That was interesting, I definitely created a (fictional) perfect family for myself in my younger days but my mum never did, she talked endlessly about the abuse she experienced when she was growing up but didn't seem to notice she was doing exactly the same to us.
The idol worship thing rang a bell with me, particularly in view of friendships. I've realised very recently that I have a lot of friends who I think I am much more attached to than they are to me, I think I've built the friendship up into something much more than it is. I've definitely become friendly with people because I like their lifestyle or because they are powerful within a group and I wanted that to rub off on me. This week has been very telling, I've had tests that a lot of people have known about (having been ill for months now) and only two people have called to see how I am or offer to help. There's been a deafening silence from many others! I have realised it's time to move on and move forward. I feel okay about it, I can see how I've tried to create relationships to replace the family ones and I've not quite managed it, but I'm trying to be more honest and truer to myself and just spend time with people I like without worrying about whether they're the right kind of people or not. Sounds silly when I write it down like that. Also realised that there are some friends I'm nervous about being honest with or in front of, so the fifth point he made about control was interesting as well.
Thanks for posting, Hopsie
