Captain's Log - 2024

[sKePTiKal]

Yeah, I'm kinda late getting this started. My excuses are multitude!  <wink>

I've been doing the rip van winkle thing again... literally sleeping a lot and not spending a lot of time thinking about much of anything. Reading trash novels, watching tv... Hol is going through some intense emotial whiplash stuff lately which has required a good bit of my participation in listening to her. It's not all about S either. But she did announce the other day, she's done sifting through all her old stuff with an agonizingly fine tooth comb.

Her solar system went on the fritz a few weeks ago. After finding and bringing in a tech that specializes in her equipment, getting the generator guy out TWICE... with no success getting the genny to power up her batteries... solar guy said have the propane company come out & check pressure in the lines & regulator. One regulator was replaced today & genny fired right up. She heats with wood so that wasn't a problem and during the days she got enough solar charge, that if she turned everything off at night - she had power in the morning to make coffee & get a shower. She is now a LOT more educated in system now! So much for avoiding power outages off-grid... LOL.

But that issue got her pretty unsettled and freaked out. I'm hearing a lot about her trying to down-regulate her emotional state lately. And like it or not, some of this may be hormonal dysregulation due to menopause.

B is still "on hold" with the docs, this time waiting on a referral to a urologist to prove he doesn't have prostate issues, before surgeon attempts to relocate stimulator leads. (Fingers crossed this possible! It's much less invasive than having this one removed and the normal spinal one implanted - IF that's even possible with a specialist surgeon and all his back issues.) He got set up for pump refills with home infusion - and his nurse is a real trip! Way too perky & chatty... but a real nice girl. Local even. She was out yesterday to program the pump bolus - a controller that will let him boost his normal dose up to 3 times a day, a specified amount. It was enough to last about 3-4 hours and then it just goes away. He's clearly feeling better today - and maybe some of that is being able to control the pain relief himself. At this point, the stimulator is turned off and will stay off due to the side effects - so I've been trying to find anything I can to help give him even 10 minutes of relief. Heating pad, capsaisin, and so far what's helping the most is a nerve tonic tincture. I've got a list of herbs to acquire for teas & tinctures and Hol had a lot of skullcap to share. I've got some growing too.

I don't know if he's staying until after his April appts or not. He hasn't said anything one way or the other.

I've been mudding drywall in the studio and sponging and putting the next layer on, etc. Purging a lot of the craft stuff I've stored for 20-30 years. Hol's friend Jess took some home for her little girl. I really have the urge to clear a LOT of stuff out right now, and need to when we start work on the ceiling so there's less to work around. I know we're building woodsheds this spring/summer and the driveway needs many trucks of gravel. But other than planting that's all I know of for new projects. Maybe a delivery drop box at the gate for UPS/FedEx... since they notified us of delays due to "impassible driveway". Funny - we got in/out just fine.  <shrug>

I'm getting a first-hand education in the psych impacts of chronic pain. How it affects mood, drains away resilience and objectivity... so many aspects I can observe. But I almost never see him just give up. He has his normal household jobs and no matter what, he does those. When he's got the extra relief - he keeps going on the rest of the vehicles and projects. We've burned a lot of wood this winter. Didn't NEED to, but it is cozy and the heat helps with the relief.

Business stuff is going well and new Prez is beginning to think of what ELSE we could make with our machinery - while the retired Prez (who is the machining/computer design whiz) is working 3 days a week on updating some of our capabilities. He's always done custom, one-off designs for certain customers. New bookkeeper got a big raise & bonus the end of the year - she is doing a bang up job with the software and finding all kinds of ways to cut expenses too. We're going to have to start planning to replace equipment soon.

Kitties are well & keeping us highly entertained. B has bought himself a tool, with which to make "fun money" sharpening knives & scissors. It's also a good distraction from pain to focus like that. And he doesn't want to be completely dependent on me. The usual guy mentality.

