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which way up?

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Argusina:
My T helped me "put words" on my depression and feel the feelings instead of stuffing them. She said that depression was actually "forbidden and unfelt emotions". An emotion doesn't really last that long, unless you supress them...

This approach helped me immensely, and every time I feel depressive (see helpless) I try to feel the UNDERLYING emotion. Am I angry, sad, scared? It's safe and okay to express those feelings, as long as you make sure the environment is safe... so I guess for the depression to go away it would be better to remove oneself from people/places that are "unsafe"...

My currentl LOVELY boyfriend makes me feel safe and accepted. All sides of me. It is incredible to be able to cry in his arms and just feel love and compassion streaming back!!  :cry:  :lol:

The best of luck, there is a life beyond N...

CC:
Dear write,

I am not on medication myself but was close to it about 6 months ago.  But my therapist told me this:  A good medication will "lift the fog", and help you function on a more focused level... but it should not CHANGE your feelings, you should still be able to feel your feelings and work on what needs to be worked on.  She said it should provide CLARITY, not fuzziness.  

I don't suggest going off the medication if you feel it is helping you.. and if your depression or anxiety was serious enough to mandate it in the first place. as long as it is not "dulling" your senses.  But you can always ask your psych to adjust the dose, or change to something else if you feel it is not being effective.  My sense is though, that since you are here doing some work, you have not lost your sense of balance... and you are just still figuring the future out.  If you were numbing yourself with medication, my feeling is you would probably not be still doing this.. you would be content with just letting it do its thing and you would not actively be trying to heal in other ways.  Just my opinion.

Avery:
I agree with CC.  I have been taking some form of anti-depressant for almost 10 years now.  The first 8 years I was on a drug called Paxil (an SSRI).  After the first couple of years, I started to feel "flat", no emotions really either way.  I didn't know that it was the medication making me feel that way and I didn't know that I could change meds and feel much better!  (I guess because I was getting the prescription refilled all along by my GP.  I'm not sure why no one made sure that I went to a Pdoc to get them.)  I also had TERRIBLE withdrawals from the Paxil, but that's another story.  Now that I am on meds that are right for me, I feel great!  

Bottom line, when I was on the Paxil, I don't think that I would've really delved into trying to figure things out...I wouldn't have the energy to even think about it, nor would I care to.  You're asking the right questions, Write!  

Avery

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