KNOW EXCUSES!
Abusers will minimize, justify, deny, distort, lie about and blame others for their behavior to escape consequences, It is our responsibility to hold them accountable.
The following quotes are taken from abusers:
I wasn't able to stop there
It was an accident
I don't accept change
I didn't know how to be accountable
Accountability didn't stick with me
I didn't get my act together
I didn't adapt to the way society is now
My adrenaline overflowed
She was coming after me
It was an afterthought
I guess I got too aggressive
That's what got me aggressive
Everything was up in the air
Alcohol came in to play
Alcohol brought the violence out of me
Alcohol enhanced the problem
Alcohol escalates a little bit
The alcohol controlled me
Alcohol was involved
The alcohol started talking
Alcohol set me off like a keg of dynamite
I had an alcohol problem
I had a little alcohol
I'm more succeptable to violence on alcohol
The alcohol changes my personality
It was an alcohol related incident
I was really under the influence of alcohol
She allowed it
It was a lot at one time
There was an altercation happening
We got into a little altercation
I had no alternatives
She was anemic
I tried to let her know what life is like in America
That's how I am
I didn't analyze the situation
Anger comes out of me
The anger escalates
I have an anger problem
I was venting my anger
I couldn't control my anger
I had an anger problem
I did it out of anger
I don't handle anger well
Anger creates violence
I had an inability to control my anger
My anger controlled me
I didn't know how to vent my anger in a different way
I was into the anger thing
My anger got the better of my rational thinking
I got angry and didn't use patience
I didn't have the right answers
We kept upping the ante
It was an animal response to a perceived threat
An argument broke out
Before I knew it we got to arguing
It's an arguing type situation
We had a violent argument
The argument started in the bedroom and went into the kitchen
I was avoiding an argument
We got into an argument match
I got into a violent argument
The argument got out of hand
We had a basic sibling argument
We had a normal argument
We had a domestic argument
We just had an argument
We had physical arguments
It was an overheated argument
We were in a heated argument
We both used all of our artillery
She asked me to hit her
I was half asleep
I didn't have an opportunity to be assertive
It was a detrimental atmosphere
I kind of got an attitude
I have an attitude problem
I bring alot of attitude home with me from work
My attitude overtook my actions
It became automatic
It's kind of automatic
I was avoiding the bigger problem
I was avoiding hurting her
I was avoiding punching her
I didn't get away from the situation
I came back on her
My back was up against the wall
I backslid
I was just getting back at her in some demented way
I had a physical background
If she was a bad woman she deserved a pop in the eye
My relationship went bad
It got really bad
I'm baffled about it all
I was baited into it
She lost her balance
I went bananas
She was in the bar
Without thinking I barked
It was that strong German beer
That behavior came out
My behavior was wrong
My behavior repeated itself
It was violent behavior
Being what I am
Things got the best of me
It was the best I could do
I let my inner self get the best of me
I was beside myself watching
I wasn't a better man
I just avoided the bigger problem
Sometimes I get angry and blackout
I blew up
The flame blew
It built up inside until I blew up
It was a blight on our weekend
I was blind to what was going on
Sometimes I have blinders on
The abuse blossomed in our relationship
It's in my blood
The blood boiled
We blow up at each other
We had a blowout
I might have blown up
It happened out of the blue
I blurted out
My anger boiled over
I got to my boiling point
I was boiling
I just boiled over
I took so much until I get to the boiling point
I didn't put it in my book
All of a sudden, boom, it happens
Then, boom, out of nowhere
I was born with aggressiveness
I let women bother me
I was boxed in
I didn't engage my brain before my mouth
I didn't know how to break off
I didn't put on the breaks
We had a mutual breakup
I was brewing
I was pushed to the brink
That's when everything broke loose
I broke
I broke there
I was brought up that way
I guess things build up in me
It builds up
It was all built up inside me
A lot of things built up to it
Everything built up on me
I build and build and one day boom
I was like a bull in heat
It was the stress of my buttons being pushed
All the time people push my buttons
I let a lot of things push my buttons
She controlled my buttons
She pushed my anger buttons
She taunted me
I had a buzz on
Sometimes it just goes right by
I calmed her down
She destroyed my calm
I couldn't calm down
I couldn't keep it calm
That's the way it came out
The abuse came up out of me
It came out of me before I could stop and think about it
It just came out
I can't shut up
I wasn't careful
I was getting too carried away
I got carried away
I didn't catch myself
I didn't catch a key subject that came up
I was caught off guard
I got caught up in anger
I got caught up in my violent behavior
I got caught up in this one incident
I got caught up in the situation
Something caused me to do it
It was cause and effect
It takes two to cause
I was off center
I didn't get a second chance
I changed
I was going through some changes
Chemicals altered my way of judgment
My chemistry takes over
I was just being childish
I didn't have a choice
I had no choice
I made the wrong choice
I made a bad choice
I made bad choices
I made horrible choices
I made some real poor choices
I don't choose to yell and scream
I was in a violent circle
The whole circumstance came down
I don't know if I'm going to click
It wasn't the suit of clothes I wanted to put on
Cocaine showed the bad side of me
There was physical combat between us
The b-word comes out
It comes out
It just comes out that way
This problem kept coming up
My anxiety and frustration starts coming out
I couldn't communicate with her
Our communication didn't work
It takes two to tango
It's the only way I know how to cover up my communication skills
I put myself in a compromising situation
I couldn't concentrate
I jumped to conclusions
I had a nervous condition
I was conditioned to act that way
There was a confrontation
I got confused
I'm no good at confusion
I did not consciously do it
We had hostile contact
I was out of my context
I was containing her
I couldn't control my temper
I wasn't in control enough of what I said
It led on to where I got out of control
I couldn't talk without losing control
I lost control and everything bad
It was a situation I couldn't control
My efforts to control myself failed repeatedly
I was on the verge of losing control
I got out of control
I lost more control
I didn't have enough control
I tend to get out of control
Things got way out of control
I didn't know how to control myself
I was being controlled by someone else
I felt like she was controlling me
I was backed into a corner
We both lost control
I couldn't avoid a confrontation
I couldn't take it anymore!
