Recent Posts

41

Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: The Lake House

« Last post by lighter on November 22, 2024, 09:28:42 PM »

Yesterday the HVAC guy blew soot out of the gas furnace.  I want to cry when I contemplate getting those sooty footprints off the tile.  It's everywhere in the mechanical room. 

That fixed the furnace problem till temps dropped into the 30s.  That was an expensive, last, attempt to limp along with that unit.

$4500 later, we were lucky a new furnace could be installed today. I'm cleaning the main wooden louvered slat returns, 3 of them, choked with dust. 

The tv problem was easily solved.....checked the electric panel.  Several circuits were flipped.

The smell in the family room closet....😭.  So so so bad ...dead mouse ...dead.... something.  I had the HVAC guy look at the little service area....when I tried the room spun and spun and spun.  We all think it's dead animal.  My plan is to add an eye hook and zip tie that closet shut.... the smell remains contained, that way.  Will put 4 luggage racks.  There's a huge dresser and armour for clothes....door hooks for hanging.  Will be ok, but had to talk myself out of a tree every time that smell hit me 😭.

So....heat ✔️
Dead animal stench ✔️
Laundry done  ✔️

Beds half complete, but must get extra small beds out and made.  Considering setting them up in heated garage this time, giving them their own tv.  Will see.

Sixteen guests arrive for Thanksgiving week.  If I have time I'll put up some pine garland on front door and main fireplace upstairs.  No lights.  Nails already in place.

I'm feeling really off....my brain feels like it's jiggling in me brain pan, along with increased vertigo activity.  Driving is exhausting , bc I have to focus SO HARD.

I'll try the maneuver you sent, Hops.  Again.  The first time I whacked my head so hard on bedrails, I saw stars.  I'll choose bedrails free bed tomorrow and get on with it.

SO windy here.....and cold.  Snowed back home.....winter's coming.

Lighter

42

Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: The Lake House

« Last post by sKePTiKal on November 22, 2024, 09:14:28 AM »

Berkey is the correct spelling. And one must be discerning about which filter one buys. They have both carbon and ceramic. I lean both ways, depending on the water situation - which is why independent testing is so important in my process. I have both filters. Haven't needed to use it even with my heavy iron water.

And it's snowing this morning; windy and COLD. People are knitting hats & mittens for distribution in WNC. But I hear troubling reports (true? one doesn't know these days) that the people building and donating tiny houses are having them condemned/confiscated by local inspectors. Even as the shelters are being closed down. I don't know what I believe. I want to be eyes on, myself, before deciding what is true.

But today's challenge is driving 4 hrs into the mountains & back to retrieve some customized items before prime hunting season next week. The whole state basically shuts down. And barometric pressure is down to hurricane levels here; bringing in a dusting of snow and cold windy weather. Not fun driving in a jeep. But Rudi has learned to tack into the wind... so here we go!

Propane tank is fixed. Cheap, too. Now to get it filled.

43

Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: The Lake House

« Last post by Hopalong on November 21, 2024, 03:25:45 PM »

Be a great time to use a Burkee for household drinking water....

hugs
Hops

44

Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Captain's Log - 2024

« Last post by sKePTiKal on November 21, 2024, 11:27:46 AM »

Well, that didn't go well at all. After 90 minutes I had to leave the building for fresh air. On my way back in, B was wobbling out with a name of orthopedic surgeon he was getting referred to. Has a couple bandages where doc TRIED to cut thru the scar tissue. Not possible for him.

Ortho surgeon is way the hell in Manassas/Fredericksburg. Has a good reputation but I despise that area and no longer drive into that mess. There are closer docs in WMC in the city over the mountain. I'll be calling them first, with a stack o' questions about insurance and first available appt for a consult as we explain the situation. Maybe today - but I have a new propane company here (local guys) fixing my leaky tank. If not, then Monday.

B was asleep by 2; and basically slept till some time on Wed. Whatever sedative they gave him didn't sit well. Followed by the usual migraine. So we're discussing next steps. He's in a better mood today and I made comfort food last night.

Might have more friends around Thanksgiving week. The excavator friend of Hol's who's been here a lot recently got custody of his son via a CPS investigation of his ex-wife. Logan is 5. Been through a LOT already. Friend will want to work, and Hol & I will entertain the little boy. And of course, B is around. So menu is on my mind, including baking. Bread & cookies, as well as pies. They won't be visiting family, as far as we've heard to date. And it's still possible Amy's young men - my grandsons - could arrive for a visit too. Good chance to get one of those briskets cut up & cooked.

Dreamed it had snowed, too.

SO life is just a combo of everything these days.

45

Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Developing A Personality

« Last post by sKePTiKal on November 19, 2024, 07:43:30 AM »

It might be time simplify and let some thing "go" in the everyday to-do list.

