No, my children aren't showing any signs of being molested.
...
Anyway, it was b/c of his reaction and becasue of what I read about N's being sexual abusers that I began to think about this topic.
In my gut, I don't think he would do this his children.
I was wondering how prevalent it was.
This rings some bells with me. A good friend of mine is divorcing her N husband. In the process he is making a lot of noise about her family, and making accusations that her brother is a child molester - although he uses the word 'paedophile', and stating that the children are at risk from their uncle. In fact the children rarely see the uncle and are never left alone with him. It was their mother who was molested by him, as a child, when he too was still a child. Not right, but to me, not quite a paedophile.
In this case, what is happening is a deflection tactic, to pass the spotlight to someone else for the bad bits of the story, and away from himself. The N doesn't really worry about the children, only about himself, but if he can make a lot of smoke and noise about a topic that he knows will push people's buttons, then he will.
In this case, the husband is already in trouble with child protection himself about failing to protect his children when they are with him. Both have suffered 'accidents' in recent months, and in neither case did he take them to hospital, although both invoved fractures. He simply waited until it was time to take them back to their mother, and then sneered at her for being over concerned. Then when child protection got involved he accused them and her of professional collusion - she works within the health sector. This is a very nasty man indeed.
So, my advice would be, check anything that you intuitively feel needs to be checked, and ignore smokescreen behaviour. Good luck.
C
