Narcissists Tend To Become Leaders

[Dr. Richard Grossman]

Hi everybody,

In case you missed it last Fall (and in the no surprise here category):  Narcissists Tend to Become Leaders   ( http://www.livescience.com/culture/081007-narcissist-leaders.html)

Combine that with:

Lack of 'team spirit' at work tied to depression    ( http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20090414/hl_nm/us_work_depression)


And you get a lot of misery at work...

Best,

Richard

[SilverLining]

Interesting.   It sure seems the level of narcissism in high positions, both political and business,  has been increasing over recent decades, along with rates of depression.  I haven't experienced much of a feeling of teamwork in any organization I have worked in for the past twenty years, and it seems half the employees are either taking antidepressants or self medicating some other way. 

[getnbtr]

I often wonder if being able to travel and spead ourselves out through the world hasn't caused alot of this. At one time community held us responsible for our actions and everyone had to work together because we lived closer together and new each others families and friends. Now if you want to lie about yourself and are far from your home, who would know. I think there are more N's because of this. It's too easy to hide now. People are too busy to take the time to reach out and care now too. Just my thoughts. My NH has a business and he plays his employees against each other and against me, he has gotten to the point that he has asked me to make an appointment to come see him at the office...I am the Vice Pres.!!! I don't listen to him so he makes his emplyees suffer when I show up, It madning. He's sinking his own ship and everyone else is responsible for the bailing out. He lives in his own world and is King of whatever he decides at the time. Of course he has alot of people fooled. But as he grows older his mask is slipping off in front of people. I just wish it would fall off!!!!!! You just can't be a team when the captain isn't a member!!!!

[Ami]

As`I face myself, I can see how N and depression  relate. I think I had depression  b/c of a distortion of the self. I was not  expressing my genuine self but putting it out there for other people's evaluation and conclusions.I did not have a genuine connection to my feelings and thoughts. I was afraid of them b/c I was so shamed for them. I was afraid to feel them  myself.I was a stranger to my real self.
N's have a grotesque distortion of self and perhaps that is why they suffer from depression.Perhaps, depression is from that lack of connection within
 These are some of my thoughts,not meant to be about clinical depression but a sense of  how depression operates in me.
    Ami



PS If this is a hijack---sorry.

[SilverLining]

I often wonder if being able to travel and spead ourselves out through the world hasn't caused alot of this. At one time community held us responsible for our actions and everyone had to work together because we lived closer together and new each others families and friends. !!!!

I'm with you.  I think in many ways the human race has outsmarted itself with the invention of technologies which supposedly draw people together, but actually tear community apart.  Without the physical proximity and day to day contact, there is less restraint on N-ish behavior, and more incentive to act in mostly self serving ways.

I have a fantasy of a real community based on actual contact and shared interests, rather than electronically mediated connection with supposedly signficant biological relatives.   For a long time I thought I might find it through work, but that turned out to be a total bust.   Everybody  in the work place is convinced their significant relationships are with their own set of biological relatives, and most everybody is going crazy as a result.  It's kind of a self perpetuating downward spiral.  I think it's the reason so many people are addicted to goofy superficial talk on their cell phones.  It's a substitute for real connection, and since it isn't real they can't get enough.   

[getnbtr]

Where I live in Pa. The Amish neighbors do have community based relationships, the church family is decided by where they live. Church is a their homes and they take turns, and they don't have regular medical insurance, the church pulls together and does fund raisers if they can't collect enough from the church family to help one of their own. If they have a problem that the family can not settle the church elders take over...it straitens things out pretty quick! They still have their problems just like the rest of us, but the support keeps it to a minimum.
The pastors are chosen and don't volunteer themselves, they have to be asked, that keeps the N's from running things.
 So, SilverLining...they are living your fantasy...you should become Amish! That is if you don't mind getting places going 4 miles an hour down the road behind a horse!!!

[sKePTiKal]

getnbtr:

The Amish (and Mennonites) aren't immune from the same dysfunctional issues of the rest of society, as I know from my own experience - and family history. In general, they appear to be (externally) very peaceful, satisfied, and supportive. Scratch a little below that layer and you'll find the same humanity that exists everywhere.

[getnbtr]

Yes, I know, that's why I mentioned that they still have problems just like the rest of us. When the pastor is asked to be a pastor instead of choosing that path, I feel it keeps the N leaders down to a minimum. I am close to my neighbors and do hear about their problems, they keep each other in check much more than just being out there in the world with people that do not know them well.

I was being sarcastic about becoming Amish...

[mudpuppy]

 

Everybody  in the work place is convinced their significant relationships are with their own set of biological relatives

Isn't that true for most people?
Seems kind of natural to me unless the biological relatives are a bunch of flaming Ns.
Thank goodness most people's aren't.

mud

[SilverLining]

Everybody  in the work place is convinced their significant relationships are with their own set of biological relatives

Isn't that true for most people?
Seems kind of natural to me unless the biological relatives are a bunch of flaming Ns.
Thank goodness most people's aren't.

mud

Hi Mud. I question how functional it is for people even if they don't come from an especially N-ish environment.  To discount the people we spend most of our time around while relying on often long distance relationships with relatives seems an alienated way to live.  In my experience, many of the people who live this way don't seem particularly happy.  The bio-family becomes a crutch.  Both of my siblings operate this way, though of course my relatives aren't a good example of a functional family...    

[sKePTiKal]

getnbtr:

I should've remembered to mention that these societal sub-groups also have their own ways of managing and dealing with the people who transgress the community values.... and typically the "common good" of the community trumps the "rights" of the individual.

I was a little grumpy when I last posted.