ANONIMITY

[write]

For the past few days I have been corresponding amicably with a lovely member, but suddenly I was brought up short- my new life, no attachments for a couple of years, can I be me and reveal me. NOOOO!

It's brought out so many of my demons I was hardly functional today, not helped at all when one of my former lovers appeared as if by magic when I was dressed as a Christmas Tree ( almost ) getting ready for a concert and proceeded to tell me he is now engaged and buying a house with the woman he fell for two days after we fell into each other's arms ( sorry )

I am pleased for him ( honestly- though if I had to spend too much time with either my projectile vomitting might prove a problem ) but WHY???? why do people who have decided you're not the(ir) one have to intrude on your complacency and give an emotional blow by blow account of their future bliss?

Maybe it's things like this write the plays on BBC america Mystery Monday?

Maybe I'll be really happy in months to come when it's my disemboweled or headless corpses are de riguer...( that's not mortis, by the way...)

[genuine]

write I understand where you are coming from. Do whatever feels comfortable for you. Sounds like your former lover was projecting his own jealousy onto you. Maybe he can't handle the fact that you have moved on with your life. What did he expect? for you to become a recluse geez. I'm guessing he is not happy as he proclaimed to be. He'll dig his own grave. Karma always prevails. Love genuine

[Chicken]

Yeah, I agree...
I am suspicious of these people who are loud and have to proclaim to the world they are happy...  (Tom Cruise and couch comes to mind) ...there is something fishy about it, who are they trying to convince?  themselves? 
Write, your ex was out of order.  You just don't do that.

[Hopalong]

Hear, hear.
Or don't hear.
He had no business twisting the knife like that and I am very sorry.

I had a similar moment with my exNh when he started writing me about how he was wooing his next wife, and because I felt sorry for him I didn't discourage him...but when he started telling me about making love to her I woke up. Told him this is not appropriate and I don't want any more details.

That was years ago, long since healed...but your story reminded me.

Glad he's gone from your life, Write.
And only outstanding people dress up as Christmas trees.

Hopalong

[write]

it did make me feel strange, and yup, you're probably right about the happiness thing, something he said struck me as odd: 'I'm buying a house' not 'we're'

I'll have to practice cutting people off though, I'm too bloody nice for my own good sometimes...and so many people have NO TACT!!!

I guess it's a dilemma too where I'm at right now- half of me wants to get out there and find someone new, half of me wants to stay hidden away from relationships and pain-free.

I have to keep reminding myself the rest of my life is pretty good and moving on.
It's just romantic relationships I have given up on. Temporarily.

Yuk Hopalong- glad you told your ex to keep his sick-making er love-making to himself!

Thanks guys, you always say the right things!