I’m not much of a collector, but thrift store shopping is high on my list of relaxing activities. When I feel low or just need a break from the day to day and the real work has been done that's where I go. I just cruise around looking at stuff. It's where I buy the majority of the books I read for entertainment. Usually when I purchase something aside from the books, it it will be for one of three reasons. 1) I have a need for it. 2) I know someone else who needs it or I think someone might enjoy it just because or 3) I take it to the nearest consignment store fifteen miles away for resale.
Well, about two years ago I came across a very nice youth equine riding hat. It had all the features you'd look for in a quality riding hat. So I bought it and consigned it. I consigned it along with one other item which sold quickly and for which I was paid on time. But the riding hat seemed to vanish into thin air. I called about it a number of times and stopped at the consignment store a time or two to inquire about its status. There always seemed to be a legitimate reason why no information was available. Each time though, I was promised a phone call, or payment for it since it was no longer in the store and time was moving right along.
In my earlier inquiries, the holdup seemed to be that the owner was not there for one reason or another. Once she was on an extended vacation abroad. So the other day I made an impromptu stop among several planned errands to inquire again. The owner was there. Bingo! Just the person I needed to talk to. She was occupied on the phone for five minutes or so, but when she got free, and after cordial hellos, I said, "Jolena, I stopped in to see if there is any news on the riding hat I consigned a couple of years ago." I'd consigned a number of things over the past few years and had studied her personality. She is a bully. I don't think she knows it, but I know it. She usually has a sidekick employee with whom the roll of good guy, bad guy gets switched off depending on the situation. She had one sidekick several years ago who was a pro in the bad guy role, but she moved away. Anyway, this day I caught her off guard with no time to construct her good guy/bad guy scheme. That was a good thing for me. I don't know how well I'd have responded to being ganged up on. I certainly didn't feel like being triangulated. I think I might have gotten very angry and lost my cool completely, giving away my power. Right away she said, I don't know what happened to the riding hat. My best guess is that it was stolen. I paused for a moment and said, "well, that should have been told me long ago. I've inquired a number of times in person and by phone and this is new news to me. I don't think I'm responsible for this outcome." She said, Oh yes, your contract states that you leave items here at your own risk and you ARE responsible I just rested calmly in a long, strong, silent pause, never changing my expression, losing eye contact or my stance. I wanted the long silent moment to be my only body language. She quickly added that her contract had been prepared by an attorney, suggesting without saying so, that it was air tight even in this situation and that I was wasting her time. When I ended the silent pause, I said, "Well, it seems clear to me that you have avoided me concerning this issue for the best part of two years, that all the vague promises of proper followup have been blatantly ignored and never materialized, and that right now you are stonewalling me." Then to sweeten the pot, I explained to her that I had a working knowledge of how consignment establishments are run for I'd once been part owner in one. Immediately she said, your check will be written Thursday, (two days later) when my bookeeper comes in. She cyptically added, and Oh yes, I'll mail the check so you won't have to come into the store! I received the check right on time. I think my chances of ever consigning with her are shot, but why would I want to do business with her anyway?
My not backing away from this issue was not about the money. It was about finally having enough courage to go nose to nose and toes to toes with a bully and not shrivel or snivel in the process. Sweet!
True, there are much worse cases of bulllying, but a woman has to start practicing somewhere on how to deal with bullies. I just wanted to share this with y'all.
tt
