Proud of myself

[axa]

Hi All,

Been off line most of the week as I drove to my new city to try and find an apartment.  It was weird, wonderful and a bit scary.

I absolutely hate driving on motorways and most of all I had MERGING......... I get so panicky looking in the mirror, trying to move into another lane etc......... well I did it. I drove for 7 hours, on the motorway, on link roads, found my way around the city.  I am so proud of myself.  Stayed with a friend who was very kind, have a place to stay but it is in a very bad neighbourhood so am anxious about that.  Got my house rented to an older couple from 15th september on which is great.  Lots to do.  It will be strange living in the city having lived in the country most of my adult life.

I am so pleased and really want this thread to show others there is life after Ns.  I have achieved so much in the past 9 months.  If someone had told me a year ago that I would have made such significant changes I would not have believed them.  I just want to say that I am proud of myself and want to share it with you all.  I want to acknowledge my courage and how I have faced my fear.  Needless to say there are many things I am still anxious about but I do feel brave.

Thank you all for all of your support it has made such a difference to me.

Hugs,

axa

[JanetLG]

Axa,

You SHOULD be very proud of yourself!! You HAVE been brave!

Well done for facing up to things you know are difficult for you, and beating them anyway (particularly the motorway driving - I loathe that!)


Good luck with all the other changes you're making.

Janet

[Certain Hope]

Dear Axa,

Raising my iced-tea in a toast to you     Good going, congratulations, and three cheers!! 

It's wonderful to hear your increased confidence, and especially these glowing words:  "I am proud of myself"... so cool!! 

Many blessings to you as you continue this new life... today and always.

Hope

[Ami]

Dear Axa,
  I have to laugh b/c I HATE merging in traffic, too.
 Axa, you have done SOOOOO well. I can;t imagine being that brave.My hat goes off to you. You should be very proud of yourself, Friend                          Love    Ami

[isittoolate]

YEA  to   Axa  The  Brave

Love
Izzy

[attachment deleted by admin]

[CB123]

Axa,

I'm proud of you, too!  I know how these little things, like driving for seven hours, can seem like such a normal thing to do--but it was a huge step of courage!  Sometimes I am completely worn out after spending the day doing what, probably, most people do without thinking! 

You are such an encouragement to me, Axa!  You know the old saying that we "stand on the shoulders of giants"?  I often think that I am standing on yours--you have seemed to be just a few steps ahead of me, and it is encouraging to me to see your bravery.

Much love,
CB

[teartracks]

Hi axa,

Hugs right bachacha!  Sounds like things are falling into place one at a time.

Proud of you too!

tt

[Hopalong]

I hope you soon have a safe place, Axa.
Thoughts with you as you maneuver this new ground.

You have been just AMAZING.

lots of love,
Hops

[gratitude28]

(((((((((((((((((((((AXA))))))))))))))))))))))))

I am always so happy to see your name because you are a person who has made such huge steps that we all know it CAN BE DONE. You are an amazing and resilient woman.

Thank you so much for sharing.

Love, Beth

[Poppyseed]

Axa,

Just wanted to say thanks for sharing your humble strength.  I really struggle with facing my fears.  I face them and sometimes painfully fail and then recoil back into my shell.  Then mount courage to try again.  I never seem to stop trying.  I must be a determined one in that way.  Loved to read about the changes you see in your life after nine months.  It sounds like you have taken yourself to new heights just by daring to jump!  Leaving the country for the city....all of it!  It is inspiring.  Thank you!!

--Poppy

[lighter]

Axa:

You rock, my dear, and I thought about you Sunday.... your heroic cold shoulder day, you remember the one, was on my mind. 

Keep being brave and looking towards a wonderful future. 

((Axa))

[axa]

I was so moved by the responses to this thread.  I feel supported and cared for by all of your words.

Poppy,

I am scared and excited but I am so ready for this journey.

Beth,

Sometimes I feel so small and ill equipped to make this move but I do know that somewhere in me there is a strength of spirit......... well it got me away from XN so there is a real desire to have a healthy and useful life.

Hops,

You have so helped me on this journey.  I often think of you lying on your bed with your laptop sending me those invaluable hugs xxx

Teartracks,

So proud of you too.  Appreciate your wisdom all the way.

Sweet Cb,

These shoulders get so shaky at times but I come back here and they straighten up again, ready for the next round.  I don't know about how brave I am but I want a life and am determined to have one.  I think of how you left the farm, moved with your kids to the city and it fills me with hope.  Never underestimate the power of your own courage.

Izzy,

To witness your strength has been a privilege.

Besee

Continuing the journey of merging with the adult Axa, hope that is as successful as the motorway merging!

Ami,

Lets continue on this road together with loving support.

Hope,

And so many blessing to you.

Janet,

Thank you, at least the motorways in the UK have signs,  really helps.

Axa