Ami? Do you have something to say to me outright?

[Izzy_*now*]

1/11  Dear Izzy,
  My  healing  on the board (moaning posts, pain, blood and gore-lol )has taught me that you did the BEST you could with your D. You loved her the best way that you could and you STILL do.My M did the same.

1/11 Hello Ami

NOT 'the best I could', I loved my daughter. I see you are comparing me to your mother, and perhaps have totally misunderstood the tack that I have taken here with memories of my thoughts of fear.

I am not torturing myself. I am on a search for understanding a possibility.

1/11 Please spare the criticism(Izzy???) b/c I have a genuine mental  block. Intrusivness

 

1/13 I am only bringing my M up(Izzy????lol) b/c I am explaining the that the  brainwashing  is very strong.

Izzy

[Ami]

I think that you can be critical, Izzy--- maybe unknowingly, probably unknowingly.          Ami

[Gabben]

I think that you can be critical, Izzy--- maybe unknowingly, probably unknowingly.          Ami

Hi Izzy,

Throughtout my short time on the board I have seen you following Ami's posts with passive aggressive critical comments.

However, perhaps Izzy, you have a lot to be angry about, many hurts and injustices to you in your lifetime, nothing wrong with your anger...nothing...it is how we use it and I for one cannot preach. I have been overly critical of others and passive in many way and for long periods in my own life. I was in heavy denial of my anger issues. I still have anger and I still get my buttons pushed. You will never know how many times I want to post something to someone here on the board that is passive or hurtful because in the past they slighted me an hurt me in some way passively. However, I do my best to refrain and I process the anger out and embrace whatever healing needs to come about. Also, I have felt shame dumped on me here and it hurts too. But I am working to never retaliate and never to act in revenge or with a blind desire to hurt someone.

Hope this helps Izzy - I know that Ami is not a hurtful person. I don't think that you are either.

So I sympathize with you, if you get in touch with old hurts and anger, I'll be here to chat.

((((IZZY))))     (((AMI))))


Lise

[Izzy_*now*]

Hello Ami
All well and good. Just please leave my name out of your posts relative to your Nmother and her sarcasm.

and Gabben

I see you were new on Jan 8 and you see me following Ami's posts? Hmmmmmmm !! A strange occupation but what you had to say here is suitable for all-- our moods, our fears, our hurts, our anger.

I just put the past to rest this morning.

Strange that my sister, 2000 miles away, would send an email tonight that included:

I think that something clicks in us as we travel on our spiritual journey and every once in awhile we realize that we have turned a corner and things are getting better.  [I have no idea why I wrote that.  It just came off my fingertips, but I will leave it in, anyway.]

Now that is awesome!

By the way, gabben, who did you used to be on this board?

thank you both
xx
Izzy

[Overcomer]

I think Gabben  was Gabben.   she must have deleted herself and then came back.  One thing I remember about Lise is she definitely watches Am's back.  It is nice to have someone like that from time to time.

[Ami]

Gabben started as Gabben angel. One night when I was very distressed , it seemed like an angel showed up. It was Lise.
 When I say that God sends  angels,  it did actually cross my mind that she was an actual angel.(lol) Stranger things have happenend.
She and I have become dear friends.
I still think  God sent her, though,even though she is "real"(lol) .      Love    Ami