Oh yes I know what you mean Violet. To always be wrong, shut out and shut down and yet to always be used for your empathy too.
Recently, I did something I have never done before. I made an appointment with an intuitive, like Carolyn Myss if you have heard of her? But not her, of course. Though this person was not a medical intuitive. Anyway, I went into it with an attitude of - I want to seek anything and everything to advance and learn and grow, especially anything that will help me conquer shame, be a better person, be wiser - you know.
Anyway, afterward what I found shocking was that she absolutely saw me. She experienced me. It has been a revelation to me because until I experienced it I did not realize how I so rarely experience it. I was shocked that I was shocked. Another shocking thing was - I am not so sure that I myself can experience me as straightforwardly as she did. I found it shocking that for her it is natural to really see people - still haven't gotten over it. And now I look around my regular environment and its denizens and am shocked how I've come to take for granted the lack of ability to see clearly, or even knowing they are not. It was amazing to be so seen, but it was disconcerting too. I think in some ways I have come to rely upon, to be used to, not being seen. Sort of like shoving all the mess in the closets - usually I don't even think of people noticing the closets.... Sorry to digress - your words about empathy and how nourishing it is (how despaired of!) inspired me to share that recent experience.
I agree there is so much empathy and insight and experience and wisdom here. Though, and I don't say this to take away from the board at all but to round out the impression, I don't think anyone will disagree with me if I observe - this board can be very turbulent sometimes! Misunderstandings or the way people who have never been free to go ahead and disagree have a skills deficit in disagreeing (how does one go about it - that's how I feel about myself - lack of skills), sometimes triggered if something expressed here sounds like the kind of things seen in the FOO. The learning is just incredible, from these things too. And the knowledge people share of the experience in these areas - it's amazing too. It's so helpful to listen to people who have the same life learning in this area - like a class for specialists where there are many experts in attendance - and the knowledge is hard won.
