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Relationship/s

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Hopalong:
This man still teaches me.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=efHo3nyBZns

hugs
Hops

Hopalong:
Feeling really good about something.
The nice man I met online with whom I've had two very pleasant dates...I just ended it very kindly while expressing sincere gratitude (over email).

The elementary thing was, we really don't have much in common. So despite his niceness, which is real, I managed to think ahead and just see, clear as day, how frustrating it would be to try to forge something (just out of mutual loneliness).

He responded SO nicely that it confirmed my sense of him, and also said he actually agrees with me. He even added "political differences" as a likely bridge too far. (I didn't remember discussing that but he probably noted my license plate. LOL!) And he left me with compliments ("beautiful" and "highly intelligent") which will keep my old ego purring for weeks. I said genuine and kind things about him too.

What felt good was trusting my intuition (wasn't looking forward to our next outing) and also realizing -- this is the right thing, for us both! Respecting both our time and energy enough to spare us a futile effort to fit.

This ole dog figgered out how to do a new trick. So then I went and wrote friendly messages to three new geezers. All in all, a good experience! Very good. Glad I met him, glad I felt good about saying farewell. And neither of us hurt or diminished.

hugs
Hops

lighter:
Really good trick to learn, Hops.  I'm so glad to hear you're trusting and honoring your intuition. 

Hopalong:
I was way too smug and self-congratulatory in my post about it. Gross. It was just a big relief.  I'd like to feel proud of myself without wallowing in self-praise, though.

Meanwhile, had a friendly chat with a nice guy who lives 4 hours away. I'm allergic to cats and he wouldn't "abandon" his for a relationship (I'd never dream of asking anyone to!). I told him if my cat allergy didn't defeat us the distance would and he agreed, but said it's "a shame." Kind of nice to enjoy a little chat without a goal, so I invited him to get in touch for a coffee if he comes through this way. That was it but it felt nice. Low key.

Very little traffic on the website now that I'm nearly 72 (older men are happy with and feel privileged to pursue younger women, I just would like to meet someone within a 5-year range either way). But meanwhile, there's nothing to stop me joining the very fancy new Senior Center and taking a few classes there and meeting some folks. I should and pretty soon, I will. Just been lazy about it.

Love's not much on my mind, as much as loneliness. Spring and summer aren't bad though. Fall/Winter are when I go into alone-forever-grief-fear mode. Not now.

hugs
Hops

sKePTiKal:
Hmmmph.

Hops, you're setting the bar awfully high for yourself aren't you? I mean, how can you pat yourself on the back for a "job well done", if you DON'T congratulate yourself and maybe feel a bit proud or smug that you've achieved a new level of dealing with things? That's all part of the experience, isn't it? Enjoy the glow for a bit!!

But, if you're still bragging about this moment - as the "high point" of your relationship management style - in 6 years (or 6 months) THEN you may whack yourself with the 2x4 of self-criticism.

BTW, even in this situation the rule of thumb that it takes two to tango, still applies. It mighta gone very differently with another sort of "gennulman".

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