To me this is kinda funny: About ten years ago I was 42 and basically had a nervous breakdown. I worked with my Nmom and hated her. If you were around back then you will know that all I did was complain about my nm and working with her. It was awful.
My oldest daughter was 16 back then and said things to me like, "Mom, stop it, Gram is great. Why are you always complaining about her? Stop playing the victim. blah blah blah"
Now we go to lunch and the whole time my 26 and 22 year old daughters are going on and on about how stingy my mother is. How even though she is rich, she buys all presents off the sale rack. She gave my son-in-law pajamas that she had bought several years ago and just ran across them (his birthday was in the last couple weeks.) She didn't acknowledge his birthday on his birthday but later.
My mom gives my kids a lot. Down payments for houses. Tuition for college. She spends a lot on them. But she never gives it with a cheerful heart. She never gives unless you ask. So when it is time to give a gift on, let's say, your birthday or Christmas, you get some cheesy pajamas or something old she had around the house.
At Christmas we drew names. Everyone bought their person two or three well thought out gifts. My nm got her person a gift card that she had gotten as a gift from someone else.
NOW my kids get it. They do the complaining. I told them today. Remember when you used to reprimand me when I complained about your gram? They told me she was always nice to them as children but the minute they became adults she started treating them like shit!