So, it's been a quiet time around here and just not a lot to say. He and I are still learning the finer points about each other and when he feels better, I feel better too. It's difficult not being able to help much... and I miss the B that isn't completely focused on bearing up under the pain. It's been a long slog through "the system" with him - 6-7 years at least. But he's been doing this over 30 years. The plan is, once the stimulator is resolved - then we can find out what's going on with his Navy retirement pay. Get his move finished up, etc.

I take breaks from him, sometimes just to shift out of the space where everything hurts & depressingly takes so long to get "fixed". But we don't get on each other's nerves on a day to day basis or argue that much. Then, it's usually he doesn't need to do something all by himself - when Hol is bored to tears and needs something to do and wants to learn from him. Their work styles are total opposites. She charges in and gets at it; he knows he has to pace himself and thinks about things first almost as much as I do.

So this spring should go a little easier than the past couple years. It's been a lot of fun driving Rudi again! Almost 20 years old and still only 25K miles on him. He got new shorter shoes before the snow hit, too. Makes it easier for both of us getting in/out.

[lighter]

That's a  BIG update, Amber.  Lots going on for you guys.

First, I want to say I'm impressed, as always, with how well you guys cope with B's ongoing pain.  I have a high tolerance,but ongoing pain is a whole'nuther ballgame for me.  I went a day without pain meds after 2nd C section.... that empty needle wiggling around in my spine was the worst part.  A man of action, with that level of patience and restraint, is astonishing, IMO.


Second........ I'm glad you continue making time to decompress and remain/get back to level. That's a good thing. For you, Hol. B....kitties, the farm and doggies. 

I had goosebumps when I read Hol's desire to stop sifting through her old issues and self regulate more efficiently.  She's noticing what's going on in her internal world.... sounds like.... and she wants to feel better.  Is she seeing a Therapist?  I hope she will if she's open to it and sorry to read she's having so much trouble at her hut.  Those kinds of mechanical things overwhelm me too.  Right now there's no power in the front room at the island cottage.... and it's not in the electric panels. It's beyond me and feels like a HUGE unsolvable problem bc I don't know who I can call to resolve it.  I do notice it's screwed up whether I fret or find my joy.  Sounds like Hol's figuring that out too.

It's wonderful to read business is going well.  I look forward to hearing what else you guys end up making with your equipment!

About your driveway being "impassable"..... I imagine delivery drivers sometimes end up stuck or take more time turning around bc they fear getting stuck and just can't or won't take the time/chance with all the driveways they have to drive in a day.   I brought my Christmas tree up a mountain, to feed goats, yesterday and their drive was breaking off at the edges and muddy enough to challenge my Yukon..... it's been wet here.  It made me nervous and what the heck is up with ZERO street signs in the mountains?  Not to mention.... there's only room for 1 car to pass?  What the heck to people do in the snow, when they can't see where the road drops off?!?! 

The mail box at the end of the drive sounds good to me, in other words. 

I hope your tonics and herbs continue helping B and maybe Hol, if you have something for her hormone shifts.  This too shall pass.

Can't wait to hear about your garden and, of course, progress with health issues.

Lighter

[sKePTiKal]

For some time now, most of my "journal" posts have been about things & people in the external world. The projects, drama, observations... but that doesn't mean there hasn't been activity internally. That activity has simply been slow, quiet and very very gradual, with only glimpses of difference or change disconnected from the possibility of a narrative description.

So, lately, there's been a shift from "other focus" - back into some personal things that perhaps have lingered in a less affective dormant form while I made external changes. Dramatically illustrated by my dream-life, in fact. Intense, strange, symbolic stuff that - to conscious mind - comes out of the blue. But emotionally, they seem important in ways I don't see right now. Could just be the chile relleno I had for lunch, too....   shrug...  but it sure doesn't feel that way.

First one, was situated in some kind of monastic or convent type estate. I was being pursued by something that I perceived was malevolent; harmful to me. Not a specific creature or being; more of a force of nature. I was wearing some midnight blue gown; no weapons; no outerwear to protect from the chilly wet night. I took a turn, at speed, running right into the arms of some tall but strong, maternal figure who wrapped me in a deep crimson cloak. Said to not be afraid that she/they would hide and protect me.  /end scene

Well, that woke me up! No one currently in my life of that stature or gravitas. But I did get the sense of my old tai chi teacher. And nothing currently "threatening me" in my awake-life either. So I shook it off and went back to sleep.

