X is my mother, and she is who I would consider a gender rebel. As a child she lived like every other girl born into the baby boom generation, and was blessed with being financially fit, which was not the case for everyone at this time. Her parents however were not the best. She had to deal with my grandmother and grandfather constantly fighting, and they were often drunk. Despite that environment, she became a strong independent woman and learned to protect and maintain herself as best as she could. Often times she found herself getting into fights and arguments because that was an everyday thing for teens growing up in NYC. She still however managed to stay of trouble and keep herself out of harm’s way. As her life continued to progress she met a X who would turn out to be my father. My father turned out to be nothing what she had expected. My mom was often abused, and my father abused things such as drugs and alcohol. My mother fought back. She reported him to the police, and had an investigation start in the X to see where the cause of his problems was stemming from. My mother was now a single parent, having to work and take care of two children by herself. She was providing for two kids on her own, and sacrificed her life to do so.
For the past ten years she has stayed at home because she wanted to raise her family the way she felt it should have been.
Today, my mother is playing the role of a *mother*. She no longer is rebelling against what society says a woman should be doing however she still wears the pants in our house. To me, she deserves the respect of every man and woman, because she stepped outside of the box and did what she needed to do. She did not settle. She didn’t allow herself to get trapped in an abusive relationship, which often times is the case with many woman. She became both mother and father, and provided for the family both financially and emotionally. She may not be doing it anymore, but I think the years that she had put to the prior to the present time are enough.
Anyone who says a woman belongs at home is entirely wrong. My mother could do any job of a man just as good as a man, and she believes that. She has never let anything stop her and that is why she has succeeded in raising there well-rounded kids. I think she put the good head on my shoulders, and until my college experience I have not realized how important of lessons she has taught me along the way. Lessons that I could have only learned from her because of the experiences she has had in her life. If you were to ask my mom if she viewed herself as a gender rebel, I do not think she would say yes. She simply would state that she just needed to do what was necessary to survive and take care of her kids. That is my definition of a gender rebel. She went beyond the lines to get things done, and I am forever thankful that she did that.
Her defying the normal gender roles is what allowed me to learn so much from her, and it created such love and affection that I can trust her with anything.
She is my mother, and she is who I would consider a gender rebel. These days she is a stay at home mother, but there was a time when she defined the term independent woman, and she ignored all the people who said she was violating the role of a woman.
This was written by my 19 year old son for a college writing class and given to me. I am the mother.
He is right. Maybe I do not see myself as a gender rebel but I guess I am. I could never explain how this has touched me. From him to me and from me to you. We here are all gender rebels.
Deb
