Hurricane Katrina Apathy?

[Sallying Forth]

Since Monday morning my mind has been preoccupied with the catastrophic disaster in the Gulf States which was hit by Hurricane Katrina. I've been praying for those people who are suffering, may have lost someone, have lost their homes and livelihoods, and the governments which must deal with the enormous task ahead of them.

For anyone here who knows someone or is suffering ... (((((((((((((()))))))))))))  I continue to pray. My thoughts are with you during this time.

The U.S. has never dealt with destruction of this magnitude.

From the pictures I've seen it looks like a tsunami hit the coast of Louisana and Mississippi.


I think what saddens me the most about the devastation is NO MENTION about the devastation from any list where I am a member. Everyone acts as if nothing has happened. Maybe people have their head stuck in the sand. Maybe it is apathy. I don't know.

I just wrote an email to one company online where I purchased equipment and asked why there is no support and no mention of this unpresidented disaster. They were gungho about the tsunami relief and with this there is not one word anywhere on their web site. This is a well known, large corporation.

Only one newstation in my area is carrying any extensive information about this horrific disaster. The rest of the stations didn't even interrupt the regular broadcasting today for a special announcement from the President.

To say I am shocked is an understatement.


Germany has offered their assistance IF we ask.

Excuse me, do we REALLY need to ask????????   How many zillions of times has the U.S. given assistance to other countries without their asking us to come. We've always just done it.


The beginning of my 2 cents.

[bliz]

This is a mixed bag for me.  I have lived and still own property in a very hurricane prone area, near where Andrew struck.  I saw the devastation of Andrew.  Although not having directly experienced major damage, I know just how many things, the average person does not even think about, that will have to be accomplished to repair those areas. It is a massive effort that will take years. The areas will never be the same.  That life is gone.  At least for the areas  around Andrew, they came back better than ever.

On the other hand, I am always very wary of people who get overwrought about disasters. I dont know how to explain this feeling I have. I think a lot of people, particularly codependents and Narcissists, can get very emotional about something that is happening half way around the world to somebody else.  Often, particulalry the narcissists, could care less if their own spouse or children had adequate food.  Also, in my opinion only, some codependents can use emoting about events that do not directly effect them as a way of avoiding dealing with their own feelings. I know this because I did it too.  So much easier to spring in to action for somebody else than to deal with my own issues.

I am also just cynical enough to question where all that aid money goes?  Little often makes it to those that are actually hurting.  Sometimes what they need is able bodies and most of us cant leave work and go help. 

[Brigid]

Sally,
It is shocking and heartbreaking and I cannot imagine what those people are going through.  I wouldn't be too quick to write off groups or corporations as being apathetic.  They may be trying to see what the needs are and how best to help.  This situation has been unfolding over the last week and it's been difficult to get a sense of the degree of devastation.  I heard one of our local radio stations announce this afternoon that a relief effort is starting tomorrow morning to collect money and other needed items to be sent to the area.  I think many want to help, but you want to know that your donation is going to a legitimate organization.  A disaster of this magnitude is unprecedented in our country.  I agree that other countries should step up and help us as we would help them.  Hopefully, we will see that start to happen soon.

I send my prayers to all the people of that region and their families.  I also pray for their leaders and all those who will come to rebuild the area.  New Orleans is a jewel of a city with the best food I've ever had.  I look forward to being able to return some day.

Brigid

[Sallying Forth]

On the other hand, I am always very wary of people who get overwrought about disasters. I dont know how to explain this feeling I have. I think a lot of people, particularly codependents and Narcissists, can get very emotional about something that is happening half way around the world to somebody else.  Often, particulalry the narcissists, could care less if their own spouse or children had adequate food.  Also, in my opinion only, some codependents can use emoting about events that do not directly effect them as a way of avoiding dealing with their own feelings. I know this because I did it too.  So much easier to spring in to action for somebody else than to deal with my own issues.

I'm not overwrought about this. I'm not too codependent ... so maybe I AM a N?


I do have some heavy duty issues I am dealing with right now and those issues are separate from what I see and hear and don't see and hear.

This is not half way around the world from me.


This forum is about opinion and that is what I have expressed.


The corporation I mentioned had immediately shut down the advertising on their web site for the tsunami disaster but there's not even a mention of this disaster in their own country.

