Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board

Voicelessness and Emotional Survival => Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board => Topic started by: seasons on March 10, 2010, 08:48:02 PM

Title: this is much harder
Post by: seasons on March 10, 2010, 08:48:02 PM

than the toddler years. Why didn't anyone tell me. Parenting is hard.

I have three teenagers one almost 20.

Where are the directions?  LOL.........sniff............LOL............sniff...sniff...    That's how I feel...lost, scared, excited.

It hurts as I try and find my compass. Funny I know they will be fine as they find theirs. They are much stronger and wiser.

I've made so many mistakes, still make them, kick to self!!!

Any advice, good books etc. for support

Title: Re: this is much harder
Post by: river on March 11, 2010, 07:46:59 AM

Faber and Mazlish are my favourites so far.  The focus is on younger children, but I think the principles remain mucn the same:
'How to talk so kids will listen and listen so kids will talk'
Liberated p;arents liberated children'
'Siblingw without rivalry'


good luck

Title: Re: this is much harder
Post by: Ami on March 11, 2010, 09:16:36 AM

Trust your gut (((((Seasons))))     x o x o       Ami

Title: Re: this is much harder
Post by: Lucky on March 11, 2010, 09:42:05 AM

I found this website but I have no idea if it is any good: http://parentingteens.about.com/

Title: Re: this is much harder
Post by: Nonameanymore on March 11, 2010, 10:18:46 AM

hi seasons,

I don't have (unfortunately) any kids myself so have no advice.
But i can cheer you up by saying that the actor hugh laurie once said about raising kids that they come with a manual with missing/missprinted pages!

hang in there
P xxx

Title: Re: this is much harder
Post by: swimmer on March 11, 2010, 10:18:32 PM

I have a toddler, not teenagers.... I'm hoping this is practice for it;).

I've heard of the similarities between toddlers and teenagers, asserting and finding the balance between independance and needing your parents.  I can't give any advice really as a new parent.... But I know for my toddler daughter, the more choices she gets to make the better day we have together.  Low blood sugar, lack of sleep, and teething don't help.  I pick my battles and sacrifice consistancy at times to build Her confidence.  I think teenagers try on different things to figure out who they are.... and also throw some hormones in there!  Teenagers diet doesn't help this either!!  Just take care of yourself and you will be an example, no matter what they say or do, they are watching and listening with hidden admiration they'll never admit.  If we can long for a toxic parent, just think what there is room for.
I guess as opposed to toddlerhood, teenagers are testing the boundaries of life.... toddlers are testing the boundaries of thepeople around them.  I might be wayyy off, but my experience working with children and new parenthood came up with this.  

Be nice to yourself:)).  You deserve it Mommy.