Debbie Downer

[Overcomer]

We have a lady who comes into work and as with everyone we have been very nice to her.  She complained to me about some specifics so I found what I thought was the right book for her.  She started coming in ALL the time and each time she comes in more negative talk.  A Debbie Downer.  She needs meds or something.  I feel there are a couple people on the board who are almost as negative as this lady.  I do not think she realizes it nor do I think they may know it either.  How can we help them?

[Izzy_*now*]

Maybe she is angry because the book is telling her to examine then let go of the past?

....and the more she thinks about it, the angrier she gets, and the more uncomfortable, because she would be moving out of a comfort zone  (bad as it is) into one she has never known.

A Never-Known Zone!

[Overcomer]

 Well I was really empathic towards this woman at first and then she started showing up at church and then she ended up sitting next to me and I had to ask her to move down so my children could sit by me.  Anyway it seems like she was thriving on the attention but she started to go overboard.  I would be helping a customer and she would follow me around and continue to complain while I was trying to help someone else.  She went overboard and I think we all need to look at ourselves and try not

[alone48]

It is hard to tell someone something about themselves they can't see. I had a neighbor who would come over everyday after work to complain about EVEYTHING. Finally one day I asked her if she could tell me the positive things that had happened in her day because I just needed to relax after a hard day myself. She took it quite well and that seemed to set a standard. Somedays she would just rant, but when I really couldn't take it I would tell her Could this just be a relaxing day....seemed to work as we are still friends/but not neighbors.

[Overcomer]

to dominate the board with our issues and more issues and more issues and negativity.  I feel that some take over like this woman took over our store.  Now we avoid this woman.  If she would have taken some of our advise and report some of the victories she has had.  Instead she goes on and on about her problems and it is exhausting.

[Gaining Strength]

But Overcomer here on the board we can just ignore those who dominate with their endless, never changing natterings of negativity.  Pick and choose whose posts you read - it will really help.  You can't quite do that with the lady at work but here you can just not read those.

[changing]

Hi Gaining Strength-

I know that this is a serious subject, but your last post made me smile- reminded me of Agnew's "nattering nabobs of negativity"- so funny,right up there with Oscar Wilde!!!

Love,

Changing