Author Topic: Crude but wonderful words of wisdom  (Read 6260 times)

CC

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Crude but wonderful words of wisdom
« on: November 22, 2003, 01:56:31 PM »
This is a rather crude and out of character comment for me to make, however, a dear friend of mine many years ago said these wise words to me when I was fighting with an old boyfriend:

"If it sucks longer than an hour or two, get rid of it! "..

Such a simple phrase, and said almost in a comical manner at the time... but I can tell you there have been some serious contemplative moments in my life where that phrase has popped into my head and helped me recognize the right decision about a choice in a relationship!  What it really is referring to is your gut feeling of "this isn't good for me if it is causing this much unhappiness" or "am I compromising my feelings out of unhealthy need".  

Thanks, old friend!
CC - 'If it sucks longer than an hour, get rid of it!'

I_am_mine

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Crude but wonderful words of wisdom
« Reply #1 on: November 26, 2003, 06:18:42 PM »
CC, do you mind if i borrow that phrase?  I don't think it's particularly crude, I just think it "cuts to the chase".

I'm thinking of making tons of sticky notes, and posting them all over my house, my car, everywhere...if I could see my own forehead, I'd have it tattooed there!

Seriously, it really makes a lot of sense...please thank your friend for me, too!

bobbie

CC

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Crude but wonderful words of wisdom
« Reply #2 on: November 28, 2003, 11:26:10 AM »
By all means Bobbie, please add it to your stickies! you're right - that's what I liked about it.  Its very bottom-line and I think that's why it works.
CC - 'If it sucks longer than an hour, get rid of it!'

Jaded911

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Crude but wonderful words of wisdom
« Reply #3 on: November 28, 2003, 07:12:47 PM »
CC,

Snort, Snort!!

 Thank you CC for guiding me toward something to be thankful for on Thanksgiving.  You gave me the ability to look beyond  my feelings of sadness.   This helped me get past my pain on the holiday.   It helped me understand that I had every right to feel the way I did.   He had no right to do what he did.  He sucked everything out of me emotionally and spiritually.  It hit me, poof be gone with your N bad self.   I suddenly thought, "ya, duh,  no wonder I  always felt tired, he drained me emotionally, its a wonder I had any feelings left. "  You continue to take take take and pretty soon theres nothing left.  You have to deposit to replenish every now and then, did he do that?  Nope he sure did not!
The light bulb went off with this one!  

I am thankful that I am sitting here alone hurting over this relationship.  I might be hurting over what happened but atleast I am able to hurt and by gosh my hurt is once again about me, it is for my feelings.  I used to hurt because I could not please him, couldn't say the right things to him, never did anything right, blah blah blah.  Felt good that my pain was about me again,  not because of him blaming me for hurting his feelings or not being able to please him."  Dang right it hurts, dang right my hurt is all about my feelings again.  Yup, when you have an emotional vampire sucking the life out of ya, the sooner you rid it the less emotions they suck out of ya.  

Heehee, longer than an hour, snort.  How about that saying, I love it.
Fool me once, shame on you.  Fool me twice, shame on me!

Jaded

Anastasia

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If you can't play nice, I ain't play'in with you anymore!!!
« Reply #4 on: November 30, 2003, 09:44:45 AM »
That is my new philosophy of life.
I have never felt so happy as lately when I have shucked all those family members who drag me down.  For years I put up with their demeaning remarks--in the name of keeping peace in the family--while they went on to insult me and make all kinds of cruel remarks to me.  On hindsite, I wonder why I didn't do this years ago but I finally said ENOUGH!  
I have my nurturing and caring needs met by good friends and by caring for myself, too...and caring and nurturing others in return.
I am not here to be anyone's whipping boy....nobody should.
And those family members who try to bind you to them simply because you are "family" and they preach this to you trying to GUILT you to be with them out of duty--go to hell!  The only reason you cling to family is cause you are so obnoxious you have no friends!  Well, that's not me...and I don't believe in feeling obligated anymore...and, know what?  I am so much happier now that you, Mr. Obnoxious Family Member, are out of my life totally!!!
So, if you can't play nice, I ain't play'in with you anymore!

Jaded911

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Crude but wonderful words of wisdom
« Reply #5 on: December 01, 2003, 02:31:54 PM »
I do not understand why some people get off saying mean and hurtful things to other people.  I put up with so much of this from my xN.  What really hurts about this ordeal is that I busted my ars for him.  I raised his child, worked, school, and kept up two houses.  He used to rave and rave about how much I do for him.

Now I am psychotic,  a liar, a manipulating piece of dog do.  Well, it hurts to know what he did not think of me.  I would never talk about a family member or a loved one the way he does.  

Your post got me thinking about how my brother is in public.  Every word that comes out of his mouth is a slam.  I know what his problem is, he is basically a failure in life.  He was in law school, bombed out because he was to busy toking.  He never married, no children, and thank god for that.  But he still finds it necessary to drag everyone down to his level.  

Pfft, I give up thinking about why so many people are so messed up in the head.  I am not perfect by any means but dang, every corner you turn theres someone cramming it down your throat.  I believe a lack of empathy is the root of most of the crap.  I just hope I stay clear of them there meanies.
Fool me once, shame on you.  Fool me twice, shame on me!

Jaded