My mother's assisted living called on Friday morning to say that she had been taken to the hospital. She fell and they called 911 and eas being taken to the local ER.
It was 8 a.m. - my husband was playing golf, we both took the day off to be together, do yardwork, were expecting a delivery of gravel, etc.. We don't get to see each other that much due to our work schedules.
Now this!! She has interferred with our lives for over 20 years, me, my whole life.
I told him to keep on playing golf and that I was not going to cancel the delivery. I called the hospital and found out that she had no broken bones but they were going to keep her overnight. Now it's Sunday and I have not gone to see her yet. They are releasing her today and we have to pick her up - and face her. I never get a break and have to pick up all the pieces - her pieces. The worst part is all I get back is nothing, absolutely nothing, other than blame.
My stomach is in knots - all the past feelling of rejection, Nrage, belittlement are flooding back.
My husband, who is very supportive tells me to go and do and don't let her get to me.
Am trying my best but, I keep falling back into the old me.
Please give me some words of encouragment? I hate myself when I get like this.