother who always picked people and their outfits apart. She always says she's never insulted me - she doesn't have to - by insulting everyone else, I already know before I put the outfit on what she is thinking;)
As I was standing there - it occurs to me that Nism is alot like colors. We've been deprived of knowing our voice, our COLOR and its SHADE and you could buy 100 designer outfits, but if its not just the right color and shade for YOU, you wont be fabulous. As people who've been berated by Ns we don't know ourselves well enough to know the shade, or worse, we've been misled, manipulated into thinking theres an opinion that comes with "that" color (i.e meaning us). I can look back at old pictures and see where I've let my prettier self dull by the clothes I wore and hairstyles I chose. I am much more than that - and sometimes you can see it... my point is that when you say we are awesome, we are, not because we live with Nism in our life but because this wound gives us a chance to know our SHADES. I think the healing is in the revealing and the more you know about yourself, it means you are willing to increase your self respect... and in so doing will increase the level of the people you attract into your life.
I've always thought I was red, now I know I'm green and I am just learning which shades of green are right for me to move on in life...
Does this make any sense?
It makes sense that you had to throw off your identity with an NM. You had to be acceptable to her in order to survive.You lost your true self.Now,you are finding it again with your beautiful , green clothed self ! Ami
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I fills me with such good feelings as I see how each of us supports our sisters on this board. And we have also been supportive elsewhere. Take note my sisters!! Because we are here and embrace eachother we are not like the narc in our lives. We have survived and we are strong. And we have recognized how we have been poorly treated and WE will not treat anyone like that.
Pat yourselves on the back. The very fact that you are here means you are different!!
(((cgm))) It is so nice to have hope to be different than the N's plan for our life! xxoo Ami
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Hi cgm!
How lovely that was to read. What a generous heart you have, thank you for sharing your inner thoughts with the board.
Kindnesses sent right back at you! seasons