Be Supportive and Understanding or Say Nothing!

[CC]

I have not been coming here as often as I used to  - but I am shocked and revolted at how the anger and antagonism here has been mounting and the tone of this board, overall has changed just in the last month or so.

This once used to be a very safe place, people that visited here were kind, supportive, and gentle - and were free to express any disagreement in the same kindly manner - we welcomed it.

I have been watching several posters here lately including a few by an anonymous 'GUEST' or two - I am appalled at the vindictiveness that is festering.  

A specific example comes to mind: what went on between Portia and Avery recently - which I thought was very maturely worked out between the two of them, as it should have been!!!  The "Guest" attacker that is finger pointing to Portia, and in another thread to JacMac - to name a couple - as being "angry and ranting and spewing" -  their comments have been mild in comparison to the hatred and antagonism depicted in "Guest"'s responses!!!   Could this be the famous N trait - PROJECTION?!!  

Angry Guest  - YOU are THE WORST KIND OF COWARD.  I have yet to see you write anything that is remotely helpful.  I doubt you are even doing any healing. At the very least, you are terribly rude and don't seem to have a sense of good taste/manners.  I feel confident I can speak for the rest of us - You and your angry comments are not welcome here.  We will not allow you to penetrate with your self hatred.  I strongly suggest some serious therapy before you entertain yourself with a healthy forum such as this.  You and everyone else would benefit from it much more.

The really unfortunate thing is that there is another "guest" that appears to be much more mature and kindly and constructive - I suspect this is our former friend who has the nosy husband.  Thus the angry responses to the "evil" guest poster are probably inadvertantly being received by the wrong guest.  

I wish the "nice" guest would identify themselves with some sort of a handle or post as Bunny does, with an identifying name at the end but no sign in.  This way we can respond and appreciate your comments in the way that is validating for you and appreciated by us.

For the rest of us (I'm feeling protective of my friends here and some newcomers) please do your best to IGNORE the nasty guest poster, any response to their mean bones will just serve to fuel the fire - as it does with any narcissist....

Just a few thoughts and love to you all -

[CC]

Just read through some more posts catching up - it sounds like many of you are already taking care of this negativity.   I am certain now of who the "nice guest" is.  

Its too bad we have to work so hard at this but I guess it is a good dose of real life here on our forum.   Hopefully this coward will be bored here after too much longer if we give him/her no responses.

[Anonymous]

I am a nice guest! but I can see posts from several other nice guests too.

I stopped posting with a 'handle' when I didn't appreciate some of the unfair generalisations being made about my situation- which I didn't want to get into further.

This is a very civilised board in general though, lots to learn here.

Personality disorder is a very complex topic, to be sure.

[rosencrantz]

Your usual strong and dignified self, CC.  

Good to hear your contribution.
R

[Flo]

CC and others on this thread,

I agree that most of the posts are wonderful and helpful, or else I would not be posting and reading.

I noticed a few thread ranting about Vaknin which I thought were really horrible.

Is there a Moderator who can be contacted to erase such diatribes?  I'm on other boards where this is routinely done and so people are protected to a fairly great extent.

Still, we are taught to ignore trolls.  Trolls, when ignored, will leave. They want attention and when they don't get any, they go away.

Flo

[Anonymous]

CC,

You keep talking about no responses, yet you've given two on the topic, and on top of that, posted a whole new heading about it!    All of that, expecially the latter, is surely giving unwanted attention to these people, which is trying to be avoided.

You said all that you wanted and then said "whoops, I didnt' read through all of the other messages where it had been worked out already".   Very convenient in allowing you to still say your piece about it all.

You might say that I am doing the same in responding here.  I don't think so.   Firstly, I do not think you are a "troll" at all, but a decent indiv. who cares about the group.   I am responding to your last messages and not any of the other stuff.

I just want to say that even those well meaning need to let it go now, and also that it is a very good idea to read a few responses down in heated threads, before replying.    It may be getting sorted out already and well meaning, you could start the whole thing up again.
[/b]

[Poetic Justice]

CC gave an opinion.

Jacmac asked a question.

Portia flew off the handle.

But guest just picks and pokes, snubs and whines; s/he whinges, complains, belittles and dodges.  

S/he looks down her nose and finds you wanting so s/he

Can have the last word.


But I'm a Guest, 2!      

So this is it,
to say what I like
and RAGE all I want

a venging angel,
seeker of truth

my higher purpose  
to prick your vanity
rattle your cage
shove your nose in it
(it's for your own good)

And to have the last, last word.


Are you my alter ego?


Peekaboo!  

Guess who!

Can't catch meeee!

Tee hee!