Author Topic: Hello All.  (Read 1360 times)

axa

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Hello All.
« on: July 29, 2010, 01:56:18 PM »
Hi everyone,

It has been a while since I have ventured onto the site.  Mostly I have been terribly busy and just getting on with life.  I am writing from Italy where I am house sitting for two months, learning Italian, very, very slowly and writing.  I have been thinking about you all recently and how much my life as changed since I first visited this wonderful site.  My friend said to me recently that I had "re-invented" myself, not really, just instead of putting all my energy into Ns I have focused my energy on what makes me feel alive.  I am in my second year of my PhD, hard, wonderful work.  CB so much time reading, you would love it. 

Life is good.  I am content, single, and so less afraid in the world.  For me the latter has been a huge opening up of all sorts of things.  I am no longer fearful of everything.  Before I came to Italy alone for two months I got a little anxious, what am I doing, what if I will be lonely etc, what if I can't find the apartment.....blah, blah, blah.  Well it really was quite straightforward and I realised the worst thing that could happen is that I would feel afraid/lonely/...solution: buy a new ticket and go home, not exactly rocket science!   I think so much of our lives are given over to fear that focusing on others takes us away from that fear and terror of being out of control.  Well, it has turned out very well and I wanted to share this little adventure with you.

I wish you all joy and strength, especially those who were so supportive of me in the bad old days.

Very, very best wishes,

Axa.

teartracks

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Re: Hello All.
« Reply #1 on: July 29, 2010, 05:14:41 PM »




((((((((((Axa))))))))))

Good to hear that life is good for you, that you're doing things you enjoy and that your territory is continuously expanding! 

Hugs,

tt






CB123

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Re: Hello All.
« Reply #2 on: July 30, 2010, 07:33:32 AM »
Oh AXA!  So good to hear from you.  I often wonder how and where you are.  Italy sounds wonderful right about now!

So glad to hear you are reading up a storm.  I miss my reading days--even though I cram it into every spare corner of my day.  I have books in every spot I frequent! But nothing like what you are doing and I am jealous.  I cant remember what your PhD will be in?  Are you still doing lots and lots of writing?  Remember your first paper when you were so scared and how you completed it with flying colors?  I'll bet you are just polishing papers off without even breaking a sweat these days.

You can read updates from me on other threads, so I wont do that here.  I wish you could pop in to say hi more often.  Love to hear from you.

CB

When they are older and telling their own children about their grandmother, they will be able to say that she stood in the storm, and when the wind did not blow her way -- and it surely has not -- she adjusted her sails.  Elizabeth Edwards 2010

sKePTiKal

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Re: Hello All.
« Reply #3 on: July 30, 2010, 09:02:58 AM »
HI Axa! Your post brought a big grin to my face - it's so good to hear you're doing well.

I would sorta echo your friend's assessment of reinventing yourself. I've been reading that by "enriching" our environment with new places, people, and interesting things to think about we can actually repair or compensate for the types of wounds, loop-feedback patterns, or early experiences that once seemed like a permanent, life-limiting disability.

You seem to be living proof of that premise!

Big hug to ya...
Success is never final, failure is never fatal.

Hopalong

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Re: Hello All.
« Reply #4 on: July 30, 2010, 10:32:34 AM »
Axa?
In Italy?
Drinking good red wine and studying?
House sitting?

BLISSSSSSSSSSSSS.
I am so happy to hear you.

love,
Hops
"That'll do, pig, that'll do."

Gaining Strength

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Re: Hello All.
« Reply #5 on: July 31, 2010, 05:53:17 PM »
Axa - so good to here from you and about you.

Italy for two months, reading and working on your PhD.  Happily single.
But above all, what you write about fear is so true.  I connect so well to it.
I look forward to living into those words when I can experience fear and do it anyway.

I was encouraging my little boy to do just that today as I drove him 7 plus hours to a two day meditation learning experience - something against his preferences.  I urged him to remember the many times he has been fearfully resistant to opportunities and activities that I have chosen for him and yet found them to be not only acceptable but quite wonderful.

Week before last in karate camp they focused on a saying about courage each of the five days.
One of them was the statement that courage is not the absence of fear but feeling it and doing it anyway.

So glad you had the courage to go to Italy.

Love to you and hope you pop in again soon. - GS