This morning I don't have time to washup last night's dishes. So be it; they'll wait till we get home. I find we regularly eat 30 or less different meals - and I've discovered some shortcut casseroles, for days neither of us have much energy. Eventually, I'm making a list and a rotation schedule, I swear it! It also reduces the amount of pantry items to store. I will plan ahead/buy extra ingredients for "special meals" that I only make occasionally because they take so much time to prepare.

B just naturally makes a mess in my space, because of all his tools & gadgets; we still haven't been able to organize actual useful space yet. I live with it - up to a point when my OCD takes over - and it's usually bearable.

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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: The Lake House

« Last post by sKePTiKal on November 19, 2024, 07:34:02 AM »

Glad you got water back! But I'd be extra careful and have it tested by an independent lab. I've heard MANY reports about the floods dispersing local toxins around. You don't need any additional complications.

47

Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Captain's Log - 2024

« Last post by sKePTiKal on November 19, 2024, 07:29:59 AM »

Fingers & toes crosses, candles lit, a few pulses of good thoughts throughout the day would be most appreciated! This morning is B's change of stimulator leads location. If we make it a week without side effects, the actual change may be approved/ordered/etc.

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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Developing A Personality

« Last post by Twoapenny on November 19, 2024, 06:06:32 AM »

What comes of mastering one's own "have to's"?

For me, there's a sense of accomplishment and PEACE in a tidy and clean house. Add a good meal to the list, and I feel certain I'm "good enough" as a human being to hold forth opinion-wise on most any other topic. Full wood racks, is B's way of getting there; pulling the weeds from winter garden too. (He's getting ready to till it again before it freezes.) Everything ELSE besides those "taking care of one's self the best way I know how" is all gravy; it's extra icing on the cake.

I certainly wish I'd figured this out sooner in life. I chased the "big dreams" (at the expense of more important lifttle things) for far too long... and the "prize" for those big things was a false promise. Empty. Those things were like ego-bait; kept me on the treadmill too long. No wonder my stress levels and anxiety were off the chart then!

There's a huge change in my perspective on life since Mike died. Being on my own. Finally being able to forge my own path - sometimes willy-nilly, sometimes outlined in mass detail. Having more head-space (not so many people taking up room in it) allows me to naturally gravitate to tapping into the creative side of me, too. I feel I know the space I occupy on the planet way better; my "purpose" is well integrated with how I spend my time; and I'm able to manage the various accidents/things that pop up or don't go well, a lot better. I know where the boundary is between me and the rest of world without having to puzzle it out or try to make clearer, less fuzzy. And that all feels real good and doesn't take any energy.

Yes to all of that, Skep, especially the head space.  That's more important than actual time, I find.  I might have an hour when son is doing something else but if my head is full of a dozen things I don't use that hour in the way that might be best for me.  Clearing head space is a definite bonus and yes, that does mean reducing the number of people in various states of crisis.  The funny thing I've noticed over the last couple of days is that I've had three people I've not spoken to for a while get in touch out of the blue - for nice conversations, not that they're necessarily problem free in their lives but they deal with them, rather than dumping and repeating.  It's been nice and unexpected.

Definite yes to a clean house and a good meal.  My current struggle is the age old one of not enough hours in the day.  There's just too much for me to do by myself, so major jobs around the house will mean day to day stuff not getting done, catching up on day to day stuff will mean not doing much with son, having a full day with son will mean no down time for me, and so on.  So currently trying to find ways to simplify and reduce basic tasks, alter routines with son to make things a bit more manageable, try and fit in my daily essentials before he gets up in the morning and that sort of thing.  Just trying to find a way to make it all work so that there is a sense of having 'done', instead of always feeling 'that will have to do for now' and knowing the list is just as long tomorrow.

I find it harder to disconnect from people who haven't done anything wrong.  If someone is selfish or abusive someway cutting ties makes absolute sense but when it's more that they're not bringing much to your life it feels different, especially when they have genuine problems.  But - my energy reserves are empty, I can only carry myself and son now and everyone else has to get their own life jacket on.  Kind of goes against my nature but it needs to be done.

49

Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: The Lake House

« Last post by Twoapenny on November 19, 2024, 05:52:44 AM »

Water sounds like a step in the right direction!  So many things we don't realise the importance of until it's not easy to get them.  Baby steps in the right direction xx

50

Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: The Lake House

« Last post by lighter on November 18, 2024, 03:35:49 PM »

I don't miss noise when working in nature.

I DO miss it while indoors.  If I'm moved to put something into the air....music and nature noises/storms/green noise bring energy and/or a calm mind. 

We have potable water back, as of today!!!

Lighter