2 steps up, 2 steps down, 2 on the same place.

[cats paw]

Hello Lupita,

   I haven't had much to add to what others have said about the dating, but I did notice something that I could say, and that is I
   am celebrating and sending joy your way to congratulate you on your citizenship.

Best Wishes !

cats paw

[lighter]

CB, but in some way you are much healthier than me. You are still friends with that guy. You are still going out with him. So, you handled it perfectly. I did not. I left my guard off. I fell.

Oh phooey. 

All you have to do is dance with him

or dance without him,

h a p p i l y,

at the next dance class

and your diginity is restored.

Be friendly with him.

Let him know that you

are

still

friends.


Of course..... you're done with him and you'll be waaaaaaayyy too busy to dance with him outside of dance class.

BTW..... are there BETTER dancers, than him, in that dance class?

Time to spend more time with them..... dancing with better dancers improves your dancing: )

[Lupita]

I asked two ladies from the gym if they wanted to dance at my dance school Saturday meetings and they said yes. one of them aked another lady. This last asked her ex husband to come and dance with the four of us. i asked  Two of my classmates to come unmder the promise that I would personally practie with them and help them, so at the end we had a very big group of wonderful epople whose only purpose was one: To have fun dancing.
We found other people to dance with, everybody got a nice practice with eachother and we all had fun, no personal interests, and everybody respectful, and I drove a long distance, and one of the ladies offered to drive next time.
What a wonderful time. The good lesson, is that, If I did not have bad people in the past, I would have taken for granted these wonderful people who went out with me. Now I can appreciate nice moments, nice pepople and nice treatment from people.
Thank you god for my bad experiences. Today I went to church in the morning knowing that I did not do anything that I had to rerert and feeling safe.
Thank you God for this day.

[Hopalong]

Lupita!

 

You define Atta Girl.

love
Hops

[Certain Hope]

Lupita, that is wayyy kewl         

I believe that we can make that sort of day regularly, too! Because it's all about perspective.

Love,
Carolyn

[lighter]

That's the one thing about pain and the value of lessons..... eventually we see WHY we had to go through them but.....

it sure is hard to get to the other side in order to understand: /

You sound great today, Lupita.

Brava for your ability to right your boat and regain balance.

THIS IS A BIG DAY! 

Not only do you celebrate your citizenship.... you celebrate your growing ability to problem solve and handle conflict.

To make yourself feel better: ) 

[changing]

Lupita-

Congratulations on your new  American citizenship- I am so proud that you are a permanent part of our country! I am also happy that you are spending time with nice people who are worthy to associate with you. As for the others- just dance past them!

Love,

Changing

[CB123]

Yay, Lupita!  This is just the spark I see in you so many times.  I think it is what makes you so attractive to the people you go dancing with (even the crazy-boy).  I see you emote all over the place here--and then pick yourself up and go for it again. 

You are my hero, Lupe!

Love
CB

[Lupita]

I had dance class on Sunday. He was dancing right beside me. I think he is sick. He kind of enjoyed seeing me there, I perceived a marvellous smile and look in his face. Fortunately, I had an advance student practicing with me so I was showing him off. Still, my heart was pounding. I have to see him in class today too. Of course I have to dance with him. The teacher switches us all the time. Hope that he does not notice my nervousness.

But, this morning, in general, I feel much better. Thank you friends.

[lighter]

I'll be there in spirit.... beside you while you're dancing near dance boy, Lup...


Sticking my tongue out and shaking my fanny at him!

What a kitty who thinks he's going to eat the canary!

He has no idea you're going to dance right past him on this one, though.

He's still playing cat and mouse....

you're still dancing with the better dancers, laughing and having a wonderful time in dance class.

::nod::

You're gonna be just fine Lupita: )

[changing]

Lupe-

You outclass that clown in every way. Your notice of him was the only thing that gave him any credibility. You are such a refined lady, I can't see him holding your interest for long anyway. The One that would last would have to be intelligent and a real man, who values and cares properly for you (the kind of man you are raising your son to be). I love the way that you are handling him- he is making a big piaso out of himself! You are still a lovely and sincere lady, who can never be diminished by a clown!

Love ,

Changing

[Lupita]

Last Twesday, I was in dance class. Since the teacher swithces us around, I had to dance with sexy dancing bad boy. I could not sustain a look at his eyes. He was trying to make me look at his eyes. I could not. I felt so bad. On top of all, the ladies get together to go dancing on Saturday nights. We usually invite some students so we have somebody to practice with, and not to have to dance with strangers. Some how he penetrated that group and got one of the ladies to invite him. So, now I had to see him on Saturday night. I feel so upset.
Also he asked me on Tuesday when was my oath. He also pull him self in and gave me a good bye kiss when I was not eliciting nor wishing nor welcoming any physical contact with him.
Maybe Laighter is right. He is still playing cat and mouce. I start to get sick of him. But if I learn how to handle this, I will have advanced a huge step in my emotional development.
I appreciate your ideas.

[lighter]

Oh... you're just making things interesting for him, Lupita, lol. 

Be prepared for him to give you 'the look' many many more times.

He's trying to pull you in..... get needs met.... things that have nothing to do with you but he'll use you, if you let him.

Just keep dancing and ignoring him. 

Just keep looking around you at all the other people and lights and pay attention to the music... and the way your dress swishes and makes your legs look 10 feet tall.

Keep giving attention to the worthy people in your group bc worrying about him is a waste of your time, my dear. 

Do that thing with the imaginary helmet.... pull back and observe from a distance..... enjoy figuring out what he's doing and the fact that he won't be manipulating you.

But remember that he's a small small fish... you have to stay on a positive track.

He's a very good lesson.

Thank goodness he's smirking at you pre sexual encounter.

::whew!!!::

close call, over now, time to move on and stop beating yourself up you're fine it'll be OK you're just so dear, Lupita.

[Hopalong]

What she said.
In spades.

xxoo,
Hops

[Lupita]

Thank you so much Hop and Lighter for your prompt answer. It feels so nice that each time that I feel stressed i come here and get friends to talk to.
Well, today I had my ceremony of oath ofr citizenship. I loved it. one thousand people together from seventy different countries, we hug eachother, some cried, I cried, it was awesome. Sexy dance bad boy called me to ask me about it and congratulate me, he also told me he had a bad day because a client was rude. He should be a high school teacher to see rudeness around. Kids are rude.
I really need to put this guy behind. I really want to nurture my self, to be happy from the inside out, not viceverse. I want to detach and be more indifferent. I need to feel nothing.