I couldn't stop it
We're like a lot of couples in that respect
It had to run its course
I cracked
I went crazy
It was crazy
I just went crazy
My bad attitude crept back in
I crossed the border
I crossed over
I'm on a cruise
It was the culmination of a lot of bad things
It was a daily abusive thing
We did this dance together
I had a hard day
I brought a bad day home with me
I was having a hard day
It's just how I deal with things
I couldn't deal with it
I couldn't deal with the situation
I just f'ed up and made the wrong decision
I made that bad decision
I made the wrong decision
I made a very, very bad decision
I went off the deep end
It's a character defect
I reacted to defend myself
I was defending myself
I automatically take a defense
It was a defensive reaction
I was brought up on the defensive side
It was a delusional thought I acted on
I was deranged with bitterness
I'm not perfect at diagnosing people's problems
I didn't do it
I was diffusing her upset and irrational behavior
I was just directing her out
I have never directly abused them from a physical standpoint
I didn't have self-discipline
We had some discrepancies
She was just as bad
It's a disease
That's my attention deficit disorder
It was a minor dispute
It was a divorce issue
I was on her like a rabid dog
I don't know what I do
It was a domestic dispute
I took a dominant role
It was a real cheap door
She went down to the ground
I didn't realize what was going on until it all went down
I get angry when I drink
The drinking made it physical
I was driven toward that goal
I was drunk
She initiated the whole thing by being drunk
I was half way drunk
I go off the edge
I was right on the edge
She took me over the edge
I was set over the edge
I get too emotional
I get a little bit too emotional
I am emotionally weak
My emotions were at their wits' end
I should have handled my emotions better
My emotions take over
I didn't keep my emotions down
My emotions erupt
I can't handle my emotions
I had angry, violent emotions
I ended up hurting her shoulder
I ended up hitting her
I ended the argument
Drinking enhanced my problem
It had an energy of its own
I couldn't do enough for her
I didn't remove myself from the abusive environment
I'm not equipped to handle things ahead of time
It erupted in me
I finally erupted
Violence erupts
The argument would escalate
Our fight was escalating
Everything escalated
We escalated our voices
It escalated to physical abuse
It got escalated
The situation really escalated
It escalated from that
It kept escalating on
A small argument escalated into a serious situation
I got even with her
It was an abusive event
My evil side came out that night
I'm not the domestic violator her ex-husband was
We exchanged some words
There were words exchanged
I didn't see any exit
I more or less expected her to be obedient
I explode
I hold it in and then explode
Things build up and I explode
I exploded at her
I exploded at them
She was irrational and explosive
I was just expressing my opinion
We got in each others face
I was a failure
I took a fall
It's easy to fall into things
It had gone too far
We went farther than any time before
I was going too fast
My father doesn't have a lot of patience
It's a fault of mine
It's a fault that leads to argumentation
I returned the favor
My fear came out in abuse
I was fed up
I don't feel good
I fell into it
I fell back into it
I fell off the map
I fell back into that old person
It was a situation I fell into
It festered until it came out into the open
I couldn't figure her out
We ended up getting in a fight
Our fight got extreme
We had a fight
We had a fist fight
We got in a fight
It was because we were fighting
The fights started to get a little more physical
I find myself doing it
My finger poked her in the eye
My fingernails grow too fast
My fingernails were a little longer than they are now
It was the first thing that came to me
I did not use fisticuffs
I was too fixated
I flew off the handle
It's because of my flighty thinking
I fly off the handle
It set me off on a bad foot
I realized that I used too much force
She forced me to
I was forced to
We found ourselves in conflict
I found myself arguing back with her
I found myself somewhere I didn't want to be
I found myself chasing her
I'd freak out
I was in a frenzy
I was venting frustration
We f'ed up
I blew a fuse
I have a short fuse
I had a short fuse
I blew a gasket
She poured gasoline on the fire
I'm a Gemini
It was a generational cycle
In my generation it's the way we spoke
It was a generational thing
It's in my genes
I was genetically born with it
My anger came out like a bad Genie
I was on my gentlemanly way and she proceeded to hit me
I let her get to me
I let it get to me
She would get me to do it
I go off
I could only go so far
I let myself go
She got my goat
I got going with what I had to do
I got going
I'm not good in one-on-one relationships
I thought the violence was going to be gone
There was a gun involved
It had gone too far
She got to me
That's the way I grew up
I got into a groove of life
I didn't want to grow up
She wasn't grown up
It caught me off guard
That's the kind of guy I am
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