Hi everyone. I'm new here. I wanted to introduce myself by telling you a bit about my story.
I've been in a destructive relationship with a woman with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (not diagnosed, but should be) for 4 years, and it's taken it's toll on me BIG time. Before I met her, I was a social, outgoing, successful, happy, "together" type of person. But I'm also the type to help out those in need...so when I met this woman, she pushed all sorts of "poor me" buttons, getting me to befriend her and then later on, pursuing me to date. After 9 months, I finally gave in.
I won't go on with the story--it's too painful even for me to re-tell it. But needless to say, she turned out to be a very self-absorbed, needy, unhealthy, toxic, abusive person. She never physically abused me--but that's about it. She is/was emotionally, verbally and mentally abusive. She is also a closeted gay woman (I'm female, too), and she claims she struggles with her sexuality--which I can accept--but being abusive and being confused by your sexuality are NOT the same thing.
Anyhow, it has taken me a LONG time to get to a place where I finally am not trying to "fix" things between us, and I've left the relationship. It's a tough road--she calls me here and there and "begs" for us to get back together, but since I've already done that in the past and it ended up being a very sorry mistake on my part, I refused her this last time.
However, a big part of me is still very angry, very hurt, very traumatized, and very confused as to why someone who claims to love me would be so hurtful towards me? I recognize she's toxic. I recognize that I developed an unhealthy attachment to her. And I recognize it's now up to me to get myself out of this scenario. But it's a struggle every day.
I look forward to meeting all of you on this board, and sharing in your stories/experiences.
Cheers.
Nine_Lives
