Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board
Voicelessness and Emotional Survival => Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board => Topic started by: Sealynx on October 24, 2009, 12:41:41 PM
-
I am curious if anyone else shares some of my dream imagery. I've met few people whose dreams are similar. I wonder if some of it could be related to my upbringing. Here are some of the odd elements.
1. Highly symbolic dreams.
2. Dreams in which I don't know anyone in them from this life but feel very close to the people as if I know them in another.
3. Dreams that contain an invisible force or ghost.
4. Dreams in which only animals appear and often represent people.
-
Hi Sealynx,
Ever since I was a child I had dreams that were highly symbolic and sometimes predictive (with the traditional pop culture interpretation).
I never had dreams with invisible forces or ghosts, or animals.
But I dream of NM quite often and strangely enough a couple of days later she makes a contact attempt.
P.
-
Persephone,
We had a conversation a while back on another board about how many of us had moms who were psychic. The idea was that we had to hide our feelings that much deeper. I never dream of mine but she always calls when I'm down. Of course she usually calls and starts an argument and the last thing she wants if for to tell her what I'm feeling..
S
-
Not sure you read in any of my posts that NM is involved in various occult practices. Unfortunately I believe in this stuff a lot and she is very linked to what I m doing. In fact, a lot of weird things happen. Greek culture unfortunately revolves a lot around witchcraft. And I am really scared of what she does as strange things happen. e.g. last week when she saw my blog and started cursing she sad 'you did your page to write about me but nobody really pays you any attention': since then I have not had a single email coming, not even to the ones I sent out for various reasons throughout the week. Not sure if this is something you believe in Sealynx but she does scare me a lot. Her practice is pretty much 'if I can't have you, then no one will'.
Last year when I got together with someone I went to school with (we were not a couple then) and broke up out of the blue, a man I still love very much so even if we are not together, I had recurrent dreams of him trying to ring me in the family home I spent from age 8 to 16 and him coming to talk to me and she always either took the call or was present in the conversation without knowing him in real life.
Someone calling when you are down could be a good thing - someone cares, they feel you are not feeling well and ring you to offer solace, support etc. But I guess with psychic NMs is a completely diffrerent story? They would seize the opportunity to take one down a peg or two...
-
I think NWomb-Donors who claim they are psychic, to use as an excuse to abuse you more, are psychos! :P
Bones
-
Yep Bones
Mine always claimed to be 'physic'. Frankly this was just part of her delusional behaviour. Or if you want to put it another way, it was b*ll*cks.
-
Persephone,
I firmly believe that thoughts and emotions have an energy that can be harmful, especially if you are willing to let it harm you. We agree to give people the emotional control they have over us and it can be deadly. People die of heart attacks every year because they allow their boss or spouse to abuse them to death. I also believe that no one is more powerful than anyone else, just more focused. "Magic" is a mind game and you have just as much power to draw good things to you as she has to remove them. The best defense is not an offense but a reflective technique. When you think she is up to something, mentally envision her surrounded with mirrors facing toward her. Whatever she throws comes back at her. If its good...good. If it is bad...it goes nowhere but back to her. Keep a ring of imaginary mirrors around you, your web page or whatever needs protecting, that is facing out. Program them to reflect negative energies and magnify the good. Stay focused no matter what she does.
-
I read an article in which they tested people's personality traits and then asked them about their interpersonal sensitivity skills, and then they actually tested their interpersonal sensitivity. People high in narcissism thought they were personally very sensitive to other people, much more than subjects that were not high in narcissism. However, the people high in narcissism actually scored very low on interpersonal sensitivity when they were tested on it. So, they think they are very "sensitive" (psychic?) and yet are not.
Have any of you read the book "The People of the Lie" by M. Scott Peck? I just finished reading it and it is spot-on with what people on this board have experienced with narcissistic parents/spouses/siblings/etc. Basically his definition of evil is that their destructiveness is a persistent pattern,and that because they wish to be seen as good, they lie about everything and twist everything to justify their destructiveness. Which of course is what we discuss here on this forum all the time. Peck points out that Jesus called Satan "the Father of lies." I have never encountered such a clear and understandable explanation of evil. And, BTW, the book is not scary or upsetting (at least, not in the sense of a Stephen King book or something).
