Author Topic: Some thoughts about the "mini-Titanic, narcissistic parent poll"  (Read 3367 times)

gratitude28

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Re: Some thoughts about the "mini-Titanic, narcissistic parent poll"
« Reply #15 on: March 06, 2008, 10:57:22 AM »
Sometimes I think their brains are big rotten lumps...

All joking aside, I wonder if they are prone to some form of dementia, especially as they age. I have heard that they get worse as they age, and I think it's true. My NM does nothing to broaden her knowledge and, in fact, goes over and over past details, seeming to combine them into one big ball of pleasant memories. None of it really goes together. Times and events are so confused. They are sort of real, but out of proportion, too.

"There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable." Douglas Adams

jordanspeeps

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Re: Some thoughts about the "mini-Titanic, narcissistic parent poll"
« Reply #16 on: March 06, 2008, 08:11:30 PM »
PhoenixRising:
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And I believe that if we could document the family history of an N, we'd be able to pick out the pattern of abuse that got repeated through generations of families.

I looked up my family geneaology on both sides.  I was quite surprised to see and hear of a long legacy of abuse, neglect, discordant family relations, and extreme cases of narcissism on my mother’s side and an absolute dead end on my father’s side.  No history at all. Both parents gave me the impression they had “peachy keen” family lives growing up.

and:
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So then, the question would be: why and how do some of who were "left to die" in the water survive anyway????

I believe developmental psychology calls this type of survival mechanism “resilience.”  When despite severely negative odds, a child is able to thrive  in his life, this is the “resilient child.”

To add to the biological discussion:
From what I understand about DNA, scientists believe that our genes, in addition to programming for features like hair color, height, eye color, program for characteristics like intellectual ability, and emotional response Our DNA/RNA are involved in a constant repairing and mutation processes. This constant repairing and mutation, I would imagine, could lead to some long term variations that could pass on to future generations.  Not all mutations are bad, most are adaptive and lead to evolution of the species across thousands of years.

With that in mind, is it so outlandish to believe that DNA in its infinite complexity and beauty, holds the explanation for myriad behavioral/cognitive attributes required for protection/survival? (Some consider NPD to be a survival mechanism). Generations and generations of learning and surviving have encoded some things on our familial and collective genotype that MUST hold answers for us.  What if the likelihood to develop NPD could be located on the human genome?  Isn’t it worth knowing whether or not we could help at least identify NPD, or the propensity to develop it.  And to know what we are dealing with in identifying and treating it? 

What if your N had had this “likelihood” to be NPD identified when s/he was an infant and was “treated” empirically throughout his/her childhood?  Treated with love, kindness, balance, coping skills, etc.  Would we then be able to prevent narcissism in individuals?  After all isn’t it the lack of love, empathy, and compassion, (particularly during early infancy) that makes an individual so prone to NPD in the first place?

towrite

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Re: Some thoughts about the "mini-Titanic, narcissistic parent poll"
« Reply #17 on: March 07, 2008, 11:11:06 AM »
Dr. G - my parents are totally N, so I didn't respond to your poll. But your situation reminded me of the time my NF let me to drown in the undertow of the oceans b/c HE was finished swimming.
"An unexamined life is a wasted life."
                                  Socrates
Time wounds all heels.