Next dream continued the theme - the setting this time, was the home of an old, old acquaintaince from the 70s. Strong, solitary, maternal; retired professional figure skater - and she had performed some chunks of her own tai chi routine for us in real life. There were many people in her home; a communal situation; and I was trying to find some square feet upon which to claim "my space" and find a role within the greater, constantly changing crowd of people. In this dream, lots of people challenging my existence in that space at all - so struggle and conflict. And TEA. LOL.

Yeah, that one woke me up too. I hadn't thought of her in decades and I'm sure she passed on long ago. But again, there was the sense of being accepted into the protection of a secret group of "wise women". From some personal threat I am consciously unaware of. GO FIGURE.

Again, last night with the dreams... this time the old farmhouse we rented while I went to college. It still stands, Hol & I drove past it. The kitchen was original 1700s cabin (which I loved) and I was in my bedroom above it. Looking around at how the house had changed since 1990. More rooms added - someone living in my old studio room; a warren of tunnels, secret hallways & doors... all kinds of art & music students using the house as a home base. Yet my bedroom was spartan. Mattress on the floor and familiar views out all 3 windows; same trees. Both (adult) Holly & Amy came up the kitchen stairs and started trying to get me to leave that space - where I was content, safe, welcome and comfortable. Then we explored the house.... and couldn't find our way out. I've had this dream about that house at least a dozen times before. The people mostly unknown to me; strangers. So I don't think there is anything being messaged about me, to me... rather it's something about the house itself.  <wide eyes>  Wondering... pondering...

I've had similar dreams over the past couple years about the beach house - I usually see it in the dream empty. No furniture people or activity. The pool is covered always in that dream. The poolhouse - the space of so many memories - is dark & quiet. In real life, it was bright, full of tacky geegaws, & full of music and people.

Yeah, I know the Jungian symbolism of the "house" in dreams. No, I don't think there is anything left over, unprocessed, from all the previous work I've done. This feels "new". I have noticed about myself, the past couple years, that I was keeping my attention firmly planted in the external world - other-oriented and dealing with physical expressions of me. Like redesigning the studio. I haven't felt interested; no pull from - the shadow work or the void & veil. That seemed like it was closed for the time being. A "gone fishin'" sign on the door so long, I wondered if I just imagined it all. Astrology stuff was "another language" that I couldn't understand. I unsubscribed my last tarot reader because nothing she was reading was relatable to me.

Now, it seems to be opening up again in the "old reliable" form of dreams. I learned awhile back, that asking "why" and trying to analyze this kind of thing was a total waste of time. I'm better off "winging it" and accepting the happy accidents that occur along the way. And they ARE there. It's not like I move from being in one world or the other; rather when that side is active I'm partly in both. At the same time.

We think we have a local fisher cat which has been reducing the flock of ducks & geese; mostly just kills them - doesn't eat them. Ducks are all gone; I counted only 10 geese yesterday. Hol surmises that when all the birds are gone, S will be too. (I'm not so sure...)

B is happily adapting to having his bolus active - to boost pain relief temporarily - and trying to learn the best time to use it. He's been getting 4-5 hrs of sheer relief, followed by a distinct crash back into the chronic pain for a couple hours - followed by an echo of the relief for another long stretch of time. We've got the referral now for the urologist - and are completely on our own selecting one. I dunno what he's going to test for, since the stimulator has been off the symptoms haven't reoccurred. As I documented. But of course, we can't be believed; there just has to be something else going on with him. The tech for the device looked absolutely devastated suggesting he just leave it off until we go thru the silly process of more tests to prove it's not prostate issues or something else causing the symptoms, that it is just like said - the electrical signal from the leads directly to those S1 & S2 nerves. S I G H.