Peck also talks about magic ... that it is basically when people manipulate other people instead of being up-front. In other words, in the classic magic sense, "casting a spell" is an attempt to make somebody do something that they don't want to do or otherwise wouldn't do. So, whether or not somebody has the actual POWER to make something magical happen, the intent is just what we experience with N people everyday --- trying to twist the situation in order to manipulate others into doing what they want. Acting deceptively (lying in word or deed) to get their own selfish desires fulfilled.
-
Dear Heart
That is one of my favorite books! xxoo Ami
-
Heart this is one of my favourite books and thanks for pointing out the part about magic - have I missed it?
I am shocked with the story of the parents who gifted their son the shotgun which his brother used to kill himself and the explanation they gave blutantly say 'but he wanted a shotgun'.
There is somewhere an essay on Peck's discoveries that I quote below from a website on N:
Scott Peck describes for us the characteristics of the personality disorder that encompasses evil:
consistent destructive scapegoating, often subtle
excessive, usually covert intolerance to criticism
pronounced concern with public image, denial of vengeful motives
intellectual deviousness with likelihood of mild schizoid disturbance
CHILDREN and EVIL
(the child living in the midst of evil) can emotionally survive only by a massive fortification of its psyche. While....essential for survival through childhood, they distort and compromise its life as an adult....Children of evil parents enter adulthood with very significant psychiatric disturbances. To come to terms with evil in one's parentage is perhaps the most difficult and painful psychological task a human being can be called on to face. Most fail and remain its victims. Those who succeed in developing the necessary searing vision are those who can name it. "To come to terms" means to "arrive at the name."
SURVIVING EVIL
Evil then must be named. Doing so can be enormously frightening. It means that some of us must do battle with a force that wants to destroy us.
The ones in most need of help and support are those that choose or must stay with a narcissist, and those that divorce them. Divorce a narcissist and you will find every characteristic magnified and enlarged. Divorce a narcissist with a narcissistic lawyer and you are the victim of a reign of terror. It does not have to be divorce, it could be any lawsuit or other such campaign. It is the opposition, the challenge to their narcissist's world view, the need to control that unleashes the campaign to destroy.
There were no examples in Dr. Peck's book that appeared to be as evil as that I have seen. I have seen evil that has torn a child from normality, taken the voice of the child so he could not speak and impaled such jolts of evil that the child would awake in terror screaming. "They're throwing javelins at me, oh, the pain, the pain" and clutch his heart and chest in agony. He would then fall into a coma like sleep for hours.
Evil leaves its mark at the cellular level. There is a physiology to evil. Cells are imprinted at the moment terror engulfs us. Brain cells are destroyed by stress and facing evil is neverending stress. The body never leaves flight or fight mode. Children silently suffer the slings and arrows of the narcissistic parent who is unable to care. What happens to the child is of no concern to the narcissist, he must prevail no matter the cost. The child as collateral damage is unimportant. Winning is everything.
-
Persephone,
That shotgun incident is what sticks in my mind about the book decades after reading it!!
-
The dreams I've had are weird, they are me reliving a moment from the eighth grade and winning a race. I have this recurring dream where in a track meet, I pass the girl ahead of me (which in reality I did) and continue to accelerate my pace until she is so far behind me she cant catch up. I then win the race. The real story is that in eight grade, I was the fastest miler on the track team. I set a school record, but as luck would have it - I've never won a race and come in first. Second is the best I've ever gotten. In that race I'm describing, I passed a girl and we went to battle it out for first place. She won, by a few yards just before the finish line but we were both running a slow day so her time was much slower than my record (and so was my time! :() So while she's technically beaten me and got a first place, she never passed my school record. Its kind of awkward to say I was the fastest in that event and yet have never won. I set the school record at a county meet - the times were so fast there everyone set a Personal Record and I came in 2nd.
Also, it doesn;t help that she was a much more popular girl than me... and my cat had just died. My parents told me to dedicate the race to "socks" the cat, but that was added pressure I did not need.
