Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board
Voicelessness and Emotional Survival => Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board => Topic started by: Hopalong on November 16, 2007, 01:45:38 AM
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Present for y'all:
http://www.davidroche.com/anne-lamott/
love,
Hops
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Hops,
Just had a moment before I go this morning- I am so glad I peeked at the board and my curiosity was piqued! Thank you so much for that present. It was just what I needed right now on so many levels.
Cat
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"I've been forced to find my inner beauty," he said in closing. "Doing that gave me a deep faith in myself. Eighty percent of the time. And that faith has been a window, so I can see the beauty in you, too. The light in your eyes. Your warmth. So thank you."
Emphasis is mine.
I've been disturbed by a recent tone on the board that those who are able to see the good in others (even N's) or those who do not respond to the abuse with co-dependant behaviors, must not have suffered the same level of abuse (and frankly I've been feeling rather invalidated by the stance). This helps me feel validated again.
Thanks Hops. Thank you very much.
Joy
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dear believe_in_yourself
wonder who you are?
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dear believe_in_yourself
wonder who you are?
Hi Ami, It is me... Joy
Sorry I didn't notice your post sooner.. you used a name so similar to mine. Guess I need glasses! :D
In case anyone wonders why I believe this is Ami -- I sent a PM telling her that I'd received an odd email after posting as sjoy and it was clearly someone that knew me because my email was hidden (and things said indicated that this person knew my history of abuse). I since realized that it must have been a coincidence.
I believe that believe_in_honesty is Ami. Period.
Joy
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Well, that and that this post follows me saying that I felt invalidated by Ami's recent posts. (although I didn't name her)
I think it is particularly cruel (assuming that it is indeed Ami) to bring up my identity in light of the incident that caused me to run from the board in the first place... and the issues that I have about safety and being able to go places and speak to people.
Bye folks.
Joy
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Thank you Hops! :D
"We with facial deformities are children of the dark," he said. "Our shadow is on the outside. And we can see in the dark: we can see you, we see you turn away, but one day we finally understand that you turn away not from our faces but from your own fears. From those things inside you that you think mark you as someone unlovable to your family, and society and even to God.
I think that children with N parents and especially an N mom can relate to this. I know that I can, especially at this particular stage of my healing.
Having and N mom makes you feel like you have facial deformities (this is not to minimize or take away from the unique experience of what this wonderful man went through or what anyone with physical deformities does but I'm sure he would agree with the pain and loss of lack of mirroring he needed and missed as a child because of his face.
I've always been told that I am pretty, dimples, long black hair, even features and clear skin. However, I never knew why guys would follow me or other woman would scowl at me. I always thought is was because they could see how bad I was...that perhaps they saw how flawed I was, wounded and emotionally disturbed.
Just yesterday I received an email from a woman who I sat next to at a conference I attended this past summer. She was telling someone else in the email, who had brought my name up, what a lovely visit her and I had while we were having lunch and what a gentle gracefilled pretty lady I was. I can recall later, after our lunch, how I walked away and said to myself, "she must see that I am an idiot or super messed up."
I think in my mom's eyes my emotions and needs made her turn away from me in fear.
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I have no idea how I wound up on this thread. I don't post under different names. Joy,I really have no earthy idea what you are talking about.Please clarify it for me. Any post without my name on it( or anonymous) is NOT me. Ami
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I'm about 80% sure this is a very odd little thread.
mud
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Exactly my discernment and thoughts.
Leah
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Could it be a possible smear campaign?
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I'm going to leave this thread and start a Version 2 on it because I love this guy a lot and would love to hear more stuff about the topic generally. (Was reading a Cary Tennis column on aging that got me thinking in that direction...)
love y'all,
Hops
PS--NOT feeling "hijacked"--doesn't bother me, I can hop around... xxoo
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I'm sorry Hops. Your post did help me and I enjoyed the article very much. Feel free to delete this thread. I'm surprised that no one else sees anything sinister in believe_in_honesty's post. :: shrug ::
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Whether there was anything sinister in bih's post is an open question. It would seem to indicate some past knowledge of you, but a lot of people read this board.
However stating that you believe bih is Ami "period" with no apparent concrete evidence and that she was somehow harrassing you seems a bit of a stretch as well. Especially as your complaint seems to be that whoever it is, is seeking your identity when you yourself signed your first post "Joy".
bih may very well have had a sinister intent toward you, but accusing anyone by name of being this person should only be done if you are in possesion of proof IMO.
mud
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Thank you.Mud. I felt very 'weird" to be thought of like that. Many,many thanks, Ami
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(((((((((((( Ami ))))))))))
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Dear ((((((((((((((((Ami)))))))))))))))))),
Love,
tt
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Thanks TT,
The person went away and I felt very loved and validated. Thanks so much Love Ami