I am spending part of the morning & afternoon picking out one of 30 different shades of white to combine with the paint colors I picked out for the studio. Ceiling will be white. LOL. 30! I've got one more window to sponge and then I get the second coat of mud on. Already have primer for the drywall. Got exterior paint for the doors to match siding & trim... waiting on deck sealer... and waiting on weather. Meanwhile there are all kinds of "relocation of stuff" tasks to complete to prepare for the next phase of updating.

OH! and last weekend the new prez recommended we upgrade some equipment at the shop. It's a good investment I believe and is one step closer to making sure the kids receive a competitive company when we turn shares over. Bro & I quickly came to a decision to proceed. A big change from where we started working together. In fact, he was more on top of things than I was! That was a shocker. But a welcome one.

[Hopalong]

What a rich and absorbing update in your last two posts, Amber!

I'm glad there's forward motion on B's pain. But I couldn't refrain from a tiny bit of dream pondering -- so I asked myself, in what way is Amber feeling "invaded"? My heart pinged at you missing the B he was before the pain got so intractable. And how deeply and tightly you are wrapped up by the nonstop necessity of staying tuned into him. There's vulnerability in those dream stories, perhaps a need for respite and refuge.

Has anything changed in what you need, so you don't get swamped by it all?

All in all, though, sounds to me as though diving within, heading for the treasures of subconscious territory, is a natural reaction to so much focus on Others. B, Hol and S. Unavoidable so much of the time.

For me, it's slowly become clear that despite my whining and wishing otherwise, being alone most of the time is a source of strength. Very bizarre to discover my introverted side the last several years. For writing, for resting, for calming dem nerves.

Here's to all of us protecting ourselves from Too Much. I've revisited those feelings lately with D's I presume temporary reappearance, and remember how Too Much felt all those years.

hugs
Hops

[lighter]

Hi, Amber:

Another detailed update.... very interesting read and a break in the day. I'm struggling to put pinch pleats back into a very wide drapery panel..... SO THICK AND DIFFICULT!

About the dream with you in a blue dress, exposed to the cold wet.... and then a protective presense shows up with a red cape to embrace and keep you safe.  My first thought was.... you're both people.... and maybe you're unconscious belief system is shifting into conscious belief regarding your ability to protect and keep yourself safe?  I'm curious what you're thinking about the dream as time passes.

The farm house dream, where you're feeling safe and comfy in your old room.... then your adult children come in and insist you move out of the cozy space and you can't get out of the house at all.  First thought.... Hol's been criticizing your choices for years and you've been paiently resisting and finding your own way..... but the energetic bond is there and her words maybe get in, at points.  If one buys into negative voices, even a tiny bit, they have power in our lives, IME   Do her words block your serenity and prevent you from resting comfortably.... keep you feeling at the edge, unable to fully embrace the head space and full belief in what you need and entitlement to simply choose it without question..... can you shake the feelings of obligation, if that's what the dream was about?

It's possible you feel tethered by your DD's beliefs in ways impacting your ability to fully choose yourself and your needs.... even if you aren't aware?  Maybe? Not sure. Just my two cents.

About B's struggle with pain and the slow moving medical complex...... I feel weakness and despair in the left side of my back and chest when imagining the minutes and hours without the pump turned on.   I'm going to pray the urology appt quickly clarifies whatever the medical complex needs in order to move forward. 

On the bright side... it seems the tech is competent and interested in moving forward with haste.  I hope you guys navigate the next set of chalenges quickly to get B's device online consistently. 

Question......
and this isn't a nice thing to write.....
what if the birds go away in the next week or so?

What if the fisher cat has help taking the bird flock to zero,. just to see what S does?

Not saying the birds have to actually die....  Just saying it might lead to the clarity Hol seems to think it will.

Lighter

[sKePTiKal]

Well, B has a large live trap that he's going to show Hol how to setup & use, today. As for "what S does", she and I disagree over her "strategy" (I say, it's her decision and she's been overly patient already; make the decision SHE wants). She has decided to see if in the next month, IF he can positively participate in a) the tasks necessary around here and b) relationship with her - instead of being so self-absorbed he can't even follow her dog training protocols with Kiri. After 5 years of the same behavior, I can predict the outcome with about 70% accuracy.

