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lighter:
Hey Hops:

I think being charming is having the ability to make other people feel validated, appreciated, and special in their own skin.

Everyone needs to to feel that whatever is at the core of their being, is known and accepted by someone.

Charming people let us know that they see what's inside, and that it's what we want them to see, and that they believe it's true.

People who act charming, in order to manipulate, aren't really charming at all.

They're manipulative.

Lighter

Hopalong:
Ahhhhh, thank you all....
These are such great responses.
For me, charm is a "chewy" topic--probably in part because of Suthrun Womanhood training.

One weird thing about Nboss (well, there are many) is that now that I've seen him with his mask off, sometimes he'll say something to me that's clearly the straight truth. To him, anyway.

Today, it was: "What we're all trying to do, morally, is spend as much time as we can in the "gray area" and find out what its borders are, how far we can go."

I almost choked on my sandwich.

Hops

Guest:
"What we're all trying to do, morally, is spend as much time as we can in the "gray area" and find out what its borders are, how far we can go."

I'm having some mental contortions trying this one on in different ways. Oh dear Hops!

sKePTiKal:

--- Quote ---Suthrun Womanhood
--- End quote ---

Hops, do you mind if I use this as a segue to a whole new topic? It's a rather broad, all-encompassing one... and I been a-thinkin' on it for a while, since I tripped over a thought that came out of the blue... seemingly. I think you'll have plenty to say about it!  ;)   We've kinda danced around it here, for a long while.

I like what Lighter said about charm... there is real, genuine charm from the "goodness" of the person. Not all charm is intentionally manipulative... now the question, is being able to tell the difference! And I don't think we can without a lot of experience with a person, except for those rare individuals that radiate goodness like a bright sun in mid-winter.

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