In Defense of Denial

[Stormchild]

What the Amish are Teaching America
by Sally Kohn

On October 2, Charles Carl Roberts entered a one-room schoolhouse in the Amish community of Nickel Mines, Pennsylvania. He lined up eleven young girls from the class and shot them each at point blank range. The gruesome depths of this crime are hard for any community to grasp, but certainly for the Amish — who live such a secluded and peaceful life, removed even from the everyday depictions of violence on TV. When the Amish were suddenly pierced by violence, how did they respond?

The evening of the shooting, Amish neighbors from the Nickel Mines community gathered to process their grief with each other and mental health counselors. As of that evening, three little girls were dead. Eight were hospitalized in critical condition. (One more girl has died since.) According to reports by counselors who attended the grief session, the Amish family members grappled with a number of questions: Do we send our kids to school tomorrow? What if they want to sleep in our beds tonight, is that okay? But one question they asked might surprise us outsiders. What, they wondered, can we do to help the family of the shooter? Plans were already underway for a horse-and-buggy caravan to visit Charles Carl Roberts’ family with offers of food and condolences. The Amish, it seems, don’t automatically translate their grieving into revenge. Rather, they believe in redemption. ...

from here: http://www.commondreams.org/views06/1006-33.htm

[Interestingly enough, they don't seem to be in denial about any part of it, either.]

[Stormchild]

Hops, I have a serious question for you. It could be discomfiting, so I'm going to PM you if that's OK. Let me know? Because it's really nobody's business but yours. And... if you are interested, you can tell me when, too, because I don't want to lean on you when you are overloaded. Fair enough?

[Stormchild]

Jac, I liked that Wheelis quote about the anger of the doer who will not let [her] work be swept aside. Liked it so much that I've printed it out in sepia Apple Chancery font, and will be posting it on my wall at work.

thank you!

[Hopalong]

Hi Storm.
Please feel free to ask me whatever you like, on the board is fine.
I know your intent is good!

Hops

[Stormchild]

Thanks Hops

My intent is definitely good, but I don't know what the impact will be. So I'll send you a PM, with the proviso that we will talk about it on the board if you're comfortable with that once you've seen the question. I'll try to get this to you within the next 24 hours - it may take a draft or two before I get the right clarity and compassion.

[Hopalong]

Hi Storm,

I squinted my way through your PM and honestly, please forgive me, but I don't want to read it right now...I saw enough to get your drift and I do not want to go there.

I'm needing to maintain a smooth calm course right now.

Thanks,
Hops

[Stormchild]

Understand completely, Hops. Delete it if it bugs you. I'll delete these posts, too, if you like.

[Plucky]

Hi Hoppy and everyone,
I don't think that refraining from being constantly outraged is to be in denial.  There are many wonderful things about the world which deserve to be seen and appreciated.  If we stay in a state of struggle against the bad, we remove our ability to value the good and visualise the world we want to live in.  And what we see/hear and think are what we become.  The good, the gentle, the beautiful, will vanish from the world if there is no one to nurture it with attention.

I think the idea of being my brother's keeper is this.  Anyone on earth could be my brother.  In theory, everyone on earth is.  But with my limited capabilities, my sphere is not the whole world.  I may want to be informed about the whole world, but I cannot expect to impact the entire planet by any of my actions or inactions.  I learnt a song in Sunday School which I sing to myself whenever I feel overwhelmed by not doing enough to 'fix' the world.  "Brighten the corner where you are" went the song, and in these cases, I try to define my corner and cut down my expectations of my own duties to a size I can manage and then do something. My brothers are then the people I have contact with or can have contact with, or an impact on. 

a sentence structure impaired
Plucky

[moonlight52]

PLUCKY     PLUCKY   DEAR PLUCKY ,

WOWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE  ZOWIE YES AMEN  WOWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE ZOWIE

Your post here is exactly how I feel .You have written your beautiful thoughts with such kind loveliness.

WOW AND WOW   

(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((PLUCKY))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

LOVE TO YOU,
MoonLight

[Plucky]

Thank you Moon,
I was thinking about you when I thought about valuing beauty.  I think of you as one of the board artists - someone bringing beauty and an alternative way of thinking to the board.  I can't remember which side of the brain is which, but you seem to be using the opposite side from me.  If the board were physical, I would picture you as angel food cake or blue sparkles or a nice frankincense fragrance.
Plucky

[Hopalong]

No worries, (((((Stormy))))).  thanks for understanding, and I do appreciate the effort. xxoo

Thanks, Plucky. That's sensible and compassionate and I agree with you! I'm just sort of vocalizing whatever's wandering through my brain. Anderson Cooper's Congo/Darfur documentary has had a big impact on me. So...I wrote my minister with a program that helps congregations mobilize to do something right now for Darfur and said I'd like to help.

That's doing something in my corner that could join with all those others who want the genocide stopped now. I am grateful to Cooper for shocking me into action. It is the worst genocide in human history, and we've (the Western world's) just let it roll...

And ditto, Plucky, I see Moon as a creative dancing amazing sprite at the heart of the board!

((((((((((Plucky, Moon)))))))))

[Plucky]

Hi Hops,
I agree with you about Sudan.  I used to wonder how people stood by and let things happen, as in Nazi Germany, but now I realise that we are standing by right now.  I think history is not going to be kind to us.
Plucky

[moonlight52]

Maybe there is so much understanding of ourselves and the  world that is hidden from us on this side of the veil.
We are connected to our higher selves and an ever upward spiral of learning evolving sometimes sideways thats OK.
Thoughts are things and very important like what tt said once about what we say is so important these things shape our futures .

(((((((((((((((((Hops and Plucky))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

I have been seeing those blue sparky thingys ever since I fell off the teeter totter as a real little kid     

(like the teeter totter = bipolar) tee hee I crack myself up. 

SO MUCH LOVE AND THEN SOME MORE

MOON

[Hopalong]

(((((((((((Plucky, Jac)))))))))))))

I BELIEVE THAT WE ALL CAN DO SOMETHING ACTIVE TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE IN DARFUR. We can:

Go to www.savedarfur.org
Make a contribution if we have $10 to spare
Write letters to government and UN leaders; sign online petitions
Participate in rallies or civil demonstrations of support for intervention

I agree it's important to live our own good lives and that mostly these form the boundaries of our effectiveness in making a difference in the world. But I don't think it's pointless to take actual action to change something in the world, rather than wait for the judgement of history.

Last night on Africa's Misery, the World's Shame, a Marine photographer who was haunted by a dying 1-year-old girl who'd been shot in the back simply for being the tribe that she was... said, it's never too late. As long as there are people in Sudan and Congo who are still being killed, it's never too late for us to make a difference. I believe him.

We have learned about our own voices, in our FOOs and our relationships or ex-relationships with Ns. Let's raise them, in whatever way we choose but perhaps a foot beyond our comfort zones, for her.

Hops

[moonlight52]

Thanks Hops , 

It is good to have this website and know there is something that a person can do to help.

I believe in understanding the suffering of the world which I do .

I see no reason to contribute to the fear.

hugs ,
m