Case in point: yesterday B, Hol & I dove on a specific task - cleaning out a small shed and redistributing items to where they'll be needed/used. As she said WHY she was helping and that she was coming up... he said he was getting ready to take a bath or he'd come help too.   <rolleyes out my ass>  We were done in an hour, then Hol & B moved a lot of lumber we saved from deck rebuild to barn until we're ready to put up woodsheds. I went up to studio to work on drywall.

B is going to reorganize the studio garage for his purposes, and we need to take the drop ceiling down, to see the plumbing situation for the upstairs remodel. So, this way, the bird food can be stored in the shed in mouse-resistant bins - and there won't be any meeses running around his delicate precision instruments in the garage. Or my fabric upstairs.

As for the dreams, I'm waiting to see what else is delivered. Nothing last night. They certainly seem useful and don't portend anything negative. Could just be a "long time no see" kind of thing.

[sKePTiKal]

I'm hearing the various groundhogs didn't see their shadow today. Time to get muscles loosened up, and some strength training... coz spring she be a'comin' early!  (They hope.)

[lighter]

Hol can't see S in her life is a choice.....for whatever reason, she can't.  Not yet.

[sKePTiKal]

Woke up to Christmas this morning, Hops! 5 inches of wet snow turned this place into a winter wonderland; a currier & ives print. It's not going to last long then, the battle of the "muddy girls" (jeeps) begins. Altho, I'm planning to finish up as much as I can getting my tax docs to the CPA, some housework & making dark chocolate & cherry brownies for Valentine's Day goodies.

B's been here since Thanksgiving. We've had a fire in the stove every night. The bolus (morphine pump booster) has been helping him a lot. He boosts it once in the morning and right before bed (only allowed 1 every 8 hrs) so he's been moving easier through the work days and sleeping better at night. We still have the usual crap with the doctors, but it's been easier to get him to shift focus to stuff we're doing around here. He does things, especially in the kitchen, differently than I do. But it's been pretty easy to adapt to that or just insist on the little things I want "my way". We are getting more "fun things" in our routine too... just little mundane things that are local, that please us. He saw a promo for an estate jewelry show in town that we went to. Prices were a tad high for things, really. I did see a pair of heavy lapis earrings that interested me; big oval drops - that would probably hurt to wear, especially at that price. What decided me against, was the wire fastened in the front. (Maybe 20s style?)  While we were there, he snuck around and bought me an affordable bracelet instead.  <swoon; it's those kinds of things out of the blue that keeps me enchanted with him>

Yeah, he's a packrat; he's messy (but does clean up after himself); and somedays just hard-headed stubborn negative jackass. But he's MY jackass. None of that ever lasts a whole day either. I irritate him too, interrupting his process with things I think need to happen RIGHT NOW. LOLOL. And I know Hol is a little jealous. We can spend the whole weekend at home just hanging out together, doing our own things and talking most of the day... and no drama occurs. She does say that we're still in the "new relationship" phase... but he's been moving in since 2019 (I know, right??? 6 years?? REALLY???) and we're spending more and more time together, contently. WHATEVER.

Given his last 2 marriages, I can see him wanting to drag his feet. And he knows I have residual fears from going through losing Mike (despite me still cussin' M's packrat gene; NO I still haven't used up a lot of the stuff he bought in bulk). But we do talk - about almost everything - easily. There have been a couple things he didn't want to bring up but did just spit out... and we're past those things. So everything's just fine between us.

Hol's been getting more girlfriend time, and I think that's having a relief-effect for her. Last one, was a spur of the moment sleepover - which meant we had to take care of the dogs, since S was working. I told her she deserved a night off & to enjoy herself - which she did.

I'm really antsy to get started on spring stuff: seeds mostly - but our nights are still way too cool, even with grow lights. I might chance some herbs in the next week or so and use a space heater. We'll see. Having someone to plan with is a lot more fun. Hol is too bossy & critical and only she does it the right way. SIGH. I can't stand that but she'll get it out of her system pretty soon, I hope.