[bliz]

Hi Sally forth,
This is only my opinion. I wasnt talking about you or anybody else in particular.  I do think there is a propensity, at least among the codependent, to want to concentrate more on external issues than internal issues.  It is easier and often less painful.  If someone is always running around helping others and getting their juice from that, it doesnt leave much time to concentrate on their own issues.  Personally I have observed myself doing this in the past and friends of mine, who believe they have codependent tendancies. Of course the Narcisisist would not give it that much reflection.  They would do good to make themselves look good.  Charity begins at home.

Having said all that, do not fear or waste your time fretting. THe USA always, always, come through in a crisis.  People will be donating money from all over the country.  Various aid organizations are allready there from military units to utility restoration people, doctors, nurses, etc. 

These type of disaster bring up emotions in most of us.  Better to feel those emotions and let them pass than get stuck in the worry or fretting mode. My advice only.  I am not a licensed therapist nor do I play one on TV.

[Stormchild]

Sallying, I am with you all the way on this one.

I was house-sitting for someone who was on a cruise in the South China Sea on the day the tsunami hit... this person, who is a healthcare professional, was totally indifferent to the disaster and thought it was silly of me to have been concerned for their welfare. A number of other healthcare workers vacationing in the area ended their holidays right then and stayed to volunteer. Not this one, though.

There was a lot of news coverage of tourists playing in the surf -- days later -- as bodies were still being recovered from it. Merely walking past this person now makes my skin crawl. Not that they were out there playing in the corpse-laden waves, but that their attitude certainly didn't rule it out as an option.

I don't think it's only the codependent and spotlight seeking who have strong responses to disasters. The severely abused and traumatized have such responses too. After what we have been through, isn't it reasonable that we might identify with people who are trapped and powerless and possibly in peril of their lives? It's a deep identification, but I suspect it's there.

Some of these folks start organizations like MADD or establish refuges for battered women, and some volunteer for Doctors Without Borders, or the Red Cross, and some just donate to the most trustworthy rescue operation they can find, and watch the news, and pray.

Matthew 25:34 Then will the King say to them on his right hand, Come, ye  blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from  the foundation of the world:
25:35 For I was hungry, and ye gave me food: I was thirsty, and  ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in:
25:36 Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I  was in prison, and ye came to me.
25:37 Then will the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when saw  we thee hungry, and fed [thee]? or thirsty, and gave [thee] drink?
25:38 When saw we thee a stranger, and took [thee] in? or naked, and clothed [thee]?
25:39 Or when saw we thee sick, or in prison, and came to thee?
25:40 And the king will answer and say to them, Verily I say to you, Inasmuch as ye have done [it] to one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done [it] to me.

[miss piggy]

Hi SF,

It's weird that you mention this today--I was just taking inventory of my own response.  And just yesterday I was wondering why the police were so focussed on the looting instead of on rescue efforts.  But that being said, I have to say I haven't really had free access to my TV because of back to school activities etc.  But today I was just thinking how awful this all is and why is there not more of an outcry or outreach.  Our school would have done something already for the tsunami victims--but maybe because we have just started back up we are a little flatfooted. 

It really hit when a reporter local to the area said New Orleans as we knew it is gone.

MP

[Plucky]

Hello Sallying,
I agree that the lack of response and uproar has been baffling.  You could not open an email or go to a store without being asked to contribute to the tsunami disaster.  I am not saying that was a bad thing, on the contrary.  However, at the exact same time, the tragedy in Sudan was at its peak to that date and the casualties were enormous.  Very little general uproar was heard and the finds raised were a drop in the bucket, even though significant charities sich as the Red Cross and Medecins sans frontieres were askign people to give to other causes as well .  Now, when the disaster victims are once again poor and predominantly minority. the issue is not receiving the same attention.

It makes me sick.
Plucky  

[daylily]

I think that in the U.S. we tend to rely too much on the structures that are in place.  "The Red Cross will take care of it," we say, or "Doesn't FEMA take care of that sort of thing?"

Whether it's $20 or or $2000, the Red Cross will need every cent we can spare to provide immediate and long-term relief to the victims.  I went to a meeting today at which several churches--none of them wealthy--were represented, and all of the pastors were talking about what they're going to do to mobilize their congregations' impulse to help.  (The meeting was on an entirely different subject, but of course this is not far from anyone's mind.)

