Hey kelly,
I saw Mommie Dearest first when I was a child. That movie really haunted me throughout my life. I didn't know my own mother was an Nmom as yet, but I knew there were some odd similarities between my mom and Joan Crawford. Mostly that whole dynamic that she was such a sugary, over-the-top actress with the outside world and was a miserable, grumpy, yelling, over-reactor at home. I, like Christina had the Christmas where we received all these gifts, which were then taken and given away to needy children. The scene with the clothes hanger terrorized my dreams for some odd reason. In my re-curring dream, I could feel my mother beating me with the wire hanger as I fell into the small closet. I saw the movie for the second time several months ago and I was just as disturbed, however watching the movie this time really empowered me. I watched it during a time that I was worried about the end of my mother's life and being the executor of her Estate, (like your mom, Kelly, my mom was at one time EXTREMELY financially successful). Seeing the way Joan Crawford left her daughter with nothing, especially after she spoke so highly of her at the Academy Awards Ceremony, I was convinced that if I didn't let go of this drama with my mother and try to move on with my life, then I was going to be sick with regret and bitterness. It was also then, that I decided that the book I was saving to write and publish after my mother's death, will be the very one that I write and publish today. Of course, I plan to mask her identity and build the story in such a way, that it only "coincidentally" mirrors my hellish childhood, but I think it would be both cathartic and relieving to put my story out there and free myself from that imaginary chain that swore me to secrecy so many times. I no longer wish to allow the terrors of my past to fester inside me until I erode from within. Shoot, if it's any good, maybe the book proceeds will replace my lost inheritence. Kelly, maybe you, too?
Later kelly
Tiffany