[Hopalong]

I'm so happy he makes gestures like that, Amber. You deserve them -- a lot.
Sounds like you both are dealing with the gritty parts of the nitty very well. And happy V-day to you both!

One thing I noticed with ExH #2, who had intense chronic pain from the rods in his spine and nerve damage (nothing like B's) ... was that his sense of humor was almost all physical. Goofy dancing, etc. So when the pain surged and he had to hold himself very still to cope, that was torture. His life as a monumental sculptor before his accident involved dancing up and down massive granite pieces moved by crane and banging chisels into rock or holding heavy grinders aloft for hours, etc.

It's always amazed me how busy and physically productive B sounds, given the pain. I guess at this point in life I feel that admiration about nearly everybody I know! But y'all both take the proverbial cake. And overall, you report very little irritability and anger between you, which is awesome considering the amount of work you engage in and obstacles he carries.

Do you think B would unconsciously wait on a proposal because he loves you so much he wants your lives to be totally sorted, etc? Or fears burdening you? Six years is a long time if that's one dream you may hold in your heart.

I'm touched that you still miss Mike sometimes. You think keeping whatever it is that he buys in bulk around is about that? Is whatever it is useful to you?

hugs
Hops
PS Oh yes I'm jealous of that fat snowfall you got! Here it's been flip-flopping between spring and some unnamed uneasy season that doesn't belong. Don't envy you future mud struggles though. Is the road up graveled?

[sKePTiKal]

No, the road and driveway aren't gravelled; plenty of shale down - but eventually that powders down. Planning to add gravel this spring. More snow expected tomorrow overnight.

Mike bought useful things - like vacumn sealer bag rolls. Many things I haven't kept but I EVENTUALLY use up stuff. Most of the non-useful stuff did NOT make the move - LOL.

Not waiting on a proposal; we agreed early on it would be a legal mess for us to marry. He did agree that we could have a norse ceremony, if I chose - when all the medical is done. I'm content being his shield maiden.

Moving and especially being busy with his hands takes his mind off the pain. It's still there but because he has a task, the attention shift acts like insulation - to a greater/lesser degree. It's important for him to keep the parts that are working - working & strong; it's how he compensates for the lack of spine mobility. Remember, he's been in the military since he was 17; until just a few years ago. "Rub a little dirt on it" and "suck it up buttercup" sum up the mentality that's permanently conditioned into him. The docs told him in '94 he wouldn't walk again because he only has sensation partway down his thighs. He put in the work and I can't keep up with him some days. Especially in the woods!

Of course, he's prone to despressive cycles and there is PTSD about doctors - given his mistreatment. Little by little, he's been receptive to my ideas that "the past doesn't predict the future"... and there is a chance - if you let it - to be different "this time". Just that little bit of reframing helps him break out of the "I'm doomed" cycle.

[Hopalong]

Hmmm, what's Amber been doing?

Carrying around an adorable duck who thinks she's Mama. I'm jealous.

Chasing B through the woods.

Explaining to Knuckles that being named after a knucklehead is a compliment.

Baking stuff. Getting excited about studio.

Worrying about but also getting calmer in regard to Hol and S.

Enjoying the sunshine and the snow when it comes.

Sleeping well?

hugs
Hops

[sKePTiKal]

Just livin' life Hops. We have a big list upcoming in the spring, so lots of discussion/planning.

The geese continue to get picked off, one by one. B's noticed the remaining ones have been actively shunning one - either an agressive drake or ? There are too many drakes, Hol sez. S was going to cull some, but hasn't to date. Oh, and S is talking trading in the room he rents in the city for a basement apartment, with yard so he can take his dog with him. It's no big deal to Hol.

