Voicelessness and Emotional Survival > Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board
new man
Anonymous:
I read something brilliant today called `You Know He's a Keeper, You Know He's a Loser: Happy Endings and Horror Stories from Real-Life Relationships' by Linda Lee Small and Norine Dworkin.
I read nearly the whole book in Barnes and Noble, the keeper stories were so sweet and the loser stories were so funny ( the writers said it was much easier collecting the loser stories btw )
One thing kept coming up again and again though, its not about what the partner says but what he does
I'm going to really take that to heart this time.
Anonymous:
How about some quick character tests?
1. Borrow a niece or nephew, preferably under 6, and go to a park or amusement park. Or go to a restaurant and order something messy like spaghetti or ice cream. If no kids are available, try dogsitting and check the reaction.
2. Go over to his family's house and watch how his mom and dad interact together. Or listen to how he talks about his mother/sisters...
3. Play a card game or board game that you're really good at.
4. Acid test: pick a topic of your choosing and time how long he is able to listen. No sports, business, politics.
ok he's great with the kids, his and mine. Really patient.
And he can listen.
I'll try the Monopoly next. No extended family to meet, but I thought he handled his ex-wife quite patiently when she called ranting ( I know he might have been different without me as an audience )
I'll take things really slow I think.
write
Portia:
Hello write!
As for the new beau: the acid test for me would be what do the kids think of him? (Both his and yours.) Would yours like to go to the park with him alone? Is he good fun in their eyes? Kids are better than adults sometimes for really seeing how people are! P
Anonymous:
How do you say 'Helen' with a Potteries accent
'elen!
Its strange. I wouldn't normally do the kid thing, best to get to know him myself & not involve children etc, but that evolved first, outings etc. just as friends. Maybe that's how it shoudl stay for a while.
I really don't trust my judgement yet where men are concerned!
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