They treat others as dirt and themselves as GOD. They disdain any notion of other people "needing" them for anything, as much as they tend to enjoy having people be their "loyal subjects"
They criticize, belittle, put down, discredit the people closest to them, and then, when the Narcissist sees the pain in the people they've wounded, they SHOW NO MORE REGARD FOR THEM THAN FOR A HALF- SQAUSHED INSECT.
They fight off strongly any of the slightest temptations that call for heart-rending love and sorrow for what they have done.
THEY FAKE COMPASSION, AFFECTION, SYMPATHY, being IMITATORS OF HUMAN EMOTION ONLY. They see the FEELING OF EMOTIONS AS BEING A DIRECT ATTACK ON THEMSELVES.
Example: two children and an N mother...one child is doted on and the other child, when she tries to even get the N mother to notice that she exists, is told "oh QUIT BEING JEALOUS AND ACTING LIKE A BABY!"
When the victim of the narcissist dares to ask for any sort of REGARD, the narcissist goes into a NARCISSISTIC RAGE or WITHDRAWS AFFECTION (usually with some pouting and the comment of "I've done all I can for you. What MORE do you want from me?"
When the poor victim tries to report mistreatment at the hands of narcissist, it doesn't go well. The victim still can't believe it's even happening, and very few others on the outside do either, because there is GOOD "ACT" being put on by the narcissist outside of the home. You'd hear comments like "oh, sheeeeeeeeeeee would never do that to you. I don't believe it!" or "but he is such a KIND man"
(Having an abusive step father, I can relate to this first hand. I was a whistle-blower in my family of origin, and when I'd tell people how I was being beaten and abused, the comments were "oh, now don't talk like that about your own father. shame on you!" "he's such a good man!" "He is the one who takes CARE of you. how COULD you say those things!" "i think you just must be misunderstanding. If you weren't so mouthy, he wouldn't be provoked to hit you. Try just not talking back for once; it will help things a lot.")
(by the way, I still kept blowing the whistle even DURING the abuse, while living in the house with him. Finally, after years, my mother divorced him, and years after that, he was diagnosed as paranoid/schizophrenic, ocd, ocpd, borderline.)
When the victim tries to reach the narcissist through kindness or "being good" the reaction of the narcissist is one of HORRID ABUSE. The victim is subjected to one who DISDAINS HER for showing KINDNESS TOWARD NARCISSIST! Victim begins to feel trapped in an awful nightmare where she is not sure what is wrong or right, because the reactions of the narcissist are so changeable and don't line up LOGICALLY. Victim falls to her knees eventually, begging the narcissist to tell her that she DOES EXIST AND DOES NOT WISH SHE WERE DEAD!
The narcissist does NOT WISH VICTIM WAS DEAD, but cannot say that, so Narcissist pushes the victim away in CONTEMPT for her being WEAK and A CRY BABY.
Narcissists cannot bear to look at the face of one they are hurting and wounding. ( can recall X going into "retreat mode" when they saw and heard that they had hurt me). Instead of coming to you in heartfelt repentance, trying to make it right, the narcissist will withdraw from you, causing you even MORE pain.