I am saddened but not surprised by the looting.  I don't think there's anything wrong with taking food, water, diapers, underwear--any of the basic supplies for which people are becoming increasingly desperate.  Beyond that, law and order must be restored.  It's a short distance from unchecked looting to gangs of armed bullies roaming the streets and declaring their own martial law.  The situation must be brought under control before it escalates.

People are both better and worse than I generally want to believe.  Maybe that says more about me than it does about people.  Anyway, I think that apathy begins at home.  We are only touched by what we allow to touch us.  I have some strange ideas about that.  I give money and cigarettes to a lot of panhandlers, and when I don't, I try to remember to look them in the eye and say, "I'm sorry, but I can't today."  It's almost a dare I have with mysellf:  I refuse to learn not to look at these people as individuals.  I'm not sure there isn't something weird about that, but it's what I believe, and I try to live by it.  The same goes with this disaster.  I refuse not to be touched enough to do something, even if it's only to write a check. 

Does it really matter whether there's a jar in the grocery store or somebody organizing a telethon?  Maybe there will be, maybe there won't.  The media and celebrities are fickle that way.  But I did learn tonight that Larry King will do a three-hour show on Saturday evening on how individuals can help.  What matters is that each of us does what s/he thinks is right, whether Larry King urges us to or not.

My thoughts and prayers are with the victims and their loved ones.  I have never been so grateful for clean clothes and air conditioning.

Best to all,
daylily

 

[Brigid]

I guess I am not seeing this lack of interest that you describe.  Every network is talking about it constantly.  There are trucks full of supplies being sent from everywhere.  The main problem they have with supplies is no place to store them in the area.  The Astrodome in Houston is taking 25,000 victims into their facility by bus.  They have set up food, water, bedding, hot showers, child care, computers, telephones and whatever else people may need to at least be somewhat comfortable in the short term.  Telethons are being organized; I'm sure every major city like my own is putting together relief efforts--what more do you think should be done by those of us too far away to physically help?  The National Guard is being deployed, they have hospital ships heading to the area and other military vessels, but they will need several days to get there.  Right now their main concern is to rescue those who are trapped and that requires special equipment.  The military has provided whatever they can in that area.  The looting is a problem, but it always is in this kind of situation.  They also had to release prisoners from the local jail in New Orleans and they are now running free and wreaking havoc I'm sure.

There are certain groups that are in place and organized to help with disaster relief, i.e. The Red Cross, but anything else requires groups coming together to make something happen and that does take a little time to mobilize.  I certainly am seeing that happening everywhere I look.

Brigid

[Sallying Forth]

Sallying, I am with you all the way on this one.

I don't think it's only the codependent and spotlight seeking who have strong responses to disasters. The severely abused and traumatized have such responses too. After what we have been through, isn't it reasonable that we might identify with people who are trapped and powerless and possibly in peril of their lives? It's a deep identification, but I suspect it's there.

Some of these folks start organizations like MADD or establish refuges for battered women, and some volunteer for Doctors Without Borders, or the Red Cross, and some just donate to the most trustworthy rescue operation they can find, and watch the news, and pray.

Matthew 25:34 Then will the King say to them on his right hand, Come, ye  blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from  the foundation of the world:
25:35 For I was hungry, and ye gave me food: I was thirsty, and  ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in:
25:36 Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I  was in prison, and ye came to me.
25:37 Then will the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when saw  we thee hungry, and fed [thee]? or thirsty, and gave [thee] drink?
25:38 When saw we thee a stranger, and took [thee] in? or naked, and clothed [thee]?
25:39 Or when saw we thee sick, or in prison, and came to thee?
25:40 And the king will answer and say to them, Verily I say to you, Inasmuch as ye have done [it] to one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done [it] to me.

You nailed my feelings right on the head. That's exactly what I'm experiencing - identification. I've even lived in similar situations - no running water and no power.

Since I have no money to give - very limited budget, I recently had to decide between fuel for my car or groceries - I am praying. And where I see descrepancies in peoples' behavior I am mentioning it - the corporation showing sign of apathy to disaster in their own backyard.

[Sallying Forth]

Hi SF,

It's weird that you mention this today--I was just taking inventory of my own response.  And just yesterday I was wondering why the police were so focussed on the looting instead of on rescue efforts.  But that being said, I have to say I haven't really had free access to my TV because of back to school activities etc.  But today I was just thinking how awful this all is and why is there not more of an outcry or outreach.  Our school would have done something already for the tsunami victims--but maybe because we have just started back up we are a little flatfooted. 