She's been ordering parts for the '77 Pontiac Catalina that she & Knuckles drove across the country. She & B are conspiring to transform it into the ultimate hot rod muscle car sleeper... LOL. Woodsheds are still on both our lists; Hol wants to fence a bit of her place to move the birds down there & have a good place to contain Kiri outside. Dog WILL run and refuses to learn boundaries. But she hasn't harassed the neighbor for a few weeks, since S hasn't been home as much.  <rolleyes>  Dog is easier to train than he is. But they ARE getting along better when he's here, than previously.

Hol & I both got bit by the interior design fairy and have been letting ourselves get swept completely away. She's sending me links for vintage french bars & worktables & fanciful wing chairs... and still trying to dial in her hut's storage & functional space too. So, we've been having fun letting the imagination run completely wild with ideas; sharing links back & forth to our "finds" while we toil away on the drywall situation. I'm finally ready to prime around the windows; she just started mudding/taping the cracks in the ceiling. B is going to install a ceiling fan out there for us and we have screen doors to rehang. When the temp warms up, I have pressure washing of the new siding & deck to do... paint exteriors of doors... and seal the deck.

There's furniture to donate/sell... clutter to either dispose or hide... and then we'll be ready to take down old kitchen cabinets (and fill those holes)... demo a vanity that's been located outside our bathroom out there... same for shower in bathroom... and choose some really pretty glam accoutrements for the new "powder room". My plan is to buy/build basically a "tiny house kitchen" to provide the basics for drinks & snacks while working or hanging out with the ladies. B gets a presence in there as well... his framed collectible motorcycle posters go up on the art "feature wall", too.

There's a plan; but there is deliberately NO DEADLINE. We have pluimbing work to complete downstairs for services upstairs first...and other things will always have priority. I've ordered replacement cushions for front porch furniture, and B & I keep discussing how to screen it in and block the wind in the winter out here. Or maybe we'll do that out back, with a summer kitchen/sun room combo...

B is doing OK. Some days better than others. The medical side of things is moving G L A C I A L L Y, so we're making a list of all the things OTC, easy things he can do that helps relieve the pain. Focus on what we CAN do, not what we can't or can't speed up. Plenty of other stuff to keep his hands & mind busy in the meantime. We're definitely supporting our local businesses - two places now, we go for lunch "treats". There's another new cafe that'll be openin soon in town too. The couple have been vloging building their house (in the next county) and reno'ing the cafe on YTube.

Knuckles is just being the bestest dawg... he's calmed down a little, and Hol's training technique works great with him. He listens to voice commands now. She's got a bigger job with Kiri, who's still a "puppy" - even though she is the biggest of the 3 dogs - bigger than the chocolate lab! But she has more of the Irish Setter build than Pyrenees and the Pyrenees stubbornness.

So we're all just toodling along. Feb has been a lot of "clean up" of little things we've been too busy with more important stuff to take care of. There is a big spring cleaning weekend in my near future, I think... and lots of planting of aloe & lavender that I've overwintered inside.

[sKePTiKal]

Quickie update:

Still plugging away on studio interior. It's AMAZING how much better the ceiling looks with the seams taped & mudded. I think Hol & I agreed on paint colors; just two now so walls & ceiling are merely backdrop. A light peachy pink, white ceiling & trim.

She found me the most amazing vintage French workbench/storage unit. But it's 11 ft long and over $4K with shipping from France another $5K. But I'm not spending that kind of moolah. On the other hand, she has a friend (cabinet maker) that can build it custom out of birch plywood and put a nice wood top on 2- 5 ft long units. I'll paint the base black.

Found the ideal sewing table - on sale even. Shipping is gonna be a bit tricky, but it does come flat packed so it will be safe until we're done painting. The old desk I used before is already out of the room.

It's been rainy and we can't do much outside yet, can ya tell?  <big grin>

B is still here but if he gets time between all the med appts he might go get another load. He's gonna start the ceiling fan install (in studio) today.

So, just same old same old... but progress!

[Hopalong]

The studio sounds FANTASTIC!
Love the color, the perfect workbench, everything.

That's exciting. I'm imagining how much joy and purpose it'll bring you.

Even more than carrying a friendly duck.

hugs
Hops