Bumper Stickers

[Stormchild]

Saw a cartoon, a few years back, of a fly driving a VW with a sign that said 'maggot on board' ... kind of thought that was the essence and quiddity.

[Certain Hope]

<))))))'>_{,, ,,}

 

[teartracks]

Storm,

Saw a cartoon, a few years back, of a fly driving a VW with a sign that said 'maggot on board' ... kind of thought that was the essence and quiddity.         

I was thinking  it was  that false humility thing  until I looked up quiddity!

teartracks

[gratitude28]

EEEWWWW on the maggot...

My parents' favorite bumber stickers are those that pick on others of course... They love this one that says something like Nuke All The Unborn Gay Whales or something. You know, that way they can look down at a large group all at once. And they also like one that says about hoping to die peacefully not like the people screaming in their grandfather's car (something to do with how he is old and doesn't know how to drive). That one is a favorite because they loved to rag on my grandfather in front of us. It was lovely too when he died and all they could talk about was when they were going to get the damned money from his estate.

Lovely people. Sorry to bitch and make this unfunny.
Love, Beth

[Stormchild]

Oh... that's a Stephen Wright joke... I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather did, not screaming and crying like the other people in his car...

edit out: I had a couple ideas for bumper stickers about narcissists, but on second thought, nah. they may not be nice people, but I'd rather joke about things that are genuinely funny.

[gratitude28]

Wow, I need one that says (if the day ever comes)

"My eight-year-old did what I asked the first time I said it!!!!"

Or ... "My kids got downstairs in under 45 minutes and all they needed do was brush their teeth and get dressed."

The Steven Wright one IS funny, but not when it's used in a mean way...

Love, Beth

[Portia]

so you knew I'd bite didn't you?

Nope! There are many fish surfing here! Thanks TT.

I reeled a fishy in, it told me stuff I didn’t know, so I thanked it and slipped it back into the water. “Any time” it said. What a knowledgeable and kind fish I thought. Then my tummy rumbled and I remembered I haven’t had my dinner.

IXOYE it is a Greek acronym for Jesus Christ

I didn’t know that. In the words of South Park Stanley “I learned something new today!”. 

Beth: Sorry to bitch and make this unfunny.
Balance is good! Laughing at funerals is a special gift! Being serious about being playful is important!  ((((((((Beth))))))))

[gratitude28]

Actually, it is the Greek word (name) Jesus pronounced eehoce (approximately). The Greek and Russian letters are similar and I took a tiny bit of Greek once upon a time. Someone correct me if I read it wrong...
Love, Beth

[penelope]

ha!  some of these are really good.

The funniest bumper stickers I ever encountered (didn't know whether to laugh or cry) were when I worked as an intern at a mine in college.

I was sort of naive to "country folk" (grew up in a college town).

The workers drove pickups with things like (note that one of my elder coworkers used to come in every morning and put his beer in the fridge for his ~10min drive home):

GREEN PIECE! That nose ring you are wearing came from a mine

or That lump of metal you're sitting on came from a mine
And that one that says something like:  We'll mine other planets later.

Kind of funny (I was horrified when they asked me "you're not one of dem treehuggers, er ya?" - picture a 50ish year old "lady," no teeth, who's never been to college, asking me this... as I wasn't quite sure how to answer as I thought to myself: I think so....)

[pennyplant]

Went to see "The Science of Sleep" tonight and saw a bumper sticker that said:

When Jesus said, Love your enemies
I'm pretty sure he really meant, Don't kill them

PP