Hi, Lighter
Maybe you could do a family book at some point - a kind of 'This Is Your Life' type thing - important events with accompanying pictures that sum up each person. Fairly brief rather than everything anyone ever did. I think some of the photo shop type companies do it so you just upload the pictures and write the captions and then you can either print it or just email it to people? I agree, it is hard to know what to do, it feels bad to just throw things away but they don't mean anything to other people so no-one else wants them. Maybe if you do go down the air bnb/hotel type route with the lake house you could do a family history display in one of the shared areas, linked to a bit of local history? It's not everyone's cup of tea but I always love reading about who was there before and how they got to be there.
I just feel a bit disconnected where my aunty is concerned; she isn't the one who's always been very kind but she also wasn't unkind. It's just such a messed up family that healthy connections didn't happen with a lot of people. I think the time we were kids played a part in it as well; in those days children were seen and not heard so when we went to visit we just sat there until it was time to go home. There wasn't really much interaction between adults and kids so once we were old enough not to have to go we didn't, and then of course it gets that you only see people at weddings and funerals. If I had an air bnb place I wouldn't be putting the family history on the wall lol, I'd send it to a psychology department or something

I just feel sad that she's passed, as have so many, and her final months were without visits from family and friends and she had two nurses by her bed when she passed rather than her own kids. Funerals are limited to ten people at the moment which isn't even enough for children, partners and grandchildren so people have to watch it online which just seems so impersonal. I know it's necessary at the moment but it does make it harder. So, yep, it's just a tough time all round for people. I'm glad she wasn't in pain, though, that's something at least.
Upstairs decluttering is more or less done - a few bits and pieces but not much. I freed up enough space in the drawers in my bedroom to be able to decant a storage box of son's Lego pieces that was on the landing into the drawers. Next step is to work our way through some of the tins we stocked up on through winter to free up a shelf or two there and then the CDs that are on the landing can go into that space and that's another area cleared. I've got two boxes ready to go to the online shop so will post them today, and another one ready to go tomorrow. I've bagged the clothes for recycling into smaller bags so I can carry them and I'll take them to the shop two at a time each evening; it will probably take the week and then they'll be clear as well. Kitchen and garden aren't too bad and just need a good clean and a few bits relocating. I've got lots of photos I want to sort out, lots of son's education stuff that needs sorting (with a new at home plan writing up) and then - the paperwork.
It doesn't feel too bad to deal with? I've decided to invest in a multi-page scanner, so that I can scan a stack of pages at once instead of feeding them in one by one. The best buy (from what I've read up on) is quite pricey so I'm going to look for a second hand one; if I can't get one I'll go for the next one down which was more affordable, and I can sell it on once I've finished with it. It should make dealing with it faster. I'm also going to prioritise things that will be useful going forward - I'd like son's capacity formally assessed so that I can apply for permission to act on his behalf instead of having to go through the process every time consent is required. I also want to review the possibility of legal action with regard to negligence at birth as wires have been crossed there and I'm not sure exactly what happened, so I need that straight in my mind (and possibly sent to another sol). He also needs a medication review and there's a small amount of paperwork needed for that just so we have dates, diagnoses and so on. One file of current, up to date information and I've been working on a kind of instruction manual that gives (a) information to anyone taking care of him and (b) talks him through things he needs to do step by step. I do keep wondering as well if I need to set up some sort of power of attorney for me, so that someone else can act on his behalf on my behalf if I'm incapacitated, if that makes sense? Even possibly just having someone else who can access his bank account so that at least he's got some money for the things he needs if I get hit by a bus or something. So I'll work on those things first as they're necessary and I can scan, sort and shred as I go. That will take care of quite a lot of it anyway, and then hopefully the rest will be just scan and shred and it won't be too difficult to do. I am feeling quite excited about having a big pile of paper on one side of the table, feeding it through the scanner, then feeding it through the shredder and then putting it out for recycling

Lol. It doesn't feel like a daunting task now, more like something I can work on a bit at a time, gradually clearing space as I do. It feels like we're getting ready to move on, both in terms of physically moving as well as moving past everything that happened in his childhood. Moving into a new phase as adults, together but with our own lives as well. That feels like a good thing to work towards just now xx