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Controversial Issue

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nassim:
We already "did" Cinderella. See topic "Cinderella on Trial" back in April

Oh, sorry GP. I joined in May. I'll go back and look at that post. Thanks.

Nassim

Portia:
Hello David.  :) So how are your relationships now? Did your experience change what you wanted? (we were talking about men and sex recently and how men/women are built to want different things.)

Nassim:

--- Quote ---My brothers and sisters got their needs met more than I did because they didn't take my Mom so seriously.  
--- End quote ---
Have they said this to you? Were you the oldest/youngest? Sorry if you mentioned these things before, I've forgotten or missed them if you have. :?

nassim:
Hi Portia,

Sorry it's taken me a while to respond. I haven't been on the board too much lately.

I am a middling child (sic), so I had older and younger siblings. And they never said they got their needs met more than mine. It was just an observation since they don't seem as beholden to Nmother as I always was...i.e. they got on with their lives much sooner than I and seemed to have better boundries, etc..

But I did communicate with a sister in the past month. I told her I thought she was a terrific mother (she is), and she said something very poignant.
She said "I learned the art of apology". Now she hasn't done any research on the "N' thing. But she nailed it right there. Ns never, ever apologize. She also said she sent out Mom a Mother's day card that said "I learned everything I know about being a mother from watching you". Of course my Mom took this as a compliment. But my sister said she meant it as she learned everything NOT to do from watching Mom. This cracked me up and made me know that I was validated. I never got validation growing up, so this was very valuable.

And Portia, thanks for asking that clarifying question. I think it's important for people like us to be able to challenge and clarify (when we never were allowed to growing up).

Nassim

Onyx:
Potia

I'm very new at this and I hope I've hit the right button with this reply. Interesting question that many have tried to answer since time began...hahahaha! Erm..........here's my penniths worth in reply. I'm affraid to say that I don't generally think that there is a lot of differences anymore between mem and women. These days, I consider womem to be men with the slight difference being that they have a whomb!

I think the last 100 years of evolution have directly encouraged this.......and I don't really know if it's a good or bad thing! Women would complain with regard to the behaviour of thier men folks drinking.....etc. Now when pi**ed whilst partying hard and the weekend, I'm sure that there exists one or two groups of gals somewhere at a bar in the country having farting competitions and generally talking loudly to their mates about how they 'scored' last night and how ugly he was when she woke up beside him in the morning!

At the age of 45, I for one have noticed the changes. There was a time when girls danced around their handbags timidly at the disco on a friday night. Now they hunt in drunken packs ......it's all very masculine! Perhaps governments across the globe have put something in the beer.....I don't know.

I'm affraid to say that even with our divorce laws in th UK, their has been way to much social enginering on the subject to the point that a man sanity would have to be questioned seriously if he proposed. Women are men and vis a vis women are men......we have a unisex society with the only difference being the two groups have wobbly bits......in different places!

It's not good, nor is it bad........it's just evolution!

Portia:
Hi Nassim. You responded the next day – that’s fast! - but hey, there’s no time limit. Take a week, a month…no apology needed… :?

I agree, N’s never truly apologise. They might explain: ‘oh it was because of..’ but the blame, or responsibility, never stays with them. Sad. (‘Response-ability’ – the ability to respond, aka Empathy…I won’t state the obvious.)


--- Quote ---"I learned everything I know about being a mother from watching you". Of course my Mom took this as a compliment. But my sister said she meant it as she learned everything NOT to do from watching Mom.
--- End quote ---
 Ha ha ha!  :D I laughed! This is fantastic, brilliant, inspired. I love it. How great that your sister told you. Priceless. Thank you for telling us. :D

My middle name is ‘provocative’, probably a hang-over from being told I was too much of a ‘stirrer’ (trouble-maker) at home. But I like provocative. The status-quo = boredom, no changes, and that can kill. I like your posts Nassim.  :D P

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