Nmother in the hosptial

[Lizzie-tish]

My mother's assisted living called on Friday morning to say that she had been taken to the hospital. She fell and they called 911 and eas being taken to the local ER.
It was 8 a.m. - my husband was playing golf, we both took the day off to be together, do yardwork, were expecting a delivery of gravel, etc.. We don't get to see each other that much due to our work schedules.

Now this!! She has interferred with our lives for over 20 years, me, my whole life.
I told him to keep on playing golf and that I was not going to cancel the delivery. I called the hospital and found out that she had no broken bones but they were going to keep her overnight. Now it's Sunday and I have not gone to see her yet. They are releasing her today and we have to pick her up - and face her. I never get a break and have to pick up all the pieces - her pieces. The worst part is all I get back is nothing, absolutely nothing, other than blame.

My stomach is in knots - all the past feelling of rejection, Nrage, belittlement are flooding back.
My husband, who is very supportive tells me to go and do and don't let her get to me.
Am trying my best but, I keep falling back into the old me.

Please give me some words of encouragment? I hate myself when I get like this.

[Anonymous]

My mother's assisted living called on Friday morning to say that she had been taken to the hospital. She fell and they called 911 and eas being taken to the local ER.
It was 8 a.m. - my husband was playing golf, we both took the day off to be together, do yardwork, were expecting a delivery of gravel, etc.. We don't get to see each other that much due to our work schedules.

Now this!! She has interferred with our lives for over 20 years, me, my whole life.
I told him to keep on playing golf and that I was not going to cancel the delivery. I called the hospital and found out that she had no broken bones but they were going to keep her overnight. Now it's Sunday and I have not gone to see her yet. They are releasing her today and we have to pick her up - and face her. I never get a break and have to pick up all the pieces - her pieces. The worst part is all I get back is nothing, absolutely nothing, other than blame.

My stomach is in knots - all the past feelling of rejection, Nrage, belittlement are flooding back.
My husband, who is very supportive tells me to go and do and don't let her get to me.
Am trying my best but, I keep falling back into the old me.

Please give me some words of encouragment? I hate myself when I get like this.

Reverse the hate pronto and send it in the direction it deserves, your abysmal excuse for a mother.

Do something really physical to get rid of the feelings or kick the cat (only joking).....

[bunny]

How did it go?

bunny

[write]

to live with the resentment of having parents who don't parent us- then become super-demanding in our lives.

I emigrated and don't answer the phone to get away from mine.

Just don't feel guilty whatever she says or does; and think to yourself- she doesn't deserve a wonderful daughter like you.

xoxox

[zeene]

I refuse to have anything to do with my mother because she is an N.  My sister who lives in the same city as N has the responsibility of looking after her....driving her here there etc.. I would refuse to do it.  My sister chooses to do things for her...but has not been abused to the extent that I have been.  She was always the favourite and still is.  It doesn't hurt anymore..because I am enjoying my freedom.   It's too long in the coming.

I guess I am free from all of that stuff.  I feel good about not having to do anything for an N.  I see the extent of what she has done to hurt me.  I don't owe her anything....FAR FROM IT!

Even if I lived in the same town...I would do nothing to help her.  I stay away. She is my abuser.