Hiya Daylily:
So sorry things are so tough right now. Ya know....I say....go with your gut.
My gut tells me, "Give it some time."
This sounds reasonable. She will settle in.
People, in general, don't usually like change. The older we get......the less we like it, so it's said. But the great thing is....most of us adapt after a little while, even in our golden years.
My guess is that your mom will get used to her new home and accept it, after awhile. Not many people want to give up their independance or be "put away". Given how ill she's been....her mental capacity is likely not in tip top shape....so it may take a little while for her to get used to the idea that she isn't going home. It's a tough reality for anyone to swallow eh? Give it some time.
I'm with S&G.......give yourself a break too, please. It won't be good for anyone if you burn out or get sick. Please look after you and cut down the visits, get more rest, eat healthy and maybe even let go of some of the responsibility here. You are not in charge of everything. It isn't your fault the way things have gone. You can't fix it all. And it's not up to you to break yourself trying.
(I think it's very noble and loyal and loving of you to try....but truly....it seems like you will only end up hurting yourself if you keep up this super-woman pace!!).
You are a super-woman you know!!! Just one that needs some tender loving care to recoup from this haul so far. Please take a hot bubble bath, think of something that makes you happy.....a good memory....a future dream......and fall asleep tonight knowing that you deserve a good rest. Tomorrow....the world will go on and your mother will soon adapt to that idea.
((((((((((((((((((((Daylilly))))))))))))))))))))))))
Sela