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Lupita, how are you?

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Lupita:
If you remember to find pleasure in your daily abolutions...... creating sacred space in your home............ caring for yourself....... continuing to do things that bring you pleasure......

I feel pleasure in piano, dancing, and resting peacefully at home. But the most pleasure I have is being with a man, either sitting at a beach observing the sunset, or walking, or talking, just the company of men makes me feel complete. God made me that way. I am trying to feel different but it is hard.


you will meet new people, and be in a good place to make decisions about them.

To decide not to fall in love? is that a decision or comes from your needs? or from your what? if you are full you do not feel like eating, but I am so hungry of love!!!!!

Coming from a position of want, not need.

Understanding what a boundary is, having them in place, and defending them appropriately.....
consitently, means you'll continue growing.

Boundary? if you are wishing the human contact, how do you put a boundary in place? Hope I become an iceberg and do not feel any need.

It means you'll be able to stop learning the same lessons over and over, and move on to new ones.

I disagree in this because I am in better posiition, do not feel devastated, I understand what happens and do not get depressed. So, the lesson is learned, but I donot give up, I keep trying and hope that the Lord will provide a good man for my dreams.


A man wanted to come and practice with me ay my home and I said, there is no place in my house we have to plractice ina  studio. Even though I am desiring the opposite. Is that learning?

lighter:
Lupe:

You do sound like you're in a better space, and if you can turn your attention to enjoying what you DO have, you'll find company when you least expect it.

Happiness is a magnet.

As for not letting the guy come to your home, I guess you want to make sure he's a good guy, get to know him better, and make good decisions based on facts, not your need to be with someone.  This is a good thing, right?
lighter

Lupita:
How do you suppress the need and magnify the want?
I have many wants but have more needs that wants, I know that. But it does not go away by it self. Even though I do affirmations, mirror work, posters, etc. Practice meditation, think about detachment, etc.
Still, the needs are there.
 I think it is like diabetes, a disease that will be controlled but never cured. I will always have the need of a man or a love even if it is a woman mothering me. With just that I think I might be fixed. But I am not wrong, and there is nothng wrong with me. I am OK as I am and will be OK anyway. So, I dont make any sense.

lighter:
Lupe:

It's human to have needs, wants and desires.

We all do, but we must keep in mind boundaries, and skills (such as the ability to put off gratification) so we can make better choices.

Learning is a lifelong journey.  We never stop.  Growth goes on, and unfortunately, discomfort and pain is usually the catalyst. 

As they say in AA, replace replace replace old habits with new habits...... they get less alien, and eventually become pleasures if we stick with them.

We can accept and love ourselves as human beings, while mindfully changing habits, or behaviors that don't serve us well.

I think I've you've grown a lot through the years, Lupita. 
 
Don't you?
Lighter

Lupita:
He called me and wrote me today. He says he is coming back and he wants to pursuit a relationship with me. He says that he does not want to be married to his wife anymore. Of course, I dream of a man by my side and somebody to love to. But I do not want to be hurt again. He is handsome like very handsome. plays the accordion, loves to hear me play the piano, likes to dance, he has all attributes that I like. I do not want to suffer. I do not want to lose the few acquaintances that I have now like I did with M. I want to give him a chance, but I am afraid that God will punish me ofr that. He has been separated from his wife for eleven years, he said, they have been married many years but the last eleven they have not been living together and he was having a single life but now she wants him back and that triggered that he wants the divorce. So, it is not my fault that they might divorce, God knows that.
Anyway, I have a prospective dance partenr that is potentially very good and dont want to lose him becuase of G. His nams is G. Need to work on detachment. 

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