Dandylife......For me, it was a positive thing in that their conclusions support my experience - which is that BPD causes irrational thinking and makes a relationship with a BPD sufferer almost impossible. I can understand that these conclusions possibly might offer you comfort and peace of mind especially if you had any questions if it was something you were doing or them. BPD is not the cause but BPD is a clinical model used to describe clusters of symptoms resulting from severe but now repressed abuse. These researchers make no mention of this. Why? The sufferer continues to act out in the present to old repressed unconscious traumas. The unconscious state is triggered by real time stimuli and he reacts to these situations, depending on the repression, as if it were real, like it was back then. It's not and this confuses observers and even the sufferer. Because the trauma and associated emotions are repressed he can't understand that he is reacting in the past, like it was, rather than his actions being "unreal" in regard to reality at the moment. If we look at this his reactions then become easy to explain but the ABUSE has to be acknowledged for this to be understood. Why do these researchers avoid the issue of abuse? I think b/c they are in repression too and are absolutely terrified of feeling once again what happened to them. They soothe their own fears by this type denial in their own research. Treatments can be developed if the truth is known. Not trusting may have been very appropriate in a dangerous childhood but unless this person is aware of being abused he continues to act and feel like there is still a real danger. Unconscious trauma just doesn't go away, at least until it's consciously felt and integrated, otherwise it's always being acted out in the present with no real solution.
"They conclude that people with borderline personality disorder either have a distorted sense of generally accepted social norms, or that they may not sense these norms at all. This may lead them to behave in a way that disrupts trust and cooperation with others. By not responding in a way that would repair the relationship, people with borderline personality disorder also impair the ability of others to cooperate with them."IMO we hardly need a "research study" to see this. This scientific study to come up with that? What is needed is to address the effects of childhood abuse and the distortions this later creates head on. What I also see here is a tendency for these researchers to blame the victim which serves to maintain their "power" which helps maintain their denial of their own abuse. I do believe most people, to varying degrees, have been abused in childhood and much of this is repressed. IMO their language/thoughts here may also be indicative of an unconscious display of their own latent hatred, scapegoating a victim, resulting from repressed emotions in themselves. Otherwise they would respond with empathy rather than blame disguised as well intentioned and "honest" research but only if they know their own truth.
TT....I am glad you have come to a conscious decision abt how much you want to uncover in your life. If you feel good now perhaps this is enough. You are exactly right analysing this will not solve anything but it may point us in the right direction to truly understand and feel what happened without illusions, and this does heal as we put our new found awareness into practice now.
Miss Piggy....Just a guess here, I have no idea whether it's true or not. Maybe your father has an old unmet need that has driven him his whole life. Perhaps he wasn't loved or never received attention from his parents, if so and he repressed this trauma he might still be driven to fill this old need. Unconscious unmet needs just don't go away, he might try to resolve them forever unless he faces the truth, then it can be finally resolved once he understands what really drives his decisions and emotions now. Maybe these unconscious needs are louder than your words and don't make much sense? Just a thought.......James
