What are the chances? What's your take?

[flower]

What do you think the chances are that my Nmom put her SIL up to contacting me to infovacuum and then regurgitate the facts about my life  to her.

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Thanks so much for your insight and support.
 It aided my healing. Too much of my heart
was in this post to let it remain here for posterity on the web.
The post served its purpose and now it is time to
edit it or gently take it down.
 
To every thing there is a season, and a time
to every purpose under the heaven:  Ecclesiates 3:1

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What do you all make of today's message? It's not like she had such a strange life that she couldn't have other relatives over to her house. Do you think my mom put her up to it?  What are the chances?

[Anonymous]

flower,

An aunt dropping her niece like a hot rock? I wouldn't do that to my nieces. It's very wierd. Is she a strange or dysfunctional person?

Maybe her life *did* get strange.

Only return the call if you feel like it. If you don't feel like reconnecting with her, then ignore her message.


bunny

[Anonymous]

Hi Flower,

I agree with Bunny.  But if you do choose to contact her, you might just want to air out your feelings matter-of-factly, demonstrating self-respect and respect for her.  Something like, "you know, I enjoyed the times we visited in the past, but as you say, you dropped me like a hot rock.  So I don't know where our relationship really stands.  I like you but the on-again, off-again stuff is confusing to me.  What's up?"  or whatever.  

Doesn't have to be angry or hurt, if you are not feeling that way.  But it is confusing.  Maybe she knew you and your mom had a strained relationship and didn't want to get in the middle of things, etc etc.  God, who knows?  You seem like a pretty patient and understanding person, having let your aunt off the hook lightly in the past.  Your choice.  

I am not the best at keeping in touch and have probably hurt lots of people unintentionally in the process.    And there's no N lurking behind my insensitivity...take care, Seeker