It really hit when a reporter local to the area said New Orleans as we knew it is gone.

MP

Actually the police have NOT been focussing on the looting. They are totally undermanned and cannot even fend for themselves. They have no infrastructure for communicating, getting fuel for their vehicles, arresting looters, etc. There's no place to put the looters if they were arrested. There was an interview with a couple officers in the field and they are in fear of what could happen if the National Guard doesn't arrive soon. It could get worse. The police are trying to maintain some semblance of calm and that is all.

A therapist who deals with disasters said the people looting are living with so much angst and anxiety about their present and future lives that they are resorting to these behaviors to quell their feelings. Kind of like developing an addiction or compulsion to deal with feelings.

I wonder what I would do in their situation. No food, no water, no home - lost and seemingly forgotten. I might resort to stealing what I need to survive. Like I said I can identify because I lived through impoverished times.

One in particular was during Christmas about 10 years ago. Our family had almost no food, no running water (water was frozen in pipes), poor sanitation and terrible living conditions. Someone from a church organization surprised us with a huge care basket, enough food for a month. I wasn't expecting it and was so grateful to get it.


Yep, New Orleans is gone along with several other small cities along the Mississippi coast. The amount of destruction is unfathomable not to mention the deaths which they thought would NOT happen. Many stayed in their Mississippi homes along the beach thinking that if they survived Camilie they could survive this one. It was the wall of water that they didn't anticipate.

I just keep praying ...

[plucky as guest]

I refuse to learn not to look at these people as individuals.  I'm not sure there isn't something weird about that, but it's what I believe, and I try to live by it.  The same goes with this disaster.  I refuse not to be touched enough to do something, even if it's only to write a check.  

It's strange when we think that ignoring suffering should be the norm.  That denying the humanity and the equal value of another human being is wierd.  It is sad.  
For the record, when my N mom sees a homeless person, she tells a story about a panhandler who was faking it, and actually wealthy and driving a Cadillac.  When I mention that I do not believe that most of the desperate people living out of a shopping cart are faking their misery, or driving Cadillacs, her response is that they ought to go out and find a job.  She had a career in a 'helping' profession.  Her attitude makes me sick and I am sure not to mimic her in any way.
Checks are needed, just like work and prayers, so if your contribution is to write a check, that is wonderful.  If you are praying, that is wonderful.  If you are donating your precious time, that is wonderful. It's all good.  

[vunil]

I'm with Brigid on this one-- I think it's been all over the news.   It just happened-- the relief efforts will be enacted exactly in proportion to the tragedy-- the Red Cross is great at that.  I think that there has been tons of press on it, and everyone I know has talked about it

I don't think it is a disaster on par with the tsunami-- the tsunami killed 56000 (fity six thousand!) people.  But it is a disaster and the press definitely is taking notice, as are people.  I have gotten e-mail from several organizations already (Mercy Corps, John Kerry's list, and People for the American Way-- guess my politics!) asking for money and outlining relief efforts.   

Actually, when a couple of people were on the news saying this was "the same as the tsunami" I was a little taken aback. It is orders of magniture less disasterous than the tsunami (the death toll is likely to be around 100, not 56,000).  And I don't think it's the worst disaster we've had on our soil-- even the worst natural disaster.  But I'm not apathetic, promise

Oh, I was also interested in the idea of N's getting wrapped up in disaster. My experience has been the opposite. I noticed after Sept. 11 a lot of very N people on both sides of the political fence dismissed the human suffering altogether and pronounced that the disaster "showed" that "[insert whatever political or religious thing they thought previously] was true."  It was appalling, to me at least.  As if the disaster existed to prove some point, magically the point they wanted to make.  I have heard other very N people make big pronouncements about who died and who did not, as if there was rhyme or reason to it and those who died deserved to.  Grrrrr. 

[Stormchild]

Where I work, even though many of the folks in my task group expect to be sent to help in NOLA one way or another, sooner or later, no bo dy is tal king a bout it. They're talking about the gear they need.

I can just about understand that... it's going to be harrowing, and the ones with any sensitivity are going to have some nightmares after. There will be positives too, they are going to do a lot of good. But focusing on practical details keeps the mind from going down some unpleasant paths... and it'll be too late to wish they'd brought DEET when they are up to their waists in swamp crud and skeeters.

At least they are going. I can't; so I'm praying and giving $... and I'll end up juggling their responsibiities while they're on rotation. So it all evens out.