I also have one dream where I land every triple jump I've ever tried. I've discovered that my obsession with skating (which is something I abandoned when I was 9) was because its about being beautiful, strong, graceful with nerves of steel. None of those qualities I have and wish I did!!! Its all about an "I'll show you attitude" that I dont have!!
-
Ales, I am not into dream interpretation so I don't know if my input is worth much but ...
* Could your dreams be a sign that you have not given up hope of winning?
* Could your dreams be a sign that you still have the will to win?
Athletes say they have to be able to visualize themselves winning (or doing the perfect ski run, skating routine, etc.) before they can actually perform. There actually is a subfield of psychology dedicated to the mental elements of winning athletic competitions.
Jung believed that dreams have universal content; Freud certainly applied universal interpretations to people's dreams. I'm not so sure myself ... the elements of your dreams could have meanings that only apply to you. In other words, a cigar is not always a cigar, either in waking or dreaming, if you know what I mean.
But the fact that we have all experienced parents that twisted everything that happened so that they were right and others were wrong, that we were damned if we did and damned if we didn't ... that sounds like fighting ghosts to me. Something that is very real and very damaging but you can't quite put your finger on.
-
Yep Bones
Mine always claimed to be 'physic'. Frankly this was just part of her delusional behaviour. Or if you want to put it another way, it was b*ll*cks.
B*ll*cks or, in the American vernacular, BS, it all adds to the fact that NWomb-Donors are just plain CUCKOO IN THE HEAD!!!!!
Bones
-
Hi Heart - great observations and input, thank you. I think you are very right that I have not given up hope of winning. But, I can also say that success to me, would be being free of all the limitations (my Nms critical voice) so I can just do what I am truly capable of, win or lose. My lack of assertiveness and inability to stand up to others is the reason why I've had trouble with work and the low self esteem of not being good enough meant I was not ready for a relationship, because I had not accepted my true self. Its gotten better over the year and I hope it will continue.
I also agree with the comments on Jung, Freud and athletes visualization - its all true! As luck would have it my birthday is May 6 - same day as Dr. Freud. Its also the same day (May 6 1954) that Roger Bannister broke the 4 minute mile barrier. If you know the story, a scientist had predicted that it was in fact possible for man to run a sub-4 mile, shortly after the track community accepted this finding Bannister broke the record and so did many others. I think its not a coincidence that I was born May 6th.
Thanks for your support!
-
Hi Ales,
You gave your birthdate here and in the Christmas post you said you were 41. I'm an astrologer so I couldn't help taking a peek at your chart to see what the stars had to say about you and Banister. I've woven my dream interpretation into it so if you aren't an astrology buff just leave that part out!!
Bannister had mars in Capricorn which suggests that he craved coming out on top and had a great deal of stamina and physical ambition turned toward getting there. This sign will butt a brick wall until it falls or in this case, a record. Both of you have Sun/Mercury in Taurus meaning that you can set you mind on something and not budge an inch when its important.
Your use of Mars is very different. Yours conjuncts Mercury and is opposed by Neptune the planet of beauty, creativity and intuition. When Neptune opposes mercury the thinking becomes intuitive and the focus softer. Physically grace is encouraged more than stamina when it opposes mars. It is not surprising that you liked figure skating because dance should be enjoyable for you. I hope you have kept some form of dance movement in your life. You are a much more Taurus personality than he was with Venus Sun Mars and possibly mercury there too, depending on what time you were born. You are probably much more likely to stop and smell the roses than we was and would probably place a delicious meal and a dip in the hot tub over another hour of training.
You probably do have a great deal of stick-to-it-tiveness with all that Taurus and this could be why you are still rerunning that race in your head. Try giving some thought to the idea that even if you "could" have run it better, you may have other talents that you are neglecting by judging your self so strongly by this second place performance. To me the dream is telling you to let some "second place finishes" in life go and by doing so honor your true calling.
-
Dear Sealynx
That is so interesting that you are an astrologer. I had my chart done a few times and it was right on. I have studied it as an amatuer and it is fascinating! xxooAmi
-
I became interested in Astrology and Tarot when I was 12. I ran a board for astrologers for quite a few years.
-
Dear Sealynx
How has astrology helped you or hurt you in your every day life--relationships etc? Ami
-
Hi Ami,
Before I answer that...some background here.....
As a child, having been largely cut off from my feelings and made to feel bad and wrong, I did the logical thing and assumed that I must be offending God. My parents couldn't be wrong so they must know some things about religion that I didn't. So I turned my mind to figuring out religion. As early as 6th grade I'd read enough about the history of my parents religion to come to some serious conclusions about what I believed and what I didn't. What I found instead was a great deal of unpleasant church history. Many of these early father (always men!!) seemed to be more like my mother that any God I could conceive of. For a while I felt like I must be evil. Other children found me strange, my parents didn't like me and the stress of it all was causing me to act out in ways that meant I didn't much like me either.
It was then that I somehow discovered the work of Edgar Cayce. Even though he lived and died as a protestant, his wonderful loving view of the universe and the knowledge available from our "higher self" gave me permission to look to myself for guidance. That higher self drew me immediately to book on astrology and a tarot deck the first time I entered a bookstore. I didn't even know what they were...I just knew I wanted those things and my mother bought them for me without even asking what they were.
When I was able to do my own chart, I was amazed that it knew me so well. It also told me lots of good things about myself. These were things I'd suspected but was not able to confirm in my home environment. So astrology became my sounding board. The tarot cards were very interesting and enlightening as well. The first time I read for anyone else was when I was 18 and my intuition was dead on about the affair my friends father was having. Unfortunately I was coaxed into reading at a party when everyone was drinking and didn't take my ability to read for others seriously. She was quite embarrassed!
Have they ever hurt me? Never. They supported my development as a self-sustaining human being. I can't say that they would do that for everyone and there are unscrupulous readers so I don't advocate that everyone run to a psychic or astrologer. Astrology is pretty straight forward, you either have the moon in cancer of you don't and the meaning of that is pretty well agreed upon. Tarot reading is an art form and interpretations can vary with the skill, honesty and introspective ability of the reader, especially when reading for self. If you are determined to see things only one way, you will read the cards that way. Openness to other ways of seeing a situation is important.
Today I always ask anyone I am serious about knowing for their chart, especially if they are relationship material. My question is not, "is this a love match". I want to know what the challenges are in the relationship and what I can possibly learn from the person.
-
That is so interesting Sealynx! What are your sun ,moon, and ascendent? Can you see patterns in your chart that correspond to your life? When I had mine done, it showed a hard relationship with M and H and easy one with kids.That has been true. It really shows the different parts to a person and how you have to struggle to make them a whole.
Ami
-
I think for every hardship in a chart there is a perk of some kind. I'm a triple Capricorn (Sun, Mercury, Asc) with Moon in Taurus and Venus and Mars in Aquarius. There are squares to the communication style from the planet representing my father and the strongest square in the chart which is almost exact is between my moon and venus, both symbols of my mother. That one runs from the first house of self to the fourth house of home and family. This suggests needs that are at odds, emotional security vs the need for complete freedom in relationships. That pretty much sums up the effect of my mother suffocating me one minute and being ignoring the next!
Since I had no emotional security in childhood and the moon was initially strong (conjunct the IC or 4th house cusps), I sought security in early relationships only to feel trapped because I need a great deal of personal freedom and time along to paint and write. Over the last 10 years Uranus and Neptune have transited over my venus and squared the moon, making me want to express my venus which is more connected to my talents and abilities. That has allowed me to back away from relationships and release the need to rely heavily on others. This has been very good for me.
I don't want to clog Dr. G's board with astro stuff, but if you are interested in learning more about your chart, go to www.astro.com and join that site. Major astrologers like Liz Green and Robert Hand are affiliated with it. You can join at a higher level for money but there is no charge to keep a file there with 50 charts or so. After you have entered your chart click on the forum and start a thread in one of the forums. Many newbie and experienced astrologers usually comment on the charts and will give you some great insights.
-
Thank you ((((Sealynx)))) I love astrology